How to Offend Your Male Patients

[Youngren]

I had what I thought was a blackhead in my pubic hair so I made an appointment with an all-female dermatology office. The reason I made the appointment with a female office is that I don’t like to be touched down there by a male.

When the nurse practitioner came in, she brought her medical assistant. I was not told why the medical assistant was there. I chose to ignore the medical assistant. My blackhead was excised and I was happy with my treatment. At the end of the appointment the nurse practitioner said, “I want to give you a full body skin examination. Since I was 73 and constantly in the sun playing golf, I agreed.

In the meantime, I went on line to find out about a full body skin examination. The one thing that was consistent about every article was the need to “get naked”. One article even said, “If you dermatologist does not ask you to get naked, get another dermatologist.”

When I arrived home from the full body skin exam, I realized that I had never taken off my underwear. The exam had been incomplete.

The next day I was scheduled to have some spots on my face frozen. Before that was done, I complained that my previous examination had been incomplete. The nurse practitioner and the assistant left the room for about 10 minutes. The nurse practitioner and her assistant returned with a dermatologist who she introduced. I was directed to the examining table where the nurse practitioner did the examination. Now I am completely comfortable letting a woman examine me. She is just doing her job! Now I am naked from the waist down in front of two women who are sitting at my feet just watching. I have an audience! All I can think about it is, “don’t embarrass yourself, don’t get an erection!”

When I asked them to tell me before they admitted a third party into my examination, they said find another dermatology clinic.

The purpose of the medical assistant was for record keeping. Her title was scribe. What was the reason for the presence of the dermatologist? I was told later only after I forced them to tell me, that when I complained about the incomplete skin examination, the nurse practitioner felt it necessary to have a dermatologist supervise the rest of the exam. I find both explanations satisfactory.

What is the lesson to be learned here? It should be obvious, communicate with your patients. If you bring third parties into the examining room, tell the patient why they are there!

[toofreakedout]

congrats to you for speaking your questions and getting answers. I really wish i could make that happen.

[Earl2345]

Welcome to feminism. I stay away from female doctors, lawyers, and almost everything else because they either hate men or don't give a damn about their welfare. In the medical realm, a person MUST be assertive or they will get bulldozed.

[Hidden in reply to Earl2345]

Earl2345. I have never had a problem with the female doctor , nurse or etc. I have had problems with the male doctors in fact when I was scheduled to see him again the new doctor (nurse practitioner) told me he was fired for his bedside manner. He was very vocal and very harsh with his procedures. I was glad to get anyone else other than him. In had to change hospital because when I saw the male doctors after the female, it was thought that I ratted him out and they were very harsh with me. The nurse practitioner wanted me to stay in with her but I told her I had to see these guys every time I went to their facility. I was innocent and she believed in me.

[Modestmale]

Good for you. You will be better off going somewhere else. Unfortunately especially male patients have to go to every appointment “locked and loaded” and prepared to speak up and defend himself at every turn.

I made an appointment with a male dermatologist to look at sun damage on my face and back. Due to past abusive medical encounters with female workers and the unmanageable and dehumanizing chaperone policies adding female upon female to the embarrassment, I would never voluntarily see a female physician.

When I arrived I was taken back to the exam room by a young female and told to remove all of my clothes. I told her the consultation was for my back and face, limited to above the waist, so I would remove my shirt but not my pants.

She left and a few minutes later a very angry and aggressive female physician assistant entered to conduct the exam accompanied by the first female sporting an iPad to take notes and photos.

I asked her what happened to the doctor I made the appointment with and she said: “The doctor never sees patients on an initial visit and then only after I deem it is necessary. “ She proceeded to tell me they require total body skin exams of all new patients. I told her I would never consent to anything like that and had not been advised of such a bizarre office policy. It went down hill from there.

She looked at my skin for a few minutes and had her helper take some photos. She said “I don’t see anything I want to cut on.”

They left the room and as soon as I could put my shirt on I was gone in a flash, never to return.

I found out later that they automatically put new patients on her calendar rather than the doctor’s calendar but never disclose this to new patients, They do not consider this practice to be deceptive or unethical but everyone else I talk to about this does. It also works out for them economically because the PA is paid far less than the doctor.

Now my anxiety over what happened will keep me away from all dermatology care, unless I can verify through an existing patient that another male doctor will not do this to me.