I have been diagnosed with several things over the years. First digestive issues have hounded me since I was a child, in my teens migraines made themselves known. Then in 2015, I was diagnosed with CFS. In 2017, Ankylosing Spondylitis announced itself with pain and other symptoms.
However, through all of the years, I was able to handle what cropped up. I went to and graduated college in 2007. Started a decent career in 2008. Started climbing the proverbial ladder, brought a house, did all of the things you are expected to do, even as the health issues cropped up.
Then COVID hit, which kind of helped and kind of hurt. We moved to a hybrid schedule at work, which allowed me to pace a little more easily. However, doctor's appointments were scarier leading to cancellations, mix ups and cancelled meds. Every day things, like grocery shopping and eating out were harder and healthier items got harder to find as supply chain issues plagued the globe. And then things stated to go back to normal in late 2021.
It happened... early 2022. A migraine that wouldn't end for days, even with the meds. I couldn't keep anything down, even water. Wound up in the ER, admitted to the hospital. For three days. X-Rays, CT scans, and bloodwork. Then there was Physical therapy prescribed, for the upteenth time in my life. And another referral to yet another Neurologist, whose schedule was full for three months. So I waited and did PT.
It was during an at-home PT session in May of 2022 that I heard a loud pop in the attic that started a fire, that was luckily put out fast by three different Fire Stations. It wasn't fast enough, though, and the smoke damage was in every room, and the thing about water is it comes with it's own issues, and each room was ankle deep in water. So I started an inventory on the damage, while fighting every medical issue in my body that was exacerbated by the stress that I was suppose to avoid. While all of the fire issues were going on, I was also in talks with work because apparently, even though I was on FMLA, I was running out of FMLA. So in short, two weeks after the fire, I was also out of a job.
The rest of the year was spent at doctor appointments and working with insurance and contractors to rebuild the house. I did take some job interviews, but after talking with doctors and my therapist, realized, now might be a good time to reset goals and realign passions. In truth, my health was also still in the same place, and it might be time to reevaluate whether or not work and the type of work in my future. With the realization of not working in my immediate future, I had to come to terms with selling the house by the end of 2023.
2024 was a stagnant year of not making much progress on the health front. Which means I am still not working. I was able to buy a place outright with some of the profit from the house, so that's a plus. I am trying to be money smart with my Finance Degree with the rest of my money. There are monthly dues so that almost everything around the neighborhood is taken care of because my health doesn't allow me to do much.
what to do ????
Something is definetly wrong, is it schizophrenia?
I feel like something is wrong with me but I don't know what
Constantly feel bored and empty, like life has no meaning. 
The day from hell
