30 weeks pregnant, Mum to an active 3yr old.....still lots to do, tired and emotional!

[Louloubenn]

Well from having a really lovely 2nd trimester, feeling fantastic, lots of energies and lots of smiles; I have now hit the 3rd trimester with a bump!! Suddenly becoming very tired, having emotional mood swings, finding my dd's tantrums too much to handle and feeling guilty that I am not coping! (Phew, it feels better just to write that all down.)

I know I need to look after myself better to try and keep check on my emotional outbursts but it is not always possible when you have a little one already, still lots to do on the house and not many friends close by to share that cuppa and a chat! All my dear friends live miles away; usually not a problem when I don't get so warn out from driving around.

Each morning for the past week I am waking up thinking "right, I really need to keep calm today and just get through the day" but then my little one will have a major meltdown and I end up being reduced to tears. Feeling guilty that my emotional outbursts are having an effort on my DD learning how to deal with her emotions.

I have suffered from depression in the past, 10 years ago, and also suffered with PND a year after my DD was born. I had counselling when I came off the tablets, last year, and definitely helped. I think that it is my answer! I need to contact my counsellor again to help me get through these last weeks.

How does everyone else handle the hormonal mood swings?

xx

[Preggers304]

You are very brave to share your story. Wow I had the same experience as u with my two chn (now 12 and 14). I can totally understand your frustration. Right, the answer, for me meeting a network of mothers in my area was crucial. Like u said its about having that cuppa with a moan/gossip/laugh etc. For me I needed adult company as well as the chn. Have u looked up local parent and toddler groups in your area. I have some pretty good ones near me, these groups offer u the chance to meet other mothers/childminders and share experiences. Some also arrange social evenings and events for adults only which is nice. Ensure you see your doc regarding your feelings too. I am currently preg with 3rd, also anxious about being at home alone again and feeling guilty about missing work. Good luck darling I hope all turns out ok for you.

[Louloubenn in reply to Preggers304]

Thank you Preggers304 for taking the time to reply to my post. After writing it all down and reading the replies, I felt loads better I have refocused and am back on track and not giving myself such a hardtime. Positive thinking is definitely key and not focusing on the negative. I am usually very busy and do get out the house frequently - toddler groups, volunteering for NCT etc. All of which took time to get set up but it has definitely lifted my mood. After writing my blog post I also booked an appointment to see my counsellor but have since cancelled as am feeling fine. I know she is always there if the low moods/mood swings come back too often!!

Wishing you all the best with your 3rd.....I am sure you will be fine as it sounds like you recognise the symptoms if you are not. Take care xx

[mcairns80]

Hope you don't mind me posting here but your situation is the mirror image of what I'm going through too and don't have a clue where to go next.

I'm 32 wks pregnant with my second & my LO will be 3 in a few wks time, she's just a nightmare. Screams & shouts for no reason, just a typical toddler really but she upsets me so much that my blood pressure is higher than normal. My husband works long shifts so doesn't see what I have to put up with. He's another one who's getting to me too, won't talk, doesn't seem excited about baby arriving soon, moans if I ask him to do something around the house to help me out. Will complain to his mates that I'm constantly harassing him but will say the total opposite to me when I try talk to him.

I'm completely worn out & sore & don't have my close friends & family around me so don't know who to turn to.

How much I hate seeing other people gong through this similar situation I am so pleased to see someone else who is like me.

I don't have any answers but would like to see what others recommend.

I do hope you get somewhere yourself and can see some glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel xxx

[Louloubenn in reply to mcairns80]

mcairns80 Sorry to hear you have been down too. It does get better, our hormones have lots to answer for and it doesn't help when you are worn out from running after your toddler too. The advice from the other two posts is good advice, getting out as much as possible really helps to lift the mood. Does your toddler go to nursery/preschool? If so, put your feet up when she does!

It must be so difficult when your husband is working long hours as it sounds like you need a helping hand. I have always been a slave to my hormones/emotions for one reason or another and I know if I over do it then I pay the price. There is help out there but you need to find it.....have you spoken to your doctor/midwife about how you feeling? I really feel for you and hope things improve and that you have more good days than bad. Good luck hun! xx

[Megzey]

Get on the internet and search for local mother toddler groups. The group round where I live I wasn't to fussed on as they were very clickey with each other so I searched on the internet other groups and drove to a few other groups and meet a few other mums that are all in the same situation and I am really good friends with now. They are only cheap and you can join in a group in any area. It will tire your little one out and give her a change of scenery.

When I was pregnant with my 2nd towards the end I was so tired and all I seemed to do after I finish work and picked my little boy up from nursery was lie on the sofa while he watched cartoons. You feel awful don't you for not having the energy to get them out.

[Louloubenn]

Megzey,

Thank you to you for posting too! So nice to read people's replies. You definitely do feel guilty when you are warn out and your toddler is saying "Mummy, Mummy play with me!!" I have worked out that at the moment every couple of days I need to put my feet up to recharge my batteries then it is easier to keep up with my daughter. She has been an absolute dream since I wrote my blog post! Think the reward chart helped!

Take care x