I have had it, I cannot sleep, my brain knows, my fingers and toes cringing. My relatives giving me gifts for absolutely no reason? I told them I was downsizing, what do they do, give me gifts! I am claustrophobic, more 'rubbish'! No family hugs anymore! They know that I know! I did not deserve this, my PC outlook is getting worse, I have TOO MUCH wrong with me, absolutely NOTHING to look forward too, no incentive! Some of my family trying to get me to believe false solace with religion, stopped believing that forty years ago, that actually helped just thinking about that, a short solace from the most unlikely of places! Breathe in! I have lost touch with todays society, arrogant and corrupt! IF I was to survive this short charade, no ambitions left, no heaven on the other side! Dementia beckons! My only way out now is death, I feel I am flying towards a hard place! I am psychic that has been proved many times, my inner soul knows, death is close! I have tried suicide many times, that is why my body cringes so! How? More medical appointments on the horizon, they clash so many times, running out of options! I need for that body clock to be turned OFF!
5/10/2022
then 17 hours later
Amazing what can happen in 17 hours, chemotherapy for prostate cancer [the heavy stuff?] my sister will be in my corner, she's recovered from Thyroid cancer, knows the routine, my brother went through the procedure himself, nine years ago, realistically still a bit tender about it! Big day 23rd November, reckon will probably off line until new year. All my medical team versed up, my Schwannomatosis NF3 has been causing most problems with complications, hopefully get a couple days break before then🤞Mind has cleared a bit, a bit more realistic? All the best Adlon👍
6/10/2022
Written by
Adlon57
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
the good news is that , here on the group, a lot of us understand what is going thru your mind.
I get Xanax prescribed for my anxiety attacks, that works well when I need it. I live in a cannabis legal state. Cannabis helps too.
Your medical team has people on tap that you can discuss this with for you or any family members and they have meds to help smooth things out and make you feel much better. Many guys here report wonderful results working with this type of counselor. There are a large number of newer drugs that should help enormously.
Trying to get out and have some QOL times just for yourself or with family helps take your mind off things and can enrich your life as well. Now is probably the time to dig into QOL fun while we are able. Make the call / appointment tomorrow morning …. The sooner you can settle this down, the sooner you can get into QOL fun. You won’t regret using your remaining time enjoying the best in life.
I have many ills, been through many painful episodes; stroke, undiagnosed tumour on spine for two and a half years, broken skull, 400 + grand mal seizures, prolapsed discs, undiagnosed tumour on left elbow for four years, smashed rib cage, etc, so not afraid of pain, actually immune to pain killers now, HPT high pain threshold, a survivor, so I thought, then the system panicked, "A very good chance I will not come out the end?" because of body's poor general condition! Getting encouragement now, an appointment letter this morning "Clinical Psychology for Cancer Services", I am so used to getting through these painful episodes all by myself, like my doctors keep telling me "your a one off!" [I'm different!🥴🙄 ] and I would eventually struggle through! This time I really need help, I'm now completely in their hands!
ps. Something I've learnt over my 66 years, do not fully rely on medications, a bare minimum. natural alternatives if possible, yes!
I think you’ve made a wise choice brother… one more arrow in the quiver doesn’t hurt. Clearly you are a fighter and a pretty good survivor …sounds like , at first look , that it’s the right services too. From what I read on this group, psyc for cancer services have been very useful and for some nearly miraculous, using some of the newer generation of psyc drugs. I don’t hesitate a moment reaching over and have a Xanax ( or two ) if I need to …and I do. I use opiates as well and , of course, they bring their own little basket of ugly mental issues too yayahahahaya. Xanax works well , so far … but I wouldn’t hesitate to seek out some of the modern psyc help , esp based on the antidotal experiences many have posted here.
I admire your powerful stoic abilities brother … me, I’m the opposite yayahahahaya. I’m not going to suffer to my inevitable end , when I can cruise thru pain free . The tools are close at hand, no percentage in pain for me because I just don’t have to. Its not like I have to anguish over what using opiates might do to me in the future yayahahahaya yayahahahaya.
Hang in there brother, keep up posted as to how things go with your psyc cancer services, it’d be valuable information for the rest of us, and it’d be nice to learn they are helping you too. Dump that Debbie downer psyc junk and get up and out and enjoy some QOL time. Occupy your mind with road trips, family, beach time, shopping , being a foodie ( check out our QOL food porn posts on the group ) … it’ll lighten up the gloom and maybe even make you smile some too.
I have HPT high pain threshold, my system cannot identify pain, sending wrong signals to the brain! The brain cannot identify how bad or good particular pain symptoms are. Pain killers do not work on me, I just 'survive' through pain signals, that is why I'm such a nightmare in A&E departments! I slashed my hand in 2017 the doctor stitched up my hand, no pain killers! 2021 dramatic signals meant I was admitted to hospital, use of my left arm about 10%, [now about 35%] skin actually hanging off left arm, I could not control use of it, shaking uncontrollably, found it was my reaction to AZ covid vaccine, two jabs in left arm, also CT scan found that another epileptic seizure would probably be my last, a bash on my bonce in 2018, double seizure!
Latest psyc cancer services, because hospital visit transport would cost me £50, they are trying for phone alternative! I have diabetes 2 and pancreatitis, meaning I can't really enjoy myself much now anyhow? I am vulnerably disabled OAP with now limited pension, not a very happy bunny at present, has not had a holiday in 8 years, and weather at present not looking good at present🥴🙄
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Don’t know where I go from here.
Order by my daughter 
What should I expect at the end?
Thought I would never say this but I’m struggling!!!!
Struggling with ADT lack of libido
