And because of lack of support I couldnt feed them as much . And I was so ill with my preeclampsia I just managed to give them twice a day feed and their formula . I was in tears everyday and still am . But now suddenly my son doesn’t want to breast feed and my daughter I not dining as much . They are 2.8 months as per their gestation period . But they are 3.8 as per their birth dates .
But now I still don’t have much help but I have realised that it is good for the babies and I do want to breast feed them . What do I do ? I am still in this dire situation with no help but my feeling for them are far more than what I’m going through . Is it still possible to breast feed them. Please any pointers would be great .
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I have been told that you can do it. It is hard and not pleasant for either you or the babies. But if you only offer them breastmilk then it will work. However i would personally not want to do this, and if I did, only at certain meal times to begin with. Hopefully a lactation expert on here can help. Also, your mudwife may be able to put you in touch with someone for advice. Good luck. It is such am emotional time xx
Yes I’m looking for sine guidance from some lactation experts . Yes I know we had a chat about this . But it’s just I feel that I’m giving up easily so I just want to make sure if not I will have to accept and move on . My midwife I don’t know she’s the one who’s reluctant I don’t why from the very beginning. I have asked fir the lactation guide email but she’s not giving me I don’t know why ?
Because milk is supply and demand the less they are feeding from you the less milk you'll produce, but it doesn't mean that you can't change this and produce more.
I would definitely look for some professional lactation advice maybe you have a la leche league somewhere who could offer some advice.
My advice would be to do lots of skin to skin with babies and let them latch as much as you can and get them to up your supply, maybe only offer a bottle if after feeding from you they're not full up, pace feed your bottles so they do get a bottle preference, pace feeding them slows right down how they take the milk as they can drink very quickly and easily from a bottle and then don't want to put in the work to breastfeed.
Have a look at feeding cues so that you can put them to breast as soon as they look hungry a don't wait for them to cry with hunger as then latching is going to be harder.
You could also if you have any time try expressing your milk to build up your supply and babies could have your milk on the bottle too?
Don't panic or stress if you end up given them a few bottles of formula if it's makes babies and your lives easier, stress is the biggest reason why mums don't make lots of milk as you need the loved up relaxed hormone Oxytocin to get your production up.
Good luck, you're doing amazing already to have got this far xx
Aah thanks for all the advices I would try to implement those aS well . I’m pace feeding from the beginning as they had reflux . I see cues . I will look it up
First of all a big hug 🤗. Your are doing an amazing job in this pandemic situation. Give yourself a pat on your back for your not giving up spirit. I was in the same boat as you regarding breastfeeding. My baby is going to be 3 months old and had a lot of struggles with breastfeeding. I wanted to exclusively BF and now I have accepted that it will not happen and I am at peace with my body and mind. As everyone says don’t stress yourself too much as that is the main reason for us not to produce enough milk. The more I stressed about BF I was not able to enjoy my newborn. I am mix feeding my baby with Formula and expressed milk. I had tried everything from expressing every 2-3 hours , pacefeeding , putting the baby on the breast first before giving Formula .I even ate supplements to increase my milk supply and ended up giving an upset tummy to the baby and made her reflux worse. If your babies are happy to have bottle and if you can express then they will still have your milk. Don’t worry about giving them Formula. Even one feed of your milk is good . What I have realised is the more you worry the more you will be affected mentally and your stress will be felt by them. Fed babies are better as my HV told. I do know I have not given you the advice you are looking for but just wanted to tell you don’t take it hard on yourself. Best wishes.
Thanks so much whataname . I hear u my dear but the person inside me doesn’t want to give up as yet . I totally understand. I will try my best and then if doesn’t work I’ll have no regrets just like you x
I’m so sorry you have been having these difficulties. It must be very upsetting. I do not have experience of overcoming this type of breastfeeding issue but in the absence of a lactation expert answer so far -though I am not a professional expert - I’d like to reply in case I can identify anything that may help you. A few thoughts to start with:
How often do you offer to nurse / your babies ask to nurse? The answer above that you need to offer only breast milk makes complete sense because if you follow a breast feed with formula milk, the baby will be fuller for longer and with harder/slower to digest milk, meaning they don’t return to the breast as quickly as they would if they had only had a breast feed. This is very likely to reduce your milk supply because the next feed is not being removed from the breast at the time it would have been if the baby had not had a formula top-up following its previous feed. When a feed is not removed at the time a baby would next be hungry for it, the concentration of FIL, feedback inhibitor of lactation, increases, and this reduces supply. Supply can be increased again by efficient removal (at the optimal frequency and volume for this. The optimal frequency will vary from one mother. Women vary in their capacity to store milk so some women will need to nurse more frequently than others, in order to maintain supply. I definitely fell into this category with my daughter who fed around every 2 hours, day and night. Post-breastfeeding I am a 32C - and must have been a bit larger during breastfeeding - but my chest is on the smaller side, and once full it is important to empty soon or FIL will become concentrated and production reduced. At night it is particularly important not to lengthen the gap between feeds, as exhausting as this can be, because the decision to keep up night feeds or not could make or break the supply. Also at night prolactin levels are higher, so night feeds could further help improve your supply in addition to sustaining it. If you are physically in a position to be able to nurse at night, either by getting up to feed or by nursing safely from your bed (I got up to feed in the same room from 0-9 months then bed-shared safely after this) then if I could say to you in person and encourage you that you can do this, I would.
A couple of other thoughts are just to check you are drinking enough water and eating enough - I found I needed to eat a fourth meal a day (on top of grazing/snacks!) -I would have the equivalent of a bowl of cereal during the night time. As your body needs*a lot*of energy and water to make milk. I learnt this first from working with dairy cows! Though they make even more milk proportionately than we do!!
If you continue to have issues with breastfeeding refusal, express milk frequently in the mean time, i would say including at night, in order to maintain and improve your milk supply. Unless it particularly works for you, I would suggest one or not more than two expresses during the night as well as before bed and after waking in the morning, as opposed to the 4 or more that a baby may require in the night if they are feeding every 1-3 hours like mine was!! Perhaps you already have a good pump but if not get an excellent electric pump not the manual type, which I found a huge difference between! For me it was the difference between being able to express milk or not. If it is hard to express try to distract and relax yourself at the same time with a good book or other media, which I always needed to do. I expressed at work once a day to help maintain supply when I returned to work and also to provide milk for my daughter at her childminder’s when she was a year old.
Another thought is to check the latch is correct, especially for your son if he is giving up? Check for tongue-tie and a successful latch in general. This link includes a lot of about correct attachment - towards the end of the chapter. There is also a lot more of use in this chapter too including how to check your oxytocin reflex.
Also this page from lll gives info on relactation or building milk supply, including to feed expressed milk or supplements from a cup or at-breast supplementer, and to put the baby to the breast for comfort instead of giving a dummy wherever possible because this will increase supply (and I can confirm this from my own experience because this is what I did without ever introducing a dummy).
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