Prostate Cancer Humor: We could all use... - Advanced Prostate...

Advanced Prostate Cancer

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Prostate Cancer Humor

FCoffey profile image
7 Replies

We could all use a few laughs. I like to tell jokes; please contribute!

True story:

While visiting old friends, the men were talking about wood splitters while the women compared notes on gardening. Eventually the women came to us as we were standing in front of my friend's wood splitter and asked us what we had decided.

I told them "We agree that Harry's ram is a bit longer and thicker than mine.

.

.

.

But that's only because of the Lupron."

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FCoffey profile image
FCoffey
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7 Replies
BrianE profile image
BrianE

Another true story.

Just before Christmas I had a fall and the Paramedics were called. They carried out a full review of my health and medications.

The male one was inserting a cannula and said "Just a little prick" and I replied "That's not a nice comment to a guy on Zoladex". To cap this the little female one who was in charge said " i didn't know he had such good eyesight!"

Brian

jdm3 profile image
jdm3

After a visit to my oncologist and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing fairly well all things considered.

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, 'Do you think I'll live to be 90?'

He asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer, wine or hard liquor?'

'Oh no,' I replied.

Then he asked, 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?'

'I said, 'Very little... My naturopath said that all red meat is very unhealthy!'

'Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, boating, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?'

'No, I don't,' I said.

He asked, 'Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?'

'No,' I said.........

He looked at me and said, 'Then, why do you even give a shit if you live to be 90?’

billyboy3 profile image
billyboy3 in reply tojdm3

EXACTLY MY POINT GENTS, GET UP GET OUT AND LIVE YOUR LIVES LARGE!!!!!!!!

.....and here's where you get me into trouble....lol :P A little reverse, but speaks to the hormones and treatments that come with the territory.

A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after the doctor had prescribed testosterone for her.

She was a little worried about some of the side effects she was experiencing.

She said, “Doctor, the hormones you’ve been giving me have really helped, but I’m afraid that you’ve given me too much. I’ve started growing hair in places that I’ve never grown hair before”.

The doctor reassured her, “A little hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone. Just where has the hair appeared that you’re concerned with”?

She replied, “On my balls”.

j-o-h-n profile image
j-o-h-n

Patient says to his Urologist just before his DRE, "doc let me make this clear to you, there better be only one hand on my shoulders."

Good Luck and Good Health.

j-o-h-n Thursday 05/17/2017 4:58 PM EDT

Shooter1 profile image
Shooter1

Last big laugh, 7 mo. ago. lookup 'Ladies and Gentlemen: Prepare to be amazed as I introduce you to "The Almost Hairless Torso Man"

ITCandy profile image
ITCandy

God visited a woman and told her she must give up smoking, drinking and sex if she wants to get into heaven.

The woman said she would try her best.

God visited the woman a week later to see how she was getting on.

"Not bad" said the woman, "I've given up smoking and drinking but then I

bent over to get some stuff out of the freezer and my boyfriend caught sight of my long slender legs, he pulled up my skirt, pulled my knickers

to one side and made love to me right then and there."

"They don't like that in heaven, said God.

The woman replied: "They're not too happy about it in Costco either!"

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