signs of dying after a stroke in old age

Can some one please help my mother has had a stroke she is 92 has a nose peg in and there is a white mucas foamy !! swollen tongue she looks and sounds like she is choking. She has a caugh . is on a drip and bloodpressure machine. she can hardly see has no speach and her skin looks yellow, she is passing very little urine which is pale in colour her hands are cold but not her feet.

She is my godmother and has brought me up , we are not blood related !! I have cared and looked after her for 30 years I do not go on holiday with my husband because i am worried about leaving her and after work for the last 10 years i have been awoken in the early hours every night and have had to drive 5 miles to reasure her that she is okay. I do her house work washinng and take her to any appointments I have cooked her dinners every day for 10 years and so on. Plus I work fulltime and look like a zombie most days. My husband also has leukemia and I care for him.

But her niece who has done nothing and has just came on the seen as been granted POA ! within 2 weeks based on my godmothers mental status. And has demanded that the hospital do not inform me off her health ! She has told them to ban me from visiting and so on.

She is her exectutive to my godmothers will. with what she is doing is going against my godmothers wishes, Her and her husband have virtually cleared her home out and changed the locks on my godmothers home. Why I dont know. I know I am the main beneficiary off her estate also my son. But her estate means nothing to me as I love my mum? Godmother. Her niece has been left a small portion.

Can someone please tell me these signs though I have asked if my godmother is in end of life care now in the stroke ward. the nursing staff are lovely and are only doing there job and I do not blame them as they are following data protection rules. But I love my godmother and need to know so I am not worrying anymore and can let her go knowing she will be at peace !

I am not sleeping and cannot stop crying as I cannot believe a blood relative of my godmother can be so cruel, especially when its been me and my family put out all these years

and she and her family have had a quiet life. I need to know the truth.

6 Replies

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  • Sadielouise I'm so sorry this is happening to you and your family. I would think its illegal to take stuff from the estate before the will has been probated. Talk to an attorney. Tell her you will prosecute her if she doesn't lift the ban and let you know how she is. This hardly seems fair to you and your family and to your godmother . I'm sure she misses you. I don't know what her symptoms mean. Good luck my friend. Don't take this sitting down . Go after what you feel is the right thing to do.

  • Dear Sadie, if you live close to the hospital, drop in and ask for information, as a godchild and only carer you should be entitled to know how she is, and i didn't know a POA could stop you from seeing your Godmother, i thought they just looked after the will? Hints on both of those? ask a lawyer they may be some one that can tell you over the phone from legal aid about your rights! i think she must be close to the end considering the relatives have cleaned her house out, so don't delay, and remember she will have memories of your kindness not her niece. take care.

  • POA is for finance and occasionally for medical providing the relative has not been badgered into it. Having said that in cases of dementia it can be different. The way I look at it is that you can live with yourself knowing you have done your best and that you care. As far as your godmother's symptoms are concerned it does sound as if she is near the end. Her relatives would not know how much you have done because they weren't around to see. But Ultimately you weren't doing it for anything other than love. I can't see how she can ban you from visiting and you should be able to get free legal aid-ask at the CAB as they are very helpful. Best wishes and try to be strong.x

  • Thankyou for the advice and information you have given. I have been to the hospital 2 nite and they have now stopped her regular medication and only giving her pain medication now. Her urine is very weak in colour and she has a rattle a nurse who i have not seen before has told me that the rattle is down to her chest infection .I asked if she was dying and she told me yes, I was very sad but feel relieved that she is in gods hands now and that my godfather is calling her. I have said my goodbyes 2 nite as I know when the hospital call her niece to come in as death approaches I will not know. I want to remember my godmother how she was and not now looking so poorly.

    I contacted court of protection 2 day and have logged a complaint in regards to the greedy niece and her husband, They are looking into the POA ! I am seeing my solicitor in 2 days to log a complaint against them and also to the police as I was informed a Executive to a persons will does not take the roll untill that person as died and that any belongings should remain in the persons home and not be moved I can report them for Theft.....

    A mothers love is the most precious gift you can give !! I was blessed to have this by my godmother and godfather . And I gave the same love back which will be with me forever.

  • I can't help think of your husband's need in light of all you do and have done for your beloved godmother. I hope you have been able to get some resolution from the authorities whom you have touched base with. You do deserve consideration for all you have done!

  • Myofascial pain

    summer and alternating day and night temperature increases easily lead to vasospasm, blood pressure fluctuations, it is hypertension, coronary heart disease, myocardial infarction, stroke, etc. disease-prone period. Experts therefore advise against middle-aged friends do care.headache is common in the elderly symptoms appear, usually do not pay attention, always thought that eating tablets painkillers, rest will be better. The experts remind us that many sudden headache is often a precursor to stroke and other serious diseases, or the initial symptoms.

    experts suggest that if there is no clear onset of fever or adjacent organs under the premise of a sudden have a more severe headache, consideration should be given whether there is a more serious disease risks, especially acute cerebral vascular accident and hypertension. Cerebrovascular accident is a common disease in the elderly, including ischemic stroke and hemorrhagic stroke types. According to experts, the elderly due to brain atrophy, decreased body reaction and other reasons, cerebral vascular accident, it does not necessarily manifestations of physical dysfunction or severe headache and nausea, vomiting and other symptoms, many elderly patients are often the first minor headache, location was fixed or diffuse, headache was persistent, and sometimes progressive increase may occur.

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