Suspecting ADHD and struggling

[BigBlueHouse]

I feel so lost and would love guidance from this lovely community. I've struggled with and sought professional treatment for depression, anxiety, and dissociation. I've never been told by a person prescribing me meds or giving me therapy to get evaluated fully. I've been given psychotropics, SSRIs, SNRIs, benzodiazepenes, and a few other anti depressants. I don't mean to belittle or cast blame on these professionals. They wanted to help me with what I thought I was struggling with at the time. But after asking my doctor if I could ween myself off Abilify I noticed a much more intense mental baseline. I suspected ADHD and researched a ton about it. My suspicions grew stronger. I asked my wife, "Do you genuinely think I have it?" She even replied yes. Finally, I felt validated. I went to my physician to raise my concerns of my attention, how it might be related to my battles with depression and anxiety, shame, and issues in work and family. My physician said, "You might have ADD," but offered no referral or even moment to dwell on that possibility. I was scared of even looking like I put the thought in her head. So I quietly listened, or tried to. But felt entirely defeated as she looked me in the eye and told me she thinks I should finish my degree and that I'm doing great! I couldn't display how I felt so I agreed readily and left. I paid for that appointment out of pocket, with money that I felt shame for not using for a new toy for my daughter or new birthday gift for my wife's upcoming birthday. I contacted a clinical trial and was told the wait was "extensive". Does that mean months, years? I don't know. What do I do? Lol. 🥲

[STEM_Dad]

Since your doctor acknowledged that you might have ADHD, ask for a referral (or for your doctor to do the assessment).

Or, ask your college if they have a department that does ADHD assessments. Some colleges and universities do.

I worked at a public university for 10 years, and they had a department called the "Counseling and Testing Center" which I originally thought was only for academic testing, and later found out could test for ADHD and for learning differences like dyslexia.

I was diagnosed by a mental health counselor, thanks to a referral from my employer's Employee Assistance Plan (EAP). If you're currently working, then you can check with Human Resources if they have a plan like that. (Typically, EAP will have referrals for health information, mental health counseling, family planning, financial consulting, and possibly even legal consultation.)

Where you live determines whether you must be assessed by a doctor or psychiatrist, or if more mental health professionals are permitted to make an ADHD diagnosis. (Everywhere that I'm aware of, only a doctor or psychiatrist, or in some cases psychiatric nurse practitioner, can prescribe meds.)

[BigBlueHouse in reply to STEM_Dad]

Thank you so much for your guidance

[STEM_Dad in reply to BigBlueHouse]

I hope it helps.

Opportunities for assessment vary, based on where you live and what resources are available to you.

I'm sure I'm not aware of other options, so I hope if others have good ideas that they will chime in.

[BigBlueHouse in reply to STEM_Dad]

I'm contracted right now with my company but will switch over to a full employee soon and will get insurance then. There's some resources around, and it seems waiting times for evaluations are gonna be long no matter what. In the meantime, do I just keep coping and learning lifestyle and behavioral changes? I'm 28, I think I mightve been coping my whole life. I gotta just keep going I guess?

[AngelB85]

keep pushing. I had to and got diagnosed with bpp and Adhd xx

[Trying2Focus]

I agree with STEM_Dad and AngelB85 . A counselor told me that I didn’t have it because I also suffer from depression, which I have learned is inaccurate. I wasn’t trying to collect disorders, I just knew that from my feelings and behavior there was something else wrong.

A colleague told me that she had to inform some co-workers about ADHD because someone made a comment that no one needs Adderall and that it's only use is to be abused.

It’s no wonder I was was second guessing myself. Keep pressing, you will get the help you need.

[STEM_Dad in reply to Trying2Focus]

It's tragic that there's still so much misunderstanding about ADHD, including among some heath care and mental health professionals.It's been known for about 20 years or so that ADHD can have anxiety, depression, and other comorbidities. In fact, untreated ADHD makes it even more likely that a person will experience having anxiety and/or depression.

(It's still true that anxiety or depression can cause inattentive symptoms like ADHD. That's why an evaluation should include a person's history, going back to childhood, if possible.)

And the persistent misunderstanding about the difference in how Adderall, Ritalin and other stimulants affect people who legitimately have ADHD, compared to how they affect neurotypical people, just shows people's ignorance or judgemental attitude. It doesn't take much effort to check the facts on any of a great number of trustworthy sources.