Social services

[Sharnhazzis]

I'm so scared atm as I had my son in December and I had ss involved as I am in a methodone script i had him for the 6 weeks he was in hospital and then thay took him straight in to Foster care I'm so scared atm as iv found out I'm pregnant again and don't no weather to tell the ss or wait I'm so close to gett my son bk but scared there going to prolong it now I have another on the way I need some help what to do if anyone has gone through this or got through it please help me as don't no what to do HELPPP X

[MissEd]

Your best off being honest straight away. Well done for working hard to get your son back, must have been so hard for you x

[Kata89]

Be honest and I genuinely hope it all works out for you.

[Mali-jay]

Tell them, it shows maturity and that you are working with them.

I really hope it works out ok for you and your children xx

[Hidden]

I worked within social services (child protection) for 9 years, so speaking from experience of working with many mums in your position.

Although I understand your fears and reservations about saying anything, being honest and up front from the beginning is definitely the best way to go. How it will be perceived by professionals is that you are taking steps to work with them, that you’re prioritising your child and doing things ‘the right way’ because you want things to be different/better.

If it comes out later that you weren’t honest then (rightly or wrongly) it’s human nature for people to say “well if he/she wasn’t honest about this what else didn’t they tell us”. The whole ‘there’s no smoke without fire’ argument kicks in. I imagine you’re trying and want to build up trust with social services so you can continue with the plan to get your first baby home and be allowed to get on with your life in peace once all is well, so being honest will help.

The other part of this is also, whether you tell them now or later you’re still going to have to say something at some point. Might as well get it out of the way so you know where you stand and, hopefully your social worker will help you to put a supportive plan in place. That’s the position I would have taken if I was working with you.

Best of luck

[Sharnhazzis]

Thanks for all ur help I'm gonna have to tell them sooner or later I haven't been to a scan or seen a midwife as so scared to tell anyone I'm gonna see what thay say and I will let u no what was said thanks all xxx

[Hidden in reply to Sharnhazzis]

Be brave. Try to focus more on how anything you do is because you’re looking after your baby (and that includes making sure you’re well and having check ups so everything is ok for baby), rather than the fear. Easier said than done I realise. But it’d be very hard for anyone to argue against you having your child/children with you if you’re showing that you’re doing all the right things to look after them and being honest and open.

This is an opportunity for you to show what you CAN do.