Is anyone's mental health deteriorating since coronavirus?

[Positive2022]

Mine is ☹️

I'm finding the social distancing so very hard on my mental well being. Obviously doing what I can to keep busy and give myself lots of distractions but no matter what I do I feel i'm slowly going downhill. I was improving with help until all this started and now with everything on hold, I can feel i'm sinking. Hard to explain to loved ones, wish I could just 'shake off' post natal depression but I can't. It's such a cruel illness.

Briefly spoke with GP today. I find such personal things so hard to explain over the phone but ended up requesting to increase my antidepressants. Now I feel like i've gone backwards, like i've failed myself somehow. Never in my life have I ever had to rely on medication but i'm trying to do what I can to keep myself fit and well. I hope i've done the right thing as now i'm on them, it feels impossible to stop them.

Sorry for the post. I didn't know where else to write things down and you have all been like my second family. Feel I really need to get things off my chest as the guilt of what's happened to me is killing me 😥

Sending love and BIG hugs to each and everyone of you ❤️💕❤️

[Prosopon]

Mine is. I'm a first time mum and my baby is 12 weeks old. I'd been taking him out every day for my own sanity, and seeing my family often. Now I can't do that and I'm really struggling! I'm heartbroken that my family can't see him and can't stop thinking about that. I'm also so worried about the impact this will all have on my son's development if he can't experience new environments or interact with different people. I feel so down and my anxiety is through the roof. My sleep is suddenly bad too.

I don't think you should feel bad for increasing your medication. You need to do what you need to do to get through this awful, crazy situation. I'm sure lots of people have had to increase their medication recently. Maybe try to think what you would say to a friend in the same situation, then say that to yourself? And keep posting on here if it helps. Fingers crossed we can all get back to normal soon.

[gillyl in reply to Prosopon]

Ditto, my son is 9 weeks old. I had so many plans of what we could do (baby massage class, swimming etc) whilst I was on maternity leave but now it's all out of the window. I spoke to one of my friends on the phone last night which helped, but it's difficult knowing you can't see anyone for a while

[Positive2022 in reply to gillyl]

Its so hard isn't it, especially when on mat leave and to have all your plans suddenly taken away from you under such extraudinary circumstances is tough. Mentally, i've spiralled downhill so fast. I'm not even sure who to go to for help now as clearly there are much higher priorities. Take care and BIG hugs xxx

[gillyl in reply to Positive2022]

Same to you, stay strong, we can do this xx

[Positive2022 in reply to gillyl]

You too, thanks lovely, the support on here has literally saved me 💪

[Positive2022 in reply to Prosopon]

Thank you so much for your kind words. I'm sorry to hear you're feeling similar. I'm finding the lockdown so tough mentally, I can't see me lasting 3 weeks 😔 take care and BIG hugs

[Supergirl87]

I could have written this post!!! Any help greatly appreciated. I find all the time getting stressed and worry about my parents then when I feel ok I do something and set myself off again 😥

[Positive2022 in reply to Supergirl87]

Me too! It's such a difficult time for so many people but I have definitely taken a battering with what's going on. My sleep is terrible. What is so frustrating is that I felt I was doing so well until all my treatment got put on hold and now I feel as though I am back to square one. Devastated. Take care and BIG hugs xxx

[Positive2022 in reply to Supergirl87]

I've started a diary and trying to give myself things to look forward to. Very tough at the moment but stay strong, we're all here for each other xxx

[Sevy571]

Please don't apologize for sharing! Please don't be guilty. You went through a lot of change in your life and now this is changing everyone's daily life in ways unexpected and overwhelming. What you feel is totally normal. Mind you, I have no kids and am not pregnant, yet 2 days ago I cried uncontrollably at the prospect that maybe we'll not be allowed to go outside for a run. Everyone has their values, their traumas and their triggers, and their own history. Do whatever you need to feel better and happy and most urgently do what you can to take care of yourself and love yourself and the one thing that helps with that is stop the negative talk and self-judging. You "shouldn't be anywhere" nor "doing anything" in "any specific way". Just do what's best for you, with self-kindness and compassion. And keep in touch! personally I've set myself goals - like more exercise - to turn the situation around and see it as an opportunity rather than a restriction. Since last week I'm more active than when in the office because lack of time. So, try and find a way to turn this into an opportunity for you too, it helps a lot. Take care!

[Positive2022 in reply to Sevy571]

Thank you for taking the time to respond. My mental health has taken a huge battering. I find it so hard to communicate how I feel to loved ones and more often then not, prefer not to worry anyone and normally I would just dust myself off and move on. But I can't, just physically unable to see an end in sight to the pain i've been left with after having such a complex and traumatic delivery. Take care and BIG hugs xxx

[Sevy571 in reply to Positive2022]

Take care, I hope everything gets easier and better soon. Warm thoughts to you.

[Positive2022 in reply to Sevy571]

Thank you so much ❤️

[Run_rabbit_run]

I had (and still have) PTSD and anxiety since experiencing a very traumatic delivery/labour and my baby is now 6 months. The physical recovery has been a long and painful one and the mental recovery is still ongoing. What has been getting me through is connecting with others - I suppose with any delivery or most, there is that feeling of not being in control and when it is traumatic, it feels even worse. Now with the global pandemic this heightens the sense of having no control over things that are happening. While I find it extremely helpful to express or talk to others, I appreciate you say you are finding this difficult and that you don’t want to worry anyone. I’m glad you’re able to come on here and talk about it though - I can’t stress enough how important it is to talk and share how you’re feeling. This is crucial when it comes to looking after your overall wellbeing and mental health. I also think that writing in a journal/diary very useful which I’m glad to read that you are practising this too. This can help you navigate your anxious thoughts and general thoughts - what I find with thinking (as an anxious person anyway), is that thoughts can snowball and are harmful when they are catastrophising thoughts. They keep going and going and you don’t get a chance to pin them down and think them through. Writing them down means you can capture them and if you aren’t already doing so, see if you can practise challenging those thoughts with questions and answer each one. Write down what you’re grateful for and ask yourself if any of them have changed because of the virus and will they change after the world improves the control over the virus. What positives are coming out of spending more time with your baby?

I am someone who thrives on going out to classes and meeting other mums and friends and made a conscious effort for my baby to be around other babies and children and be in different environments. Now, most babies and children will not be able to experience that during social distancing and self-isolation. What can you do that is within your control though? I (loosely) timetable reading a variety of books to my baby, vary their physical activity with tummy time, stretches with my baby (lying on their back and gently circling their arms and legs, cycling their legs etc) and play time. I carry her to different rooms in the house and look at things describing them to her, let her touch different materials in the house, and sing to her.

We haven’t seen our families for 3 months as they don’t live locally and now we won’t physically see them for however long these measures are in place (important measures I should add). Instead, we have been having video calls every day - twice a day to her grandparents. It isn’t the same but everyone is in a similar position in staying at home. I would also recommend doing something for you every day too. Whether that is doing some exercise (your baby can watch you and will find this interesting - most of the time my baby does but she gets grumpy after 20 mins depending when I time my exercise which I try and do after a feed), watching a current favourite tv show while you feed baby, listening to an uplifting podcast, putting on make up, preparing a really tasty and healthy meal, whatever it is - do something just for you.

I hope this helps. People tend to take on daily habits to look after their physical wellbeing but we tend to forget daily habits to look after our mental wellbeing too. Those daily habits can be the same as physical and mental wellbeing go hand in hand. While life has changed at the moment because of the virus, there are ways we can adapt. It’s not easy but stay connected with others and keep talking. We are all in this together. Sending you huge hugs. xx

[Positive2022]

Thank you for taking the time to respond and for your kind advice. Your experience sounds similar to mine. I'm so sorry to hear you have had such a rough time too. I also had a traumatic birth following fertility issues / treatment. Ended up with a large postpartum haemorrhage and a poorly healed episiotomy scar needing surgery. Diagnosed with PND and PTSD. All treatment has currently stopped (understandably). What was getting me through was a) knowing I had help planned and treatment scheduled b) getting out and about and c) connecting with others. V lost now these have all been stopped so suddenly. However, I'm wandering if the mirena coil is having an adverse effect too. Had it fitted end of January at the advice of gynae and now wish I hadn't. Thanks again, take care and BIG hugs xxx

[Run_rabbit_run]

Oh Poppy149, wish I could give you a real hug! Is there any way you can receive support or counselling over the phone instead of face-to-face which I know isn’t possible now with staying at home?

I have asked friends to send me messages as videos so I can see their faces and in fact my baby sat up and reacted happily seeing their babies’s faces too. We can try and do Skype calls but as you know it isn’t easy to coordinate if one of our babies is asleep or having a tantrum.

Please know you are not alone and keep talking lovely.