so yeah I have so many things I am trying to get done and make lists for them, and that list turns into having lists for my lists and can’t get anything done cuz I’m worried what I forgot. Need some other solutions or ideas please.
Already take meds for ADD/ADHD but don’t think they working anymore. Ughhh
Hi, , Your post about Lists etc was so descriptive and know i have the same trait ...drives me mad. If anyone can tell us a streamlined method, any advise , please xNice to meet you Scruffy x
Hey drives me mad when I can’t focus on one slide that’s four lists down the line. But I’ve learned if u just stay to one and set an alarm for like 15-30 min working on one project until the time is up then take a break and so on. This actually makes u feel like you’ve gotten some things accomplished. Xo
Hahahaha yes, totally. I also add a layer of feeling guilty about the lists which makes me procrastinate more 😩 A) I’d check with your prescriber about whether the meds are working B) something that has helped me is switching from goals (ie something on a list) to habits or processes. TLDR I write down as little as I can get away with because for me lists are the enemy and time block so I’m only doing one thing at a time.
I got this from reading Atomic Habits. So for stuff that bogs me down, like house work, instead of having a list of things to do, I try to clean or whatever when I think of it in the moment - I don’t write it down because if I do it will add to the mountain of things I don’t do. Or for stuff like getting ready in the morning or packing, I do it the exact same way every time. I shop at the same online stores - so I can rebuy my last purchases. It’s kind of weird but I figure if it was good enough for Steve Jobs …
Some stuff needs to be on a list like groceries, but for me lists turn into procrastination and overwhelm pretty quickly. I make a really rudimentary schedule for myself for the day with time blocks for what I want to get done - any anything I need to show up for like a meeting. Then I put those things on an alarm. I also force myself to take breaks to check in and see if I’m spiraling and what I need to do to get back on track.
Part of it also is acceptance, right? This is a pretty good system for me right now, but I still find myself accruing a backlog. At which point it’s like, if I’ve gotten to February and still haven’t done any of the yard chores from the fall, maybe I’m just not that person. Most stuff the world will keep spinning and it’s like, I’d rather play a board game with my kid than have a clean house so 🤷🏻♀️
Hi Scruffy81!
Have you ever tried body-doubling? It's the equivalent of having to do the dishes (which we may dread) but having a friend hanging out and talking with you while you do it - which makes it less tedious, as well as makes it go by quicker. I have a virtual assistant agency that supports ADHDers, and this is one tactic we take with our clients when there are things they need to do (things we can't do for them) but that they can't bring themselves to get started. Something about having that other person's presence, and the accountability factor that comes with that, seems to really help people get things accomplished that are on that list of a list of a list. 
You can recruit a friend to help or you can sign up for apps that offer it, and you can do it in-person or over a Zoom call. It's pretty flexible.
While we're inclined to create lists so we don't forget to do things, there is also something in our brain that semi marks it done once we've recorded it somewhere. I've taken to sitting down in the morning and picking 5 things from my list that I'd like to do that day - because I accept my limitations and know I can only accomplish a small part of my list in a day. Often, I will start with a task from that list of 5 that I know will bring me some dopamine, so that motivation begins to flow. Sometimes it helps to knock out the smallest/quickest task first, then I very deliberately mark it off my list - which gives me just enough of a sense of accomplishment that it usually helps me move to the next thing.
I've also found it helpful if I block time on my calendar to work on my list, with the full intention of ignoring the list for the rest of the day. If I know I only have to tackle that list for a limited amount of time, it often feels less overwhelming.
I think one of the main points is to not look at your lists as a whole. To do so will only induce overwhelm, which often causes us to completely freeze and therefore do none of the list. If you don't look at your lists of lists of lists, but only at the number of tasks you want to get done in the span of say an hour, then it doesn't feel like it's the whole list or nothing at all.
Obviously this won't work for everyone, but thought I'd put out there what tends to work for me. I hope it's at least a little helpful!
I have done the pick like a few to do daily off list of lists of lists and that SOMETIMES seems to get done. I have never thought about having someone to give me some company that you suggested, I’d offer if they wanted to do one of my things for me, u know I was raised to help others, so why not I get some help! lol. U mentioned some apps, can you give me a few suggestions that would be amazing. Thank u girl!🥰
Here are a few that I'm familiar with - but if you Google "body-doubling app" you'll find quite a few options.
getinflow.io/post/adhd-body...
Happy to help!!! 😍
That's why i hired programmer to create custom to do program as all on market suck balls... Still not everything can be planned ahead and with insomnia: i cannot get reliable schedule and things happen i have to plan accordingly, with chronic pain, living in toxic household relying only on myself, being existentially depressed despairing all the time, have to go on never feel pleasure (anhedonia)... Challenging as fuck still have to force myself to every small thing every day even hours it hurts in brain and chest abnormally and i have blurred vision, chronic headaches, RSI, spine pain and what not...
man I may not understand totally what you’re going through but I totally understand where you’re coming from. It’s not easy for us with ADD, ADHD, pain, depression, anxiety, etc. which all I have and have been dealing with for my whole life. The most worst thing is is when people tell you you’re just imagining it or you really don’t hurt or this test doesn’t say there’s anything wrong. It’s our bodies we know it best so the best is all we can do but we’re all here for you. And if you ever want to chat vent. Send me a private message I’ll listen.
Thanks, but i am estranged even from humanity, my humaness, humaness itself and self and it doesn't mean anything to me anymore, besides i know couple empty words cannot really help. And despair persists... Worst is being unable to help others watching them to suffer... I feel good right now, less derealized/depressed, but i am just so fucking empty... I am alone in whole world no one understands me and i cannot say that as it is arrogant so... It is taboo to talk about it... I feel like in nightmare where 99.999%+ are like NPCs in some fucked warped simulation honestly...
I also make lists for lists. My latest list project is commmbining my work and personal lists which is a hot mess. Etsy has some good digital planners for people e ADHD. For me when I have a long list I get overwhelmed and freeze. Then nothing gets done! I’m trying to set more realistic expectations as to what I can do in a day. Check out Etsy. You can get a good digital planner for less than $10. Most are created by people w ADHD.
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