Cancer-free for 28 months.

[Homegarden]

Now that my life is settling in to the new reality of ED and minor leakage so what will be next. I experienced bad incontinence until surgery in Feb 2018 to install the AMS 800 artificial urinary sphincter which has given me my life back after wearing depends for 18 months. My husband for nearly 25 years jokingly calls me "3 balls" since the release to pee is in my scrotum. I can still have minor leakage if I twist or turn a certain way, but wearing just a liner is far better that depends underwear. I am hoping that with more weight loss that this will improve. ED will be the focus going forward, I have Viagra samples to try but they haven't worked yet. I see my urologist again for an update in a couple more months and he mentioned other options are available to try. I am beginning to think that oh well at nearly 60 years of age I had fun when I was younger and my husband and I had a lot of fun when we met 25 years ago so this will become our new reality and stressing over it won't help. I have read many posts here and they have helped me know that they are many gay men dealing with this reality and it has been helpful and thanks everyone for your comments and information. Leaving in a small city there is not much support here. There is a group here but I have never gone to a meeting as the reality would be a group of mostly men and their wives. Thanks for listening everyone.

[Handdrummer777]

Hi Homegarden -- Thx for sharing your story. Glad the AMS 800 is such a help! So your prostatectomy was in late 2017. It must be a drag that the ED is persisting for 18 months. It's perplexing that penile recovery times can vary so much. Did you get any advice for post-surgery penile rehab? Because of course the concern is avoiding penile atrophy as much as you can.

I'm so glad you have a loving partner so help you through this. And I think you should get out of thinking "I've had my fun..." I'm 68, had radiation last fall, and am on ADT through this year, and my girlfriend reassures me and is a big help.

ADT is quite a serious foe of sexual functioning, while it's helping to save your life. The vast majority of men going through it -- because their libido can vanish, and penile efforts can drastically slow or stop -- can lose the greater part of their sexual function, which is scary.

I've been able to avoid succumbing to that scenario with a simple tool, which I call the JoyLoop or just the Loop. I've been freely offering instructions for making it to any guy in this group -- and to the other healthunlocked group -- who's interested. It may help your ED -- to what degree I don't know. You can give me an email address in a private message if you like, or you can look for the link provided by ctarleton in the reply threads down aways under my initial post titled "A Big Hello to Everyone..."

This is a wonderful supportive group. Welcome!

[Handdrummer777 in reply to Handdrummer777]

Even though I'm in a straight relationship, I had some positive gay experiences in my randy 20's, so I feel comfortable interacting with gay men in this often trying situation.

[Tall_Allen]

Malecare is running a clinical trial for gay men with ED. You get drugs and pumps for free and get paid to participate. You can live anywhere. Go to this site to get info:

malecare.org/restore

[Homegarden in reply to Tall_Allen]

Thank you for the information, but I am Canadian so I don't think I am eligible.

[Cubbiesfan]

The lilies are beautiful!

[healthy1234]

Handdrummer777 , I don't want this to sound disrespectful however it sounds like your using this site to sell your joy loop and you are preying on vulnerable men to market it to. Lately you have made several post referring to this loop and how one can go to a site to purchase it. If I'm wrong then I apologize . This site has been a great coomunication vehicle for sharing I don't want to see it become a marketing platform .....

Thanks

[spencoid2 in reply to healthy1234]

I checked out the joyloop and as far as i can tell it is not for sale. it is just instructions for using a loop of cord. i can't imagine how one would sell it unless to someone in a place where string is not available i tried it and it did not do anything for me.