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Want baby but scared of pregnancy

Starry2007 profile image
16 Replies

Hello,

Can anyone share stories about how to calm myself down please? I really want a baby, we are trying to have one (no luck so far) and I even keep having baby thoughts all the time. Yet I’m very scared about the whole process, the pain, becoming huge and the labour process.

Anyone feel the same way?

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Starry2007 profile image
Starry2007
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16 Replies
sakky2 profile image
sakky2

I think everyone has that worry as a first time. Iv had two kids now pregnant again and still have the same fear of labour. You can’t get away from the fact that it will hurt but what should be the main focus is that all that labour pain is the process to see your beautiful baby.

The pregnancy journey is different for every women. But many women go through it and get through it. Even if you do have a hard time it’s worth it for the end result. My last pregnancy was horrendous but here I am again doing it all over again because the end result is worth it. So I would say just relax and don’t worry about the process. Just think about holding your beautiful baby. You will be ok.

I completely agree with sakky2. I’m in my final week and I can’t lie, I’m a little petrified about what lies ahead. I keep thinking about my baby in my arms and that is keeping me very positive and distracted from the painful part! Try not to dwell too much on giving birth part as it’s a small part of the whole process but think about your gorgeous baby.

Also, try and ensure you get to an ante natal class when the time is right. The classes really helped me as you have many choices to make and it’s good to be informed about the process which has made me feel a lot more comfortable.

This forum has also been brilliant for asking questions and receiving helpful advice from women who are experiencing or have recently experienced the same.

Good luck and look after yourself - remember to take folic acid.

Chels976 profile image
Chels976

When I first found out I was pregnant it scared me, it took me weeks to process it all. I couldn’t believe I was pregnant until my first scan. But now I have 12 weeks left until my little boy is due and honestly I can’t wait to have him here and in my arms. Being scared does go eventually I promise we all feel that way in the beginning. But as long as you’ve got a supportive partner and family you will be absolutely fine.

I wish you well with trying xx

Hopful85 profile image
Hopful85

The whole thought of pregnancy scares me lol. I’m 4 months pregnant now and I’m just trying to take every day as it comes and enjoy it. I didn’t tell friends and colleagues until 13/14 weeks as I wanted to get used to the idea of what was happening myself. I’m just starting to show now and it’s scary because it’s so real but it’s so lovely too. So far it’s all worth it nausea and all! 😊

Starry2007 profile image
Starry2007

Thanks for all your comments, ladies. It’s so natural for a woman to carry young but I’m just nervous and scared. Not managed to conceive yet, yesterday I cried for the first time as I was hoping to miss my period and fall pregnant. I’m 34, not that young by biological standards, but should be able to have a child. I wonder if I’m just too worked up.

Are there are meditation classes any of you attended to appease your fears?

in reply toStarry2007

Look into hypnobirthing. I haven’t tried myself but I’ve heard great things about it. It may be just what you need

Womanblessed profile image
Womanblessed in reply toStarry2007

Hi

Maybe it’s not the pregnancy you fear but rather the change to come. Your lunch fee will change of course. Pain is just temporary but the birth of a child is something you don’t want to miss. I recall being afraid of the delivery with my first and ended up with a c-section. Please be peaceful about getting pregnant because anxiety can cause many problems.

Womanblessed profile image
Womanblessed in reply toWomanblessed

Your life will change of course. Sorry for the typo

Yes, it gets real pretty quickly. I’m due tomorrow and feeling a little daunted about what is around the corner!

Look into hypnobirthing. I haven’t tried myself but I’ve heard great things about it. It may be just what you need to feel empowered and in control of your situation.

Starry2007 profile image
Starry2007

Thanks, Pamanham re hypnobirthing tip. I’ll look it up.

My first step is to obviously get pregnant which just isn’t happening right now.

Good luck with your impending labour :) x

Isabella1999 profile image
Isabella1999

You are not alone lovely! Many women feel nervous and scared when they are trying or even throughout their pregnancy. I'm 32 weeks and I've never been more nervous in my life but I know I'm the end it'll all be worth it to see my beautiful girls little face. All the aches and pain and morning sickness and the labor will disappear once you get to hold your baby❤️💙 it's natural to be nervous and scared but I promise, you will be nothing short of a fantastic mum❤️💙

Clairelouise91 profile image
Clairelouise91

Everyone gets nervous or scared especially towards the end but i dont know one person including myself who wouldnt say its an amazing experience. I just always told myself if it was so bad no one would go through it more than once 😂

Clairelouise91 profile image
Clairelouise91

Have you tried taking a ‘break’ from trying the stress of that alone can make it difficult, alot of the time woman concieve when they are most relax and enjoying it rather than just doing it because you ovulating if that makes sense. I stopped ‘trying’ and was pregnant within 4 weeks so its worth a try everyone is different though xx

Starry2007 profile image
Starry2007

Maybe you’re right. Maybe I should relax. The GP is saying the same but I’m getting fertility tests done nonetheless.

Starry2007 profile image
Starry2007

Did you all get pregnant easily or did it take some time?

in reply toStarry2007

It took me about 9 months and like Clairelouise91 suggests, we ended up taking a break. Each month my period came, I got more and more upset so we decided to stop ‘trying’. I made sure I was taking all the correct vitamins (including folic acid), took up swimming & gardening and gave up alcohol. After about 3 months of a break as I wasn’t keen on having a December baby (my personal preference) and when we were ready to try again, I became pregnant pretty quickly. Taking a healthy approach and looking after myself definitely worked.

Good luck!

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