Advice needed : I recently lost my... - Pregnancy and Par...

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Advice needed

BabyChunk profile image
14 Replies

I recently lost my 5 month old child, and only just found out why she passed, I'm not sure who to talk to or where I can go, I cant go to my gp as I have a lot of anger towards them, does anyone know where I can go? Seem to be at a loss atm. Thanks.

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BabyChunk profile image
BabyChunk
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14 Replies
Seb9 profile image
Seb9

I'm very sorry for your loss. I can't begin to even imagine what you're going through.

I've no advice in afraid but the lullaby Trust website has a list of bereavement services and organisations that offer counselling. lullabytrust.org.uk/bereave...

Are you able to register with a different GP in your area if you need them to refer you for counselling?

BabyChunk profile image
BabyChunk in reply toSeb9

I'm in the process of registering with another GP just have a lot going on atm with everything. Thanks for the help

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

I’m so so sorry.

Try Tommy’s, SANDS or Saying Goodbye. They’re all lovely supportive charities. I know Tommy’s and SANDS have phone lines where you can speak to someone.

I can’t imagine what you’re going though. So sorry 😔 xx

BabyChunk profile image
BabyChunk in reply toTugsgirl

Thanks, I'll have to have a look at them xx

LKT1 profile image
LKT1 in reply toBabyChunk

So sorry for your loss. I just wanted to say my friend lost her baby recently and wanted to agree with Tugsgirl as both my friend and her husband have found Tommy’s and SANDS extremely helpful please contact them and thoughts are with you xx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly

I’m truly sorry to hear that and I can’t even imagine the pain you are experiencing on so many levels. You must be going through the worst time of your life. I’m not sure I would be able to offer any help, but I just want you to know that I’m here for you, should you want to chat with someone x

BabyChunk profile image
BabyChunk in reply toFrancyItaly

Thanks! I appreciate that, just hard to discuss things especially when the standard line I get it, just get back to normal now. Xx

Andrea08 profile image
Andrea08

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my daughter at 4months old in 2017 and just felt so lost afterwards and couldn't see any positives in life. I just wanted to be with her. We had a local baby loss charity called 'Little Things & Co', so maybe there is a local group you could contact, we found out about them through our local hospital NICU department. Otherwise SANDS support through affected by baby loss. I'm happy to talk if you just want to msg me, but I'm not a counsellor x

BabyChunk profile image
BabyChunk in reply toAndrea08

Thanks, I'll have to have a look what we have available. It's more ranting I need, I have an inquest coming up and it's all getting on top of me atm. I dont feel I can trust anyone really, not after finding the cause of death out.

Andrea08 profile image
Andrea08 in reply toBabyChunk

Do you want to share what that was? It sounds like you've been left down by gps and or the hospital. I'm sorry it ended this way. My little girl passed away of a twisted bowel and I questioned how that could be missed, we were already living at the hospital, she had all the scans etc but it wasn't picked up. I went over and over and over that day, the days leading up to that day for at least 3-4months afterwards. I took a long time to accept it wasn't my fault and that I should have known something was wrong as her mum. Happy for you to rant to me x

BabyChunk profile image
BabyChunk in reply toAndrea08

Went to the drs because I had to do what was right for me and was told I'm borderline severely depressed but then just sent on my way and to go back in 2 weeks time.

I've been let down by gps and the hospital 10 drs in total let us down. I knew something werent right I took her to see 10 different people regarding the same issues and everyone sent us home and said she was fine. We spent the first 2 months in hospital with her where she had scans ect and all came back clear so we obviously were happy she was ok. But then she had ups and downs I've practically been screaming out for help for 3 months and at the end of it all she died. I've had meeting after her passing but they were all adamant it was sids but we got the cause of death 3 weeks ago and it's the worst outcome we could of imagined. I've just got a lot of anger and a lot of un answered questions.

I am so sorry you had to go through that, I know from my experience it's the worst thing that could happen to anyone. You wouldn't of known, you expect drs to know what they're doing. We're not experts. I hope you have found some peace now though xx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply toAndrea08

So sorry for your loss Andrea 😞💕

Andrea08 profile image
Andrea08 in reply toFrancyItaly

thank you x

Georgielouise profile image
Georgielouise

That is so very sad, you poor thing... I don't have any ideas but just wanted to say I really feel for you - my baby was in intensive care at 4 months and I was terrified of losing him, I was very lucky. I think that is the most awful thing to happen losing your beautiful baby or any child - I hope you find peace and find someone to help you. x

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