Hi. I think my symptoms are very similar to yours. For some years I thought it was diverticular disease, which was diagnosed 3 years ago but having followed advice to take more fibre I found it was getting worse. Then, I recently went onto the NHS website and, apart from constipation which I don't suffer from, I have all the symptoms listed. I get pains in the mornings and go to the toilet 3-4 times during the morning, feel slightly nauseous at times, am very tired all the time and have backache if I stand for more than a few minutes. I cannot go for walks as I can suddenly need the toilet and get diarrhea about once a week and take immodium which helps. I too seem to not need to go when I'm travelling, especially on a plane, which is weird. I guess it might be something to do with a change in your routine?
I avoid heavy meals and spicy, fatty foods if I can which is frustrating for my husband as he was a chef and likes lots of hot, spicy chillies in his food and uses butter liberally (which I love!). So, he's had to tone it down a bit otherwise I'm miserable with the pain. I am trying ginger tea and also fennel tea but I do love my gin and tonics in the evenings which probably doesn't help!
I'm sorry to hear about the effect it's having on your life. My step Mother also has the same problem going for a walk and being out and constantly needing the toilet. I know the food thing well too. Between my partner, who's vegan and has cast iron digestive system and me who wants to eat everything but constantly has to stop myself for the consequences, we're a right pair ! I tried quitting gluten, which I felt worked for a while but then went back to because the symptoms came back. One thing that does seem to have an effect is taking a good probiotic tablet like BioKult. Also, Spiralina which both seem to have some stabilising effect.
Have you tried Alflorex probiotic? Many food intolerances are caused by a gut bacterial imbalance, which Alflorex might help with. It has been scientifically studied for IBS. It might help you eat a wider variety of foods. I was like you about fibre until I tried Alflorex. I can now freely eat wholemeal bread and other wholegrains. Although it hasn't enabled me to eat anything I want, I am certainly able to eat much more than I used to. Fibre can also help bulk out stools which can help with loose ones.
I can echo your symptoms! Been 20+ years for me with IBS. Managed to get some relief from IBS when I started taking a probiotic 5+yrs ago. All was great - almost a normal life - then I got Covid this past Oct and I have been in the throws of an IBS attack. Can't stop it. Don't really want to take immodium constantly as I have kidney issues. Very frustrating. The plane phenomenon is weird - don't know if its a dehydration thing or the brain telling your bowel to shutoff since you are leaving home! LOL
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