Communicating: How to Talk Without the Awkwardness

Guys.

What are some thoughts on communicating with parents. siblings, friends, spouses? As guys we all know it can sometimes (if not always) be very difficult to express our feelings. And yet our lack of doing so causes nothing but stress in our lives. How can we change that? Thoughts??

[StayHealthy15]

We have to somehow get over that fear of expressing ourselves. Some people might be scared at how they will be seen after these feelings are expressed especially since society has put men in a specific masculine role. I see this in my life also as some topics i am open to expressing myself and in others I stay more shielded. It could also deal with comfortability and trust. You don't want to open up to just anyone. I feel like there isn't a golden answer to this question so I am also interested in what other people say.

[johnsmith]

Don't change them. You are treading into dangerous territory that the manuals do not tell you about. The negative backlash you can get from people you discuss your feelings to. This is why the brain creates awkwardness as a warning to tread with extreme care.

Women complain when men don't discuss their feelings and then they complain when a man does. This is because a man is hard wired to discuss feelings in a different way than women.

The words to describe feelings are not common. We can agree what the colour red is. We can point to an object and say it is red in colour. We cannot point to an object and both agree its level of anxiety. This is because our anxiety cannot be felt by someone else. The someone else may have had the relevant experience to relate to your anxiety or they have not had that experience that enables them to relate to your anxiety.

At what level of anxiety are you before you describe that yourself as anxious. Someone may have a totally different level of anxiety before they describe themselves as anxious. These two different levels can led to a communication mismatch where you talking about one thing and they think your are talking about something else.

Be grateful for the awkwardness, it can be most useful and is there to be made use of.

Hope this helps.