Why can't I stop beating myself up over decision I made?

[dumsiege]

My wife and I bought a house recently. Due to their being another offer on the house, we only had a day to decide if were going to make an offer. Typically, when I make a big decision I take a long time to research everything and make sure I'm comfortable with the decision. In this case I didn't have that luxury. After living in the house for 2 months I have this terrible anxiety that I made the wrong decision because I didn't take enough time to make sure I was comfortable with it. I know I can't go back and change it, but my thoughts will not let me be happy. I have had really bad anxiety and I can barely eat during the day, because I spend all day replaying everything in my mind. My wife is happy and I'm appreciative of what I have, but I just can't convince myself that I didn't do something wrong. How do I get past this?

Thank you.

[Hidden]

Sounds like myself, you’ve gone into panic mode and you are terrorising yourself, I’m excellent at that! Speak you GP they may offer you something to calm you, it’s a massive stressful thing buying a house, you really need to stop being hard on yourself ( another thing I’m excellent at!) try and turn it round and get some enjoyment out of it, just try!

[BonnieSue Dream Team]

It's called Buyer's Remorse and if you google it you'll find all kinds of info on it including a law by the same name and Psychology Today's take on it. You might have some OCD besides, your doctor could probably tell you. The point is it's very natural and common for you to question the rightness of such a huge decision...it's the biggest purchase most people will ever make...and especially because you had to make it so quickly. But it's over & done and chances are your decision is just fine. Someone else wanted the home, right? They thought it was good also! Now do your best to maintain it and keep up it's value for resale time and you'll have made a good investment. Do some soundproofing if you really are convinced you need to, ok? Good windows make a huge difference and walls can be reinforced also. You'll be fine.

[Carstalled]

Hi dumsiege, I can relate on the made-a-decision-without-being-ready situation you're in but mine is in terms of business, so I beat myself up for taking on activities that lead me to dead end revenue. I started a business back in 2002 without hassles and I slept well and long each night - I was happy. Business and the consumer community has changed so much in just under 15 yrs it has put me in anxiety and I now have hives!

I do so appreciate this support community! Today, I've begun calling and reaching out online for business improvement help to pull me out of my "quicksand hole of problems." LOL

I do hope you find the technique right for you to minimize your restlessness. I recommend a daily dose of the reality shows on home buying, repairs, etc. If you see others struggling with massive home issues, you may find some calm that your home and wife are so far doing ok.