Just me and my Mia

[TheShadowHalf]

Has anyone noticed that the people who get better or at least manage to quieten the Mia/Ana voice all have partners?

Either that or they're young and at home. It's funny because people always expect you to get better and say Oh do This, do that, and you sit there exhausted and mumbling that you HAVE tried.

Sometimes you need someone who will take away the choice, who can push back at Ana/Mia when you're too weak.

Where are these people for those of us that have full time jobs and can't go into daycare?

[crazycrossstitcher]

Have you tried ABC - they have befrienders - I found having them help me was a great support and helped me look at issues etc - and they phoned weekly in evenings. Also I would suggest you try to get some counselling - I know how strong the voice can be and you really do need some specialist help to sort out the issues surrounding the illness so don't be alone - but you do have to go to a GP for a referral - and it can take quite a time to get help - I've been waiting almost 6 months but hopefully I'm about to get some help.

[TheShadowHalf in reply to crazycrossstitcher]

Thank you! Even to have you reply is sadly comforting. Its hard because this seems like all I have you know.

The one part of my life where I'm not judging myself or competing.

I'm just so tired of doing this.

I'll definitely look at the abc helpers

[joanna21]

Hi our daughter who will be 18 in May spent 8 moths as an inpatient 2 years ago. Since being discharged my husband & I have been her main support. My husband gave up his job & is now her full time carer whilst I reduced my hours at work in order to help too. We often say how do people cope if they do not have this family support & we have indeed seen young people that she was in hospital with relapse as they do got get enough support from the family when they come out of hospital. I hope ABC can help as per Crazycrossstitchers reply or perhaps you can seek out family or friends to help xx

[TheShadowHalf in reply to joanna21]

Thank you, I'll look into abc. My family live in New Zealand and we don't have that kind of relationship. Good luck for your journey xx your daughter is lucky

[Smarsh]

Hey! I'm a single person living away from home who has recovered! It is possible. It took a good therapist and a lot of willpower, and a few failed attempts. But try not to see singleness as a negative - i genuinely think there are positives to it in recovery, for example one of the things that always set me back when i tried to get better at home (with parents) was that any little change in my eating was commented on, even positive changes, so it made me super self conscious about it. Plus the people closest to me expected me to act/eat in a certain way after a while which made it hard to change. But on your own you have the freedom to make positive changes without comments or judgement. Of course the flip side of that is you havent got someone to hold you accountable. Could you ask a close friend to do that?

X

[TheShadowHalf in reply to Smarsh]

Thank you! Any kind of success story from that point of view is amazing and gives me hope.

I actually don't know anybody in London or England we'll enough to have them even know about my thing, let alone have them bare the weight of being my encouragement.

Have you ever tried hypnotherapy?

I just need distraction. Even to have a good day a week and build on that would be great but at the moment I just have no motivation to change.

Congratulations to you for doing this. Thank you for sharing too xxx

[Smarsh]

Never tried hypnotherapy. Maybe see if there are any support groups or Mind mental health groups nearby. If you're in London, there are bound to be loads. It might be a good way to meet friends or just other people who are going through similar things.

Might also be worth outlining what a 'good day' would look like for you. What are you aiming for? What needs to change to make that happen? What's standing in the way of making those changes? It's good to have a goal to visualise, even if its just a small starting step. You definitely do have to have the desire to change though. Maybe also try outlining all the negatives of your illness and all the positives of wellness. What will you gain or regain from getting yourself better?

Best wishes to you x

[lillyofthevalley37]

It's so true that Ana and it seems Mia like victims to be isolated and without support that way they can really control their victim

Partners and family are fighting Ana and Mia bc their loved one can't stand up to them and it works

You can still fight Ana Mia on your own my daughter had anorexia and found praying to be a great help if you're not religious then it's different but you can beat it