I've always known I'm a little differently wired, more sensitive to sound, smell, crowds (never stuck around for school dinners 😬) etc and now with all this talk about women being diagnosed much later with Autism as they are far more skilled at masking and mimicking, Yep got that T shirt too!
I thought everyone did a bit of grin and bear it...
I can't personally see why I need a diagnosis to label me... it's just the way I am?
But I have found over the last few years that I care even less about fitting in and complying, happy in my own skin and far more likely to go my own way rather than toe the line and conform.... just wondered if anyone else found this and whether the 3 things are connected?
Or is it just an age thing and a rather more devil may care attitude do you think? Regardless of the autism traits?
Just curious 🤗
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Isn't it great that society seems to be becoming more accepting and tolerant of individuality😃! At least Western societies generally I think. I feel sorry for the pressure to conform in other parts of the world but I tend to think of it as being closely related to human rights issues.I've heard the argument about labels and I'm all for naming conditions, recognising the presentations, challenges and opportunities where appropriate.
Children I know, who have struggled through early school years find a great burden lifted when their behaviour and feelings are identified as some of these increasingly familiar acronyms, so long as they can access necessary supports and be treated with respect.
I've suspected recently that there may be a link between these conditions and similar ones too, arising from inflammation. Hopefully we'll learn more as technology advances.
Sometimes there's not a lot to celebrate about getting older apart from that feeling of letting go of concerns about people's opinions 😃
Great post. I am sure I am a bit on the spectrum and have just last week had my ADHD confirmed at 56. An important point is how much energy you can use masking and fitting in. It is making an important differences to me dropping this behaviour, albeit at the cost of friendships.
Isn’t everyone a bit of something Eeyore100? And even with policy, frameworks and training, isn't it all a bit subjective?
I used to stop and take breath but now not working atm, observe and indulge OCD tendencies and I love it 😁. If I don’t know something and want to, I simply spend a whole afternoon investigating, sometimes for days, and I can’t bear unanswered forum posts so always reply, even if only to ‘bump’. Oh, and I never have the TV volume on an odd number as that actually hurts my ears 😳🤷♀️🙄
We only need a label if it’s gonna be beneficial. Some need additional help, others don’t or can’t allow themselves. As StPetes mentions great for kids, the Early Years Foundation Stage (EYFS) identified thousands who would have slipped through the net.
As I get older, I'm more accommodating of myself and those surrounding me, (even love my husbands snoring now. An amazing transformation!) and its not just to do with less pressure of life and needing sleep but that transition from striving for constant improvement, eg job promotion, bigger house, more holidays, to suddenly realising I don’t want anymore because everything is enough. Even when I lose, my 'enough' remains.
Oh gosh yes. I wasn't clear but it was my witchinghour, at about 2am this morning 🙄.
Having just rethought, it was the previous ridiculous, exhausting days of obsessively cleaning, checking the front door is locked, waking to think the cooker might have been left on, lists everywhere that had to be completed at the expense of more important things, etc, all squashed in between a busy life and work and feeling the over whelming repercussions of undiagnosed hypo/hashi. And since replaced by hours of reading/learning, with a balanced and level mind/body (Armour bliss 😁).
So my conclusion is it's not solely our destiny, genetics, ACES, environmental factors, etc but optimising thyroid hormones which has really driven balance in both my mental and physical state. Hope for us all 😊
ps - I think you missed my answer re your post on gut bacteria & CFS as I was late to the party (probably up at my witching hour again 🙄). Zoe for me is April/May. I'm hugely inpatient so got a free blood glucose sensor to get in the Zoe spirit but haven't had time to use it as suddenly busy.
WELL! I was logged in with the Zoe email address and the chap I spoke with was able to access all my data and sent me a report (which was actually mega helpful). But I can't see the data! 🤷🏻♀️
This has always been my thinking, we are all a bit autistic which rather defeats the labelling system
For us to thrive as a species we need people that have all range of different strengths... they are not weaknesses
Totally agree even numbers are the ones! Odd ones are... ODD!
I shall hold out for the acceptance of snoring 🙏🤣 I find at least 2 walls between us at the moment might just save his life 😏
I've always been quite happy with my (to some) meagre lot and if others don't like my straight talking then they are of no loss to me 😉 can't be doing with superficial, fake folk
'superficial, fake folk' 🤣 Try saying that when you had one too many.
I must admit I do put a pillow between us sometimes as it's that breath thing now. The snoring noise is ok but I wish he would just stop that breathing! 🤣
i've never understood why anyone chooses to try to actually 'sleep' with some else in their bed , its bloody annoying. and then they complain when you wake up and eat biscuits.
buy a house with 3 floors...it's so much more civilised i think .... means there's a fighting chance you might actually be pleased to see each other every morning
🤣 So true! I've been having a much better time of things in my own room... trouble is the dog decided to join me, she is a considerably quieter under the bed companion but does insist on me paying a biscuit tax 🙃
So you periodically start chanting ommmm .... and then you buy a bolster to enhance the position of your sacroiliac joints in relation to the Kordylewski clouds by sleeping with it between your knees 😁 ....... and then in the event that any phenomenon should suddenly happen you keep it stored between yourself and the breath like a little wall! Everyone's happy 🤣
Thank goodness we are all different, Eyesore otherwise life would be so robotically boring . Where does normal end and different begin? Think we all have a bit of divergence in us. As long a person can cope with life in their own way there is no need for a label. Be who you are.
I do think an early diagnosis would have helped me as a younger woman (I am not officially diagnosed with Asberger's but it seems highly likely to me) but yes, the pleasures of aging! More self acceptance, stopping the pressure to do things you "should" in favour of, "Do I actually want to? Will I feel comfortable?"
Hi, I wonder if I have autism and some kind of estrogen issues, I'm 45. My hypersensitivity and OCD is really tough on top of my thyroid problems. I definitely feel there's a link between the three.I think if you're ok then there's no cause to label it. If you're verging on not ok then maybe address it if you feel up to it.
I'm the same Tinkerbell. OCD and hypersensitive. Almost certainly undermedicated. I tick a lot of boxes for Highly Sensitive Person too so that's in the mix as well.
Given the link between mental health problems like anxiety, depression, etc and thyroid, I do think there's a link.I'm sorry you're feeling this all too! Do you cope ok?
I agree. My OCD improved dramatically when I started to get near to an optimal dose... Also its worse in the 2nd half of my menstrual cycle so I really do think it's at least partly hormonal.
I also have a really poor response to stress; feels a bit like my adrenals are already at capacity and then stress just makes them stop and all I want to do is sleep!
I have better days than others generally speaking I'd say I cope alright but some days it's totally overwhelming.
Yes I get the same menstrual cycle links too. Always have since a teenager. There's the OAT axis link as well, Ovarian Adrenal Thyroid which might be relevant here. I struggle with even higher sensitivity when I take T3, I'm thinking I need to work on converting my T4 to T3 better but I'm hypersensitive to all vitamins and minerals supplements.
I'm the same re adrenals, stress, sleep.
I thought I was about where you are last November, though as it turns out I wasn't coping at all, just masking from myself completely
Then my relationship broke down with my partner who I'd been with for nearly 20 years, because of my ill health. I lost this relationship and my home and I've been in a spin since. Basically I'm having to learn that I was masking how bad my health is. And I'm losing my work as a result and having to now turn to these labels and try and get help from benefits.
This is why I say if you're starting to struggle, look for help. For me I had no idea I was about to lose everything and be in a position where I need those labels to get help.
Sorry not trying to hijack, just trying to say we can mask from ourselves just as much as from others.
Sorry that you're facing such challenges tinkerbell22. I hope your circumstances improve very soon with the appropriate supports.
I read something super controversial the other day that speculated autism was an autoimmune disease! ... Just throwing that out there to you, Eeyore! 😂
I'd be interested to read more about that Witchinghour. It's a theory thst I suspect may have some credence but I haven't seen any research yet. Your response to stress reminds me of a boy who 'shuts down' and falls asleep immediately when he's overwhelmed, only in severe instances. It seems to be a survival instinct. He has autism and he's coeliac too. I wonder if it's adrenal related but I know very little about adrenal imbalances. Next on my learning list 😃
Yes, I'd read something about the link between gut health in babies and the higher prevalence of autism or auto immune.... it does makes it seem like autoimmune is the human condition that is likely to effect all of us at some stage of our life, they seem so pre-occupied with cancers that will likely kill you rather than autoimmune that can make for a long miserable, restricted life 😕
I've just found plenty of related info about this in older discussions (seven years ago) on this very forum 🫣. Procrastination is often a problem for me - the back of my head is a busy place 😄, I should've checked here first.
personally ,i prefer to only associate with people who are 'a bit different' .. They make life sparkle.
my kid wouldn't look me the eye as a baby .. turned his head away , found red LED lights irrisistable as toddler,, no matter how far away or out of bounds they were , pushed chairs off the table and shouted NO...DON'T SING when it was singing time in parent and toddler group , despite being well behaved for the rest of it.
In kindergarten we gave him a special job of misting the moss gardens with a little brass plant sprayer to do whenever there was a group activity that he couldn't handle .. so he could watch from the sidelines without having to be excluded or ruining it for everyone else.
Not remotely upset by coming across the body of his puppy without any warning that it had been killed the night before .. just curious to know whether it's head had cracked the cars headlamp.
He Thinks how electricity and computers and engines work is 'obvious'. and has done since he was about 6.
He doesn't have a label and i wouldn't have wanted anyone to give him one ...,i sent him to a steiner school where his only label was his name and where a good teacher has the autonomy to treated every kid as 'whoever they are' .
Everyone who meets him, loves him ...and he can mend your computer . When he was 5 i really worried about him not being like the other kids ... by the time he was 16 i was extraordinarily glad he wasn't.
Some people say i'm a bit autistic too ... i just think i'm a tattybogle , and i always have been.
The sooner we figure out who we are, the sooner we can get comfortable with it and get on with doing 'whatever floats our boat' and finding a way to make 'whatever that is' be of some use in the world.
I need to organise other people's blood test results, cos i can't abide a messy history.
Exactly tattybogle! I could never understand why the term 'snowflake' was derogatory. Live is too short to try to change individuals away from their essential selves. Sparkle on ✨️
Embracing Individuality is so important for everything isn't it .. find what works for the individual .. don't try to make the individual fit the formula .
i sent him to ' normal' school for a bit when he was 5 .. at parents evening they showed me his more or less blank work books (he wasn't ever interested in using pencils ) ,said he spent too long at the lego tray and explained they were concerned about his unrealistic expectations because he wanted to make things out of lego that would really fly. .... stupid people.
A good teacher at steiner school let him explore how to make things do what he wanted them to ( which out of necessity involved having to use a pencil and read stuff) . When he was 10 he made himself a rechargeable red light for his bike in an ice cream tub, using bits off cars he blagged from the scrap yard bloke , and asked me if he could plug it into the mains to charge it up .. i crossed my fingers and said ok ... worked great. lasted about 7 days on one charge and you could see it from the top of Ingleborough.
Then he put it on his kite and made it fly ......
If there are any campers who think they saw a UFO over Logans Rock in cornwall one dark night in 2001. you didn't ....it was him .
I was diagnosed ( spontaneously ) during my sons Asperger’s occupational therapy/ speech therapy when he was in primary school.
We were doing “role playing” as part of his therapy and I absolutely couldn’t do it properly….
Mine is quite mild. I’m just a bit serious minded and very practical… a bit of a savant with foreign languages ( for an American.)
The thought is our autoimmune disease may play a role. ( Antiphospholipid Syndrome)- My mom had the same disease, though much milder, and she did not have any Asperger traits.
Yes, I watched it and though yep masking and people pleasing... I'm so done with all that nonsense, nowadays I just say it like it is... like it or lump it 😉
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