Past insults

[Cenzen23]

I freeze whenever people insults me bcoz of childhood trauma. But I beat myself up for not talking back to them.how to cope up

[mimis10346]

I get that completely. I froze a lot in my childhood when some people did things. Do you also feel guilty if you do stand up for yourself? Do you shake when you stand up for yourself? I do and have a lot of problems with that. I see these things so clearly for what they are, but they don't go away. It's wiring. I'm over 4 decades into this "recovery", and now accept some things are just here to stay. Cope up? That's a great thing to say! I wish I could. And I hope you can too.

[Youshallnotpass84]

Aww, this made me cry. It's hard not to shame ourselves for other people's behaviour, isn't it? I was asked why I didn't fight back as a kid. I felt seriously shamed, so I literally kicked them next time. It changed NOTHING and made no difference whatsoever!! I'm a quiet, non confrontational person, but I've tried shouting and swearing. It doesn't work. It's crazy making because they actually want someone to talk back/fight back to them! We are not the ones who should be experiencing regret or self blame for bad behaviour. That's on them. The ideal response is not to care. But I still care.