Can anyone help with advice or anything on this one, my husband is going through another dementia episode at the moment, and it has been

going on for nearly 3 hours. He is refusing to eat, drink or anything, he will not let me help him, he is just trying to wheel himself around the flat, moaning and groaning.

He has had his daily Mirtazapine 30 mgs, which hopefully, will eventually calm him so that I can get him I to bed.

But what do I do then? How can I help him? I am at my wits end.

Tomorrow the pyscogeriatrician is coming on a scheduled visit to review my husbands case, but tomorrow he will probably be like a pussy cat and say "fine" when he is asked how he is, as he always does! And I am left feeling like the big bad cat for daring to tell them I cannot cope.

Has anyone else got any experience of this behaviour?


Dorothy T

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8 Replies

  • Hi Dorothy

    I have used my "android pad" to video my wife when she is coughing/choking on liquids or saliva, to show the speech and swallowing therapist. When she attends the speech therapist she is given a small glass of water to drink and never coughs/chokes at that time, so my video is visual evidence of what happens at home.

    It sound like spying when making a video of his actions (if he doesn't know), but I wonder if the same thing would be useful for your psychogeriatrician? This suggestion may be too intrusive for you (and for your husband), but PSP sufferers, like my wife, often say "I'm all right" in front of medical people.


  • Hi Strelly, thanks, that's just what my son has said, now got to understand the technology.

    Will blog again after the pyscogeriatrician has been.

    Dorothy T

  • Dorothy, I did just what Shelly recommended, I taped him during one of his angry outburst and sent it to his doctor-she was shocked. He is always so cordial and smiling to his therapists and doctors and then loses it on me. It helps to have "evidence". Hope the dr. visit goes ok. Take care JG

  • Dear Goldcap

    Just a quick update on things. My husband has been seen by the pyscogeriatrician and on the whole it has been a very positive experience, far more visits to the neurologist. We also get scheduled visits from the care coordinator who is a wonderful sounding block for me and is also a shaker and mover.

    The doctor thinks that Harry may now have frontalobal dementia and has explained that this could be a stage and the effects will lessen in time.

    Harry still has his dementia or challenging moments, the prescribed medicines are slow to re-act in the beginning of an episode, so I usually ride out the storm, leave him alone and he calms down eventually. Mind you, it has been known to last from 15 minutes to 4 or 5 hours.

    Take care

    Dorothy t

  • My dad's the other way around.. he tells our relatives that we're not taking care of him but we take care of him full time. Sighs..

  • Oh Dorothy, that sounds so awful. I hope the visit from the geriatrician is some help. Sometimes I think tranquilizer guns should be issued to caregivers for circumstances like yours. Take care of yourself, Easterncedar

  • many confirmations of YES!!!!!!! to the nth degree of this confabulatory behavior can I send to this site?!!? ;)

  • Mum went through a few dementia episodes, not too far apart, where she would go back in time and talk about dad and her own parents as if they were still alive. She talked about going home, so to get an idea of how far back she was going, I asked "'where's home?" She mentioned the name of the road where she was born in 1931. She could be very obstinate, stubborn and awkward during these periods too, but she had been like that for as far back as I can remember so didn't seem connected at the time. I didn't know what to do so let it run it's course. I didn't correct her so as not to cause confusion or agitation. It is really difficult and I feel for you Dorothy. Hope these episodes don't last too long

    Best wishes


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