Decision between in person or virtual?

[_khalil]

My 5 y.o bother has an immune disorder and receives iv treatment weekly. His school wants him to attend school due to sensory and speech issues, which I refused, as if he were to catch covid he would have a higher chance of complications and he wouldn’t be able to fight the virus off. I am unsure if I should send my other brother who is 7, as he has extreme behavior and learning issues. He is attending a behavior management school, the school states they will keep the kids distanced apart. I am doubtful as he often hits, spits and punches other children. Due to the severity of his learning disabilities, the school states he should attend in person school. It’s not that I don’t trust them, it’s that I am unsure if I risk letting him go to school and bringing something home (god forbid) and infecting his brother who has a lower chance of being able to fight off the infection. I am usually not hesitant, but am as a simple cold turns into Bronchitis faster then other children and then he has gotten hospitalized. I want them to succeed, but don’t know what to do. He is difficult to homeschool as he doesn’t sit still or focus and is violent. Any suggestions? Any advice is welcome. Thanks, I appreciate it.

[Onthemove1971]

Thanks for posting your question and sorry this is so stressful for everyone.

I think it is important to weigh the benefits to learning and what would help both the most. If you choice to truly "homeschool " then you could have a teacher help with the education of your brothers. They could help with setting up a individual program for each.

I understand you don't want your brother going to school but I would not recommend refusing services.

We are in northern CA and we are all doing distance learning and therefore all of our speech and OT are scheduling lesson online.

I hope you are getting help for your brother with behavior problems.

Hope this helps.

[abryans]

This is such a hard time! My husband is at very high risk. I am going to ask his transplant doctor if she thinks it is acceptably safe (nothing is a guarantee) to send my son to school. I will explain the school's plans and procedures (reduced class size, masks etc). My son really needs face to face teaching and the structure provided by school, but if it is not safe, they we will just figure out virtual as best we can.

[vivian2222]

Hello there,

I know how hard it is to take a decision like this. I am a mom of 2 and my youngest has nephrotic syndrome and his nephrologist recommended virtual School due to high risk of getting Covid. I am also a nurse and I would not send my kids to school during this pandemic. There are a lot lot consider especially if your brother like my son has an autoimmune disease. Kids cannot keep social distancing, they are kids and they like to play. Are teachers cleaning all the toys daily? Using mask/face shield? There are too many cases of asymptomatic people that are spreading the covid. Kids touch their nose and mouth constantly and unfortunately, there are a lot of parents that will send their kids sick to school. As a parent, I decided to do virtual for the safety of my sons. It is ultimately up to you to make the decision and to evaluate how your brother school is handling disinfection and distancing. If you decide to homeschool, you can get a time 4 learning which is very interactive with a lot of cool videos that keeps kids with some sort of learning challenge focus in the class. You can also try an umbrella school that will allow you to homeschool without having to worry about keeping a binder. Hope this help you. This is just my experience but you do the best for your brothers. Many blessings

[ADHD_DAD]

You didn't say where you live. My opinion would vary depending upon that. For example, in Upstate NY where we live, the rate of positivity is one half of one percent generally and even lower for the small area covered by the school district. With the mask, sheild, distancing policies at school and now saliva testing being done, the risk is very low. I would not hesitate to send any child to school (and my son is returning 5 days per week). Franky, since I have to go to work and to the grocery store, etc, I don't see how going to school with children from the same neighborhood whose parents shop at the same stores increases his risk.

Not to get sidetracked, but the main obstacle to reopening here has been the teacher's union which, as usual, has opposed anything which results in more work for teachers or which requires them to change the way they do things (despite a once in a lifetime, temporary woldwide health crises) The result here for most public schools is a 4 day teacher work week. Like working 4 days instead of 5 will minimize the risk! (In case you notice the inconsistency between the paragraph above saying my son is back 5 days and this saying the teachers are working 4 days, I moved my son out of the public school this year. If you ever read my posts, you know of my ongoing, exhausting battles with the public school. The fact that my son performed so well in the spring once once covid resulted in him not going to school-he had a 100 in every course but one in which he got a 95- finally convinced me that the school was the problem and not him).

Any way, my decision on return to school would have been very different here in March. In fact, I had to travel to NYC in March when the positivity numbers there were over 20% One person who traveled with me caught covid. No way I would send either of your boys with numbers like that.

So, my advice is watch the numbers, educate yourself as to what exactly your school is doing and consider whether attending school truly raises the risk significantly over staying at home. Most of us (despite being at higher risk than our children) are back at work with masks and social distancing and have no particular concern for bringing covid home. I would not feel like sending one child to school would place other household members at higher risk than I do by going to work. Hope this helps.

[ADHD_DAD]

P.S. God bless you for caring for your brothers. I suspect that is not what you signed up for. They are lucky to have you!!