I want to understand to help my father

[cockatiel55]

Asking for my father that three years ago he start suffer with tinnitus issues severe one from there he start going to visit several doctors and the answer from them received that didn't exist a cure for this condition and this answer start lead my father slowly slowly to depression and he loose also to much weight and change moods his age 68 year old now and he told me sometimes its not a life this and start crying an even my mother she really try to help him but its like both of them didn't have life anymore . I am her daughter try to understand and really I wish back my father at least I want to hear from his mouth I am better today. really hurts see him like that can you guide me thanks all.

[TinnitusUKPat Partner]

Hi Cockatiel

Whilst it's true that there isn't a cure for tinnitus, it is definitely possible for it to improve and not cause as much distress as it is for your father.

The messages that your father has received from doctors are important and that's why we would hope that a GP would focus less on cure and more on the available treatments and investigations which can be offered - often people experiencing tinnitus never get beyond the stage of seeing a GP, when there are hospital departments who can look into the situation and often be of great help.

Tinnitus isn't an illness or a disease - it's a symptom. And identifying what that symptom relates to - hearing loss, muscular stress, jaw problems, blood pressure conditions - is key to identifying improvements.

If your father hasn't been referred to see a hospital specialist, this should be your GP's first line of action if tinnitus is causing your father the distress that it seems to be.

With best wishes

Pat

Tinnitus UK support team

[Compressorman]

after checking normals like ear wax, eustachion tubes, yiu didnt say his hearing was affected??..I wud say he needs a head scan, that will rule out wot I have which is acoustic neuroma, a Tumour that grows on hearing nerve. Tinitus I have lived with for 42 years now, we all deal with jt in many wags, secret mainly is keep urself busy so u dont dwell on the noise?..music in headphones cud help, Serc tablets may help with he gets sick heads?No to alcohol, makes it worse also caffinafed coffee, go for decaf..Gud luck!...and read UKPat for other areas to look for like neck, jaw etc!

[doglover1973]

Hello there. A warm welcome. I'm sorry to hear your Dad is suffering. The first step is to ask his GP for a referral to ENT at your local hospital. They'll check his ears to make sure there's nothing wrong. Then they can refer him on to other services who can help - like audiology if he has hearing loss and / or a tinnitus clinic. A clinic will help your Dad manage the way he feels about tinnitus. Please know there's hope. It's possible to live in relative peace with tinnitus.

[cockatiel55]

Thanks all very kind of you very good points but my father he just pass this phase of all kinds of tests from acupuncture, and even audiologists but last Monday we had an appointment with a Tinnitus specialist and Audiologist too and he had about two hours of self assessment with the consultant and he make a special order for him a hearing aids that they are specify for tinnitus and cost the price to and he told him next time appointment need to clean one of the ear because have some wax and adjust this particular hearing aids hope works . anyone here have this particular tinnitus hearing aids please and experience with them ? and the clinic its part of this British Tinnitus Association.

[TinnitusUKPat Partner in reply to cockatiel55]

Hi Cockatiel. I think there's some confusion there - the British Tinnitus Association is a charity and doesn't operate clinics. Do you mean that your father was seen in an NHS audiology department?

[doglover1973 in reply to cockatiel55]

It sounds like you've gone privately. Please be careful about buying hearing aids from anyone who refers to themselves as a 'tinnitus specialist' . It may be just a selling point. The BTA - now Tinnitus UK - don't have any clinics - as TinnitusUKPat says. Pat is a staff member at Tinnitus UK. The NHS supply hearing aids for free which may well help your Dad.

[777john]

Hello iv gone through what your farther is going through and iv put my family through hell, tinnitus to me is like no other, the noises in my head can be unbearable, BUT i am much better at the moment and your dad will get used to the noise, its scary for everybody in the family but believe me things will get better. i haft to be blunt and say Doctors and so called specialist are useless because they don't know anything but you haft to go down that route, having a scan is the one positive thing you can do because that will clear up any issues in that department. A hearing test is good but that wont help the tinnitus. Please tell your dad that the tinnitus will ease and he will be ok.

[Graham-E]

Hi and sorry that you both are experiencing this. Just a thought as well as all the really good advice you will receive is that T can be a really lonely condition.

People don’t see that cast on your arm or bandage on your head. People forget in their day to day lives what the person is suffering from.

For me the scream is endless and loneliness is dreadful even around others.

Just a nugget.

Very best to you both.

G

[cockatiel55]

Really dear John777 my father changed a lot he lost amount of weights and sometimes he cry this thing leading him to a depression even sometimes he also mostly of the time stay at home he lost appetite and a long sleepless nights its like the world for him its finished and more time pass become more worst. really I feel guilty that I cant help him sometimes and I see always the same situation even my mother she is tired without routine she have a lot of patience but she have 70 year old and I am really worried about her health to she is exhausted to its like a dark tunnel without light.

[777john in reply to cockatiel55]

One thing that has helped me a lot is going for long walks, try and get your dad and mum to go out, getting motivated can be hard but being couped up is the worst thing you can do i am 62 and got a part time job 5 months ago its just 16 hours a week but that has also helped me as well i realty do know what your going through but i can only say again your dads tinnitus will improve. My wife was like your mum it exhausted her and in the end she had to go out more to get away from me which was hard on both of us but it gave her more strength to cope with me on my bad days, and at this moment in time we are back to being a normal family and enjoying our life and your family will be ok again.

[Hidden in reply to 777john]

Hi 777johnHow did you get well again? How did you improve the symptoms? I have an appointment to see the audiologist on the 8 Feb, I would appreciate your feedback please. Thank you. Frances

[777john in reply to Hidden]

Hello Frazoo after my tinnitus hit the roof it sent me in to severe anxiety after finally finding the correct medication for my anxiety my tinnitus improved, i still have loud tinnitus but have got used to it. what has improved my condition is going out every day going for long walks playing snooker and i have a part time job now which has realty helped me. It was a head injury which made my tinnitus which i had had for 20 years much worse the previous 20 years my tinnitus didn't bother me and after my head injury i had to pack my job in because it was such a loud environment so i was at home a lot. Getting out more and especially walking in the countryside made a big difference to me, apart from being active there's not a lot you can do about tinnitus its just a waiting game, tinnitus does calm down but you will have spikes. there is only one thing that makes my tinnitus worse is caffeine, hope that helps.

[Hidden in reply to 777john]

Hey thanks for your reply, nice to hear back from you 777johnGlad your getting out and staying motivated, I have been really down and depressed with the noises and not doing enough of that, the last year has been difficult, but you've been an inspiration to try and get a life again. Just been a nightmare for me. suicidal thoughts and actions. Hopefully by Spring time I will be feeling more able to enjoy these things again.. Walking etc

[777john in reply to Hidden]

Hello again Frazoo i not only had suicidal thoughts i went out twice to kill my self the noise in my head was overwhelming so again i know exactly how you are feeling, to me now its not the noise any more because I'm used to that ,its the volume of the noise and its amazing how you get used to that as well, and when you get used to that as you will then you will come out of that depressing feeling, you might not think it now but things will get better and you don't haft to wait for spring, get wrapped up and go for a walk now, that's what i will be doing in about 20 minutes and when you are walking take in all the surroundings to me it doesn't matter where i am but you cant beat the countryside. Take care friend life will improve.

,

[Hidden in reply to 777john]

Hi again 777johnIt was nice to hear from you again today, thank you, I took on board what you said earlier about getting out and went for that walk,it was a challenge to me, however spent a couple of hours in the fresh air, felt good to be outdoors again. Going to try and practice every day weather permits, until I get my confidence back. Like I used to be, thanks again for your timely reply, you too take care, Improvements accompany the future. for you to my friend

Frances

[Spurdog1]

Hi Cockatiel.

What a courageous thoughtful young lady. Once all other probs such as earwax is cleared 99% of what's left have Tinnitus. There are different types of Tinnitus, but no cure.

My daughter has a sound more like a hammer, I have a hiss like the seashells on your ear. You should ask your father how his sounds, and if it affects his hearing capabilities, my ear is almost useless, because of the tinnitus sound over-riding normal hearing.

Whereabouts are you? in a county in the UK? or are you international? This tells us what is more available to you.

It's early days he could do with group therapy, knowing how others cope with it, to learn and get better at coping. I was in a bit of a mess at first but today I have 20 years of it. It's the anxiety of it, that basically feeds the problem. You really need to chill out with it, easier said than done.

My fav way is masking it. Going out sea fishing the roar of the boat muffles the Tinnitus, this can be done in other ways, such as soft music. I now have a game to mask my Tinnitus, it's really rather fun finding areas that do, shopping arcades etc. Your dad must not lose heart, you have a lovely gift for him...your time with him.