My wife had our baby girl just over a year ago. She has always had feelings of depression before our child but over the last 6-9 months its got a lot worse. We have had a stressful year for sure. We have moved house 2 times and moved to the other end of the country to be near her parents. She started to get irritable and find things to fight about. She doesn't want to go out if she can avoid it. Her family help out where they can but when they cant help it hits her really hard and i know she thinks that she is stuck in the house. She cant drive and doesn't do secular work so feels trapped.
It took me a long time to come to the realization that she suffers with PND. After a lot of denying that there was anything wrong she finally "snapped" and had a really bad anxiety attack and withdrew in on herself so much that i had to take half days to help look after the baby.We spoke a lot about going to the doctors. She spoke to her mum and agreed to go to the doctors. She had her appointment in July(ish) and they prescribed her medication. It took a long time to start helping and it defiantly is helping even though she cant see it herself.
I'm really worried that the doctors haven't done anything else other then give her pills. As i cant be there for her appointments ive got no idea whats said between the doctor and my wife so I don't know if she is expressing her self to them as much as she does to me. Her family I think are getting frustrated because it appears that she doesn't want to try to help herself. As a man I will never know what it feels like to have PND so i really struggle to understand her even though ive had depression myself in the past.
Could she be doing more for herself? IE making her self go for walks and joining baby groups etc or is it a case that, as she says, she cant do these things?
She is a fantastic Mum and i try to tell her that as often as possible but sometimes I worry a bit that when i'm not there (I work full time 50+ Hours a week) that the baby doesnt get as much attention as she needs. It seems no matter how tactful I feel im being im always in the wrong when im concerned that the baby isn't getting her nappy changed often enough for example.
I'm sorry that ive rambled on a bit but i'm feeling a bit helpless at the moment and really don't know what I can do to support her and help her on her road to recovery. Any advice on how to communicate to her in a way that wont put her on the defensive will be very much appreciated.