Said my farewells to Archie : Hi all Well... - PSP Association

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Said my farewells to Archie


Hi all

Well Tuesday I said my final farewell to Archie I gave him the send off with bagpipes that he wanted

All our friends came to the wake but none of his family did cause they thought I was wrong in what I did with funeral arrangements and to be truthful I wasn’t all bothered seeing that I can count on one hand over 2 years when he became house bound

I’m glad to say good riddens to bad rubbish

I’m now trying to adjust without people in my home 24/7

I would like to say that I thank everybody on here with help and support you have given .you all do a sterling job of care to whoever you look after . I know things can be very very trying but take my chimney to let the steam out which I always found useful

I’m still going to come on here to see how your all doing cause you don’t get rid of me that easy lol

Love hugs and kisses to you all

Sue xx

46 Replies

Bless you Sue, I’m pleased the funeral was ok and to your wishes!

Screw people that don’t visit! They know nothing of the stress you both experienced so sod em!

I’m pleased you’ll still be around, your a useful lifeline to us all and we enjoy your company!

Big hugs my lovely x ❤️

Suebatt in reply to Satt2015

Thank you Amanda

That what I think about them and I will be sticking my nose in to read posts lol like I normally do

Hope all is well with you and your family


Sue xx

Hello Sue. You did right for him. Here's a Yorkshire hug. See you on 26th at Leeds meet up? Peter.

Suebatt in reply to toyota11

Cheers for that Peter I’m yorkshire too

Where in Leeds is the meet up

Sue xx

Pantopete in reply to Suebatt

Scarborough Hotel near station at noon. Peter

Hope to see you there sue ,pleased the funeral went well .going to put apost on about the Leeds meet now xx

Nice to know you'll still be there for us when we need advice, it's a comfort knowing others can be replied on to come up with answers quickly, .. hope things go smoothly for you now , you deserve some relaxing days now ...Brenda xx

Suebatt in reply to Brenive

Thank you Brenda I will always try and help if I can

Yeah I’ve come down to Cambridge with my grandson for a few days and I must admit that it’s very strange as I’ve not been out really for best part of a year so taking things slowly

Sue xx

Sue so happy the funeral went well, sounds amazing bagpipes how wonderful. Family for you, it’s as they say you can pick your friends but you can’t pick your family. There loss if they didn’t visit for over 2 years, they sound like they are a waste of time. You did well for Archie he would of been proud of his send off, you are a amazing lady Sue, you looked after Archie so well. Sending you a big hug, so happy you are going to stay with us. Yvonne xxxx

Thank you Yvonne

So true that you can’t pick family .i have erased them all now as I say you have to get rid of rubbish

Hope all well with you and just remember to have a great break you so deserve it and George will be fine

Hugs and kisses to you

Sue xx

Thank you Sue, you look after yourself lovely lady xxxxx

Well done, Sue. Bagpipes sound great to me !

Always amazed at how some family react. Chris " beloved sister " never rang or visited but then told me how she thought about him every day !

I thought how lucky for him that we were not all like her !!!

Glad to hear you are staying with us " old guard ". We will survive.

Lots of love from Jean xx

Suebatt in reply to doglington

Thank you jean

And of course I am staying on here I wouldn’t go as I might not need anymore advice on that crappy illness but I can always put some input if I can


Sue xx

Morning Sue, I said goodbye to my darling Leon yesterday morning at 8.30 a.m.16.06.2018. when he took his last breath. No frills, no bells and whistles, funeral for us. Simple cremation, then lots of celebrations as I continue my journey around Australia without him in the flesh, but still in my heart. Love and hugs to you and all the support from this group Marg Halliday Howlong N,S.W. Australia xoxo

Suebatt in reply to margh2468

Thank you marg

And sorry to hear your loss too and hope you enjoy your trip with Leon silently in your heart

Hugs and kisses

Sue xx

margh2468 in reply to Suebatt

Thank you Sue. This site is amazing, will most likely never meet anyone on it, but so so supportive. xxoo

Suebatt in reply to margh2468

👍 so very true xx

doglington in reply to margh2468

We always carry them in our heart. Its strange to know that we would not recognise our friends here !

love from Jean xx

crab2093 in reply to margh2468

Hey Margh. We are all with you. I am in Townsville with Ch. Sounds like our kind of farewell. If you're coming this way let us know, Take care ... Val

Glad your service went well Sue, and very glad you will stay on and check in :-). From what I can tell the Survivors have so much to offer each other adjusting to the new normal of life without the loved one, as well as advice for us still struggling.

Take care of yourself now - spare no luxury!!


Anne G

Suebatt in reply to raincitygirl

Thank you Anne



You gave Archie the send off he wanted and that is all the matters. You cared 24/7 and that is not easy I know. Take care. Jxx

Suebatt in reply to Zeberdee

Cheers j

Take care yourself

Sue xx

Hello Sue

Your care for Archie was great. It must be extra tough going from flat out to an empty house.

Commiserations. I wish you healing in time.




Suebatt in reply to Kevin_1

Thank you Kevin so much

You take care and Liz too



Hi Sue, glad the funeral went the way you and Archie wanted it to. It's so, so important to have that final memory that you did everything right. Sod his family, I have people like that around as well. Thankfully, they come near me, as much as they did when Steve was ill. Never!!!

Now it's your turn. Take it very easy. Getting over the physical toll of caring, takes a lot of time. Much less come to terms with his passing. It has just as many ups and downs, as life with PSP. For a while, it really is day to day, even, minute to minute. Only now, 18 months on, can I honestly say, life will go on and I am looking forward, but to what, that I can't answer yet.

Please know, that we are still here for you, us survivors, as AnneG has said. Or the Old Guard, according to Jean! There is something still that others do not get, about greiving after PSP. To me, a loss is a loss, but I know from the group of widows, I belong to, they seem to react differently to me, after I tell my story.

Of course, there is always the knowledge, you learnt the hard way, that needs to be past to everyone else. We all have a duty to help others, as people helped us, in the beginning of our journey.

We are all in this together, no matter what part of the journey you are on. If you are new to this site and reading for the first time. Don't be frightened about the future, know you have found a place that will get you through today.

Sending big hug Sue and much love

Lots of love


doglington in reply to Heady

I think we Old Guard have been toughened by the long haul we've endured.

I remember long ago, Anne, us agreeing at how we had learned to be able to fight for our loved one and finding new aspects of our personality - not all of which we liked ! I think it being a rare disease changes things.

I'm just getting back more energy. Going on a short break to Lisbon with my daughter.

Hope to meet up again. Love Jean xx

Heady in reply to doglington

I remember that Jean. It's very weird, still trying to get to know the new Anne. The inner strength that PSP so kindly showed me I had, is still there. Something I never knew about myself. Certainly got me through some dark days. The bad aspects, well thankfully, they have crawled back into their little hole. Don't need them at the moment. Still I know they are there, should I have the need to fight again!

I'm off to Rome on Wednesday. Have a good time in Lisbon.

Lots of love


Suebatt in reply to Heady

Thank you Anne

We all on here have had to struggle and cope with this crap illness one way or another and I must admit this is the best place to vent or find information out cause most of the so called professionals didn’t know what’s what

I know that this might be silly or heartless but I was prepared for the day he passed it hurt but thankful that he would rest now I won’t say pain free as that was one thing he never suffered with .

I’ve had everything taken away and it ok to walk into his bedroom without having to see the Equipement

Sending hugs and kisses back to you

Sue xx

Heady in reply to Suebatt

That's the first thing I did, was shove all the crap into the spare bedroom. Don't mind his belongings being around me, still have some, but any reminder of PSP, that followed him out the door!

You are not silly or heartless, one thing we all are, is prepared for the end, even if it does come as a shock.

Lots of love


doglington in reply to Suebatt

Same for me !!

Still have plenty of him around anyway.

Love. Jean xx

My deepest hope for you is to receive all the peace and love that true family and friends send your way.

Suebatt in reply to Kmacgamwell

Thank you so much

Sue xx

Hi Sue. It sounds like you gave Archie a wonderful send-off. I will never understand anyone who thinks they have the right to interfere with the next-of-kin's wishes. You did what you knew Archie would want. My husband died of CBD 17 weeks ago and there is plenty to deal with without having to cope with inconsiderate relatives. Take it slowly and accept all the help you are offered. Be kind to yourself and God bless you.


Suebatt in reply to Pentland

Thank you Margaret

I never bowed down to the idiots in 31 years so I wasn’t now

Now it’s my turn to chill and sort myself out and get myself out now and again


Sue xx

Big Hug, Sue, Big Hug. X

Suebatt in reply to Robbo1

Thank you

Same back to you

Sue xx

Sounds a great send off for Archie, it is so childish of relatives to challenge the way you want to say your final farewell and refuse to attend, it seems they really had no right to have any say in the matter if they hadn't even visited him during the latter part of his illness.

I too find it very strange without all the comings and goings of carers, medical people etc and still can't get used to leaving the house when I want to. I am taking things steadily and not overloading myself with seeing people, going out etc. I sometimes like to be alone with my thoughts and try to make some kind of sense of the last four years and hopefully let it it fade into the distance and remember the good times.

Look after yourself Sue.

Love Kate xxx

Suebatt in reply to Katiebow

Thank you Kate

I know what you mean about getting used to things again and going out .When I’m ready I will do things

Sending hugs and kisses

Sue xx

All our love to Kim and Barry Allan xxx

Suebatt in reply to Allan924

Thank you xx

A big hug and courage to go ahead.


Thank you xx

I’m glad to hear you were able to get Archie the send off he wanted. Anyone who can’t accept your doing things your way is, well, not worth wasting time/energy on! Especially if they weren’t on the front line or any soorce of support for either of you. I’m on day12 without my mom, and it’s a big hole to fill. I hope you find calm and strength in whatever helps you begin to approach your Archie-sized void.

All best!


Sorry for your loss Sue. What a lovely send off !


Suebatt in reply to Hidden

Thank u Betsy

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