Iv been having panic attacks on and off for a while now. Yesterday my eldest son came to stay with my grandaughter which was lovely. When they went home today i felt such panic and could quite put my finger on it but something feels missing from my life. My son lives only 35 miles away from me but i miss out on the day to day things and have never really got used to not seeing them both often. I think what makes it worse is that because i am not well i cant just get in the car and take myself over to see them.The other thing is i feel im not needed, that they get on with their lives which is great and what i want them to do, but i still have this need to be needed. Im divorced and happy to be, not looking for another relationship and always thought i was happy on my own, which i am , just a little emptiness inside.