I don't have children and I'm not sure I ever will. One of the things that puts me off having them is knowing that I am prone to fatigue etc. and not being confident that I would have the energy to take care of children properly.
I'm really curious to know how other hypothyroid women have managed to cope with motherhood and whether they feel their condition has affected their parenting abilities. Would appreciate any thoughts/stories.
Thank you.
I have 3 boys who are 7,6 and 4 - I think my symptoms fully kicked off when my 2nd was born. I remember going to the gp in tears as I was so tired and couldn’t lose any weight - he laughed me out of his room. I have only ever been ‘Subclinical’ but my symptoms have felt anything but. I have no idea how I managed to get up and do night feeds then up and out to school in the morning. I do remember a lot of tears in the shower though! My third pregnancy was very difficult due to no energy and he was very small when he arrived. My husband has helped a lot when he could but he was in the army so not a lot of time at home. My mum has often commented on how bloated and unwell I looked after the 3rd birth and I only really lost the bloating when I went privately for a diagnosis. I feel horribly guilty at how tired and grumpy I’ve been towards them but they are all healthy and happy so I can’t have been that terrible, I think even though we feel awful we still put them first and do what needs to be done. I still have good and bad days but they have learnt now that mummy doesn’t always feel well and they help me by being quiet and entertaining themselves. The silly thing is I would love another one after all that but I don’t think my body would cope anymore.
Similar but honestly I would have liked a lot more ‘fun’ out of having my children. I had no idea (even for many many years) that I had a thyroid problem. I did all the ‘right things’ for them but the ‘joy’ bit was difficult. Duty came first. I always focused on that. As I say I would have liked more fun, been more willing to be a bit more carefree. Striving for that at least that for myself now. However would not be without them. Grandchildren always welcome. Parents by appointment only. The grandchildren put light in my life the way my children could not. AND I can hand them back.
At least you know the source of the problem Zazbag and therefore in a much better position to do something about it. Knowledge is power.
With an understanding partner and/or family (be they from blood or water) to support you, you can do it. Striving for perfection when you have a health condition is not achievable and I too understand how difficult it is to accept you may not always be able to put your child needs first and letting that fear stop you from having a child.
But, you will find something reasonable that works for you all. The fact that you have even thought this, tells me you will make a fantastic parent! It’s those that don’t question their competence we should worry about.
However, I would try and get on top of your symptoms first. Perhaps your dose needs increasing or reviewing in some way for example.
Hello. I have Hashi+it kicked off at least from my first pregnancy. Have to say, once on Levo my life as a parent was fine. I had a c section with first baby but with second, a normal birth, plus I breast fed her for nearly 3 yes! I didn't go back to work so could take my time+rest but I enjoyed those early years+even tho our daughter didn't know what sleep at night was (til I taught her to read), I wouldn't not have been a mother! Don't be put off. Just like those with ME, pace yourself+you will win.
i tried one of those 'kid' things as a healthy single parent, and for 7 yrs it was fun for both of us .... then i met bloke and he wanted a kid so i thought , hey , why not ? having two can't be much different to having one.
~ bang ~ post partum hypo .
everyone survived (apart from the relationship) .... i do feel very guilty about the lacklustre / low energy / 'sorry not today' kind of parenting they both got from that point on , even though it wasn't my fault, and i did my best ......
but i know i'd feel a lot more guilty about my various parental failings if i'd deliberately had a kid when i knew i was already struggling . That might be a bit hard to deal with .
pick how you feel on your worst evening at the moment .. (because this may be as good as it gets) and then imagine having to motivate a reluctant rude teenager to do some very necessary maths revision/ or 'late' homework (properly) for 2 hours while it rants at you that it's life is rubbish because it hasn't ever had a nice bedroom like it's friend all have , and it's fed up because your house is a mess and it's not fair that you are always too tired and everyone else has a 'fun' mum ... and then wash and dry it's p.e kit at midnight because you forgot what day it was (again) ...... and then before you can finally go to bed ,... wash the cat sick off the sofa ( because 'kids' tends to lead to 'pets' you don't really want ) ..... it's all a bit of a hard slog through the mud .
my youngest is 25 now and totally self sufficient .. ..oh ... just excuse me a minute while i go and clean up after this geriatric yodelling cat with dementia .....
As long as you go in with your eyes wide open and accept the fact that you're not going to be able to be the "perfect mummy" all of the time and accept those limitations you'll be fine. Yes, they are hard work, especially in the first few months but, as they become more independent, you really can have some real fun with them. Having a supportive partner willing to get involved with every aspect of parenting is also important.
And when you get the grandchildren... well, you'll never look back!
Hypothyroidism
Hypothyroidism
Hypothyroidism?
Not hypothyroid...
Hypothyroid
