I want a baby

I'm young but I've been wanting a baby for ages what should I do??

[Zoe310798]

How young are you? Are you at school/college? Xx

[Hidden in reply to Zoe310798]

I am in college x

[Zoe310798 in reply to Hidden]

I am 18 with a 2 month old baby, and honestly she is the best thing that's ever happened to me but if I could have waited and had her in another few years until I was in a better position to have a baby i would have done. It is very difficult. Have you thought about the practicalities, where would you live? How would you pay for the things your baby needs? What would you do for work? What about your education?

I know it seems like a fairytale and it seems so great to have a baby, and it is great, but it is in no way easy. I would try to resist the urge as much as possible until you are in a better place to have a baby x

[SimoneSimpson in reply to Zoe310798]

I was 17 when i had my daughter 10 years ago it wasnt easy i was on high school grade 10i had to go work an give up studying further cause i had to sacrifice for her an today im a nurse an she in grade 4 it wasnt easy cause they get sick an doctors appointments an so forth it tiring but rather study an get urself financially stable then u should think of a baby

[roxannacar]

Does your name annna27 mean you're 27? If so i wouldnt think 27 was young to have a baby.

[Hidden in reply to roxannacar]

No I am 16

[roxannacar in reply to Hidden]

Your right you are too young

[ChrisWest1983]

If I was 16 and wanted a baby I would think: Will I want this child after Xmas? Do I know my partner well enough to rise a child with him? Do I own a house? If I don't: does my partner owns a house? Is my and his salary £50+k a year to support a family?

If I would get positive answers then maybe I would go for it, but then again I probably would not as at your age your body probably is not fully developed to grow a child in it, so I would not risk my own health to give a life to a baby. I would wait, get educated, go to all gigs, learn to play guitar, new language & how to paint, visit at least one country in each continent (except Antarctica- though it sounds exciting!), pass a driving test, get a dream job and then would go for a baby.

Good luck!

[roxannacar in reply to ChrisWest1983]

I would add to those questions ... Am I willing to put baby first always... Waking up in the middle of the night even when exhausted. Would I still want to go out dance and have fun till the early hours and sleep in on the weekends.

Children are great but they are really hard work... And I'm saying that despite being 30 (when I had my first) have a husband house good financial position etc etc and I still sometimes find it overwhelming! They are not cuddly toys you can return. They are truly for life and completely dependent on you for several years

[luv2017 in reply to ChrisWest1983]

I like the way you added 'pass a driving test' in your list,..It does plays an important role after failing so many times

[ChrisWest1983 in reply to luv2017]

Good luck next time and try to relax when doing test because stress makes us make mistakes!x

[mrsb2016]

16 is way too young to be having a baby.... I got pregnant with my son when I was 17 and although I love him and wouldn't change him for anything in the world I wish I had waited!! Life is a struggle when you have a child that young. You need to make sure you have your life in order first, get yourself sorted with a job and somewhere to live and make sure the person you are planning to have a child with is the sort of person that will stick around and help. Don't rush into having a baby just because you have wanted one for a while trust me waiting a couple of years will be worth it in the long run

[Kaza44]

I always felt the need for a baby and I'd love to have had one years ago but knew the best way was to wait till Mr Right came along we bought a house and waited till we were both ready. It's the best thing I ever did you're never going to understand this though until either you go out there and rush into it then possibly regret it as there's no way I'd cope alone doing it alone and even if there is someone not all guys will stick around. If you do wait well I always believed good things come to those that wait. Even tho I did wait and spent years watching other people's kids and my niece etc when the time came to have my first when I was 29/30 I felt desperate and now I'm awaiting number two in 3weeks time but it's mega hard work working full time paying bills and giving my kids everything they need even with the most supportive husband in the world as you sometimes feel trapped etc cause you can no longer just drop things and go everything is a military planned event and you have to consider what's right for you're kids 24/7 but I'm glad I waited. The comment of feeling trapped is something only once you become a mum you'll then understand but once it's done it's done you can take it back to the shop!

[Miss_slinky]

I think there have been some great comments above. Having a child is a 24/7/365 responsibility - you can't decide one minute you are fed up of them - they are entirely dependent on you. You need to be financially sorted, mentally and physically ready for it, supported by your partner and family, have a flat/house etc.

I'm 36 and pregnant with my first (ideally I'd have had a child a bit earlier than this but I feel I'm now with the right man, with the right situation etc.). I have LIVED a life and enjoyed my own life before deciding this was the right thing to do. I always knew I wanted children but I either wasn't with the right person or in the right situation to have a child - I thought of the potential child before my wish/desire to have a child. Selfishness can't come into it - you have to think of that little baby over and above anything and everything else in the world and can pretty much forget you for a while! I can now wholeheartedly devote my life to this little one with no regrets. I've got life experience under my belt and feel absolutely ready. I don't think you could honestly say that at 16. What does your boyfriend think?

Why is it that you want a child so much just now? I would think about other things which you can do, things you are interested in and go and pursue them just now. You have all the time in the world. Waiting a few years will only make the experience far better for you and for your baby...

[Ismene84]

I had my daughter (a micropreemie) at 18, although I was out of high school and married to her father, we were much too young. Due to her health (she was hospitalized one year 15x due to pneumonia), I couldn't start college until she was 3 years old, by that time her dad and I were divorced. So i was a 21 year old divorced college student, with a kid, driving 130 miles a day to take her to school AND go to school myself. It was definitely a trial. I'm now 33 with a career, MBA, my own home and pregnant with my second (my current husband's first), my daughter will be 15 in Oct. and I'm nervous all over again. Having a kid is hard work, even for established people.