Baby blues and leaving your baby behind at the hospital.

[lou121087]

Hello. So I had an emergency c-section last thursday and baby was fine and she's done amazing things every day. We are still both in hospital as she needs to learn to bottle feed fully and not be tube fed but she's taking her time, and I had to recover. I have been suffering with "baby blues" and cry all the time and now I have this massive anxiety that I'm going home tomorrow and will be leaving her behind. It's bad enough that we've been separated from day one and I can only pop down to see her In between rest and medication. And now being fully away from her having to try and get to her some how as I can't drive is going to be very hard. How do people cope?

[Kempton]

I've not been in this position but just wanted to say it will all get better. The hormones going through you right now will make everything seem so much worse. In a few weeks time this will be a distant memory.

If you can, rely on taxis for the time being. Some hospitals will have a service for those who need so you pay a discount rate. Ask if your hospital offers that. Explain about the driving and c section.

Enjoy the moments you do get with your baby, and rest and recover when you can. You'll have your little girl home soon enough and things will be a whole lot better.

And if you are really struggling emotionally, mention it to midwives at any follow up appointments.

I had the worst baby blues when I should have been enjoying my gorgeous newborn. He was jaundice and lost over 10% of his weight, he wouldn't latch or feed. It was terrifying. But we got through it and now he's this most incredible 1 year old who lights up every moment of my day.

Hold in there! And never feel you can't reach out for help.

[lou121087 in reply to Kempton]

Thank you for your reply. These hormones and roller-coaster of emotions are hard going. They have put me up for some sort of review after 6wks to discuss everything and how I'm feeling and coping. And I have been speaking to the midwives about how I've been feeling and they all say its normal unless I don't want to see my baby or make an effort in myself. I'm also fed up of being in hospital and my partner not being around as hes still in work to save most of his paternity leave for when she comes home. But that's also an issue that we're homeless and the council won't help until she's discharged so we'll have to go to my partners mums for a bit but it messes up with where to register her for the aftercare and who's drs to put her under. It's just incredibly stressful. But I know eventually we will be settled. X

[Lovefood1984]

I didn’t have a C section or have to leave my baby behind in hospital but your emotions are totally normal, I can’t remember how many times I cried and felt like I couldn’t do it (we had a rough start with undiagnosed cows milk intolerance until 8 weeks and she wouldn’t latch so I was pumping and trying to feed too). My daughter is now 5 1/2 months and we’ve had a few other rough patches (trip to A&E at 4 months when she had half formula for 4 days) and I keep telling myself I coped then so I can cope now and it’s so true 😊 Hang in there and keep talking x

[Kiera-Orla]

I had my LG early and she was born with a cleft palate and I could only go down and see her as we wasn't together in hospital I went through the same crying all the time but it will get better. And my baby was feeding through a tube and had to learn to bottle feed with special bottles hope everything gets better for you both soon.

[lou121087 in reply to Kiera-Orla]

Thank you. I go home in a couple of hours but I've managed to hold it together apart from this morning lol and I warned my bf to expect me to be a mess on leaving. But things are slowly coming together she's doing better today with bottles but uses her tube in between feeds depinging on how much sleep she gets to if she'll take a bottle or not. I've luckily organised lifts every day to her and my partner will be around a bit more during the Easter which will bring me more comfort. X