Death is looming in the windshield again!
This bastard has been too active in my life this year! My wife died a few weeks ago, and now, my brother is days if not only hours away from the end.
I don't know what to say other than I'm pissed that I didn't join my wife in death, I need to be connected to her.
If I hadn't made that pact with her?
I am so sorry no one responded. The anxiety and depression site on here gets a ton of foot traffic for support. I feel the pain and suffering in your post. Life is really heard. I make my husband promise me that I'll go first. Which of course we can't make such promises. I wish I had more words of encouragement.
I am very sorry for your loss. All I can say is take life one day at a time. The pain must be overbearing. There are seasons in our lives and I am learning to wade through and hope for the best. I would encourage you to seek out friendships that you do not have to talk to but people you can just "be" with.
I feel so bad for you, it's unbelievable that people have to suffer so much, I guess this happens to everyone, if they live any length of time. I've known people who;ve lost their spouses, the pain is unbelievable. This is what getting older gets you....
Finding it hard
how can I have closure on immeasurable grief that's as raw today as exactly a year ago?
Am I a monster? What am I? 
Hello
