Please offer me seat....

[braininjurythepits]

Any other Londoners sporting these badges as they travel on London Transport? I’m wondering how effective they are, and whether it’s worth applying.... not so much for PMR, although standing for an hour an a half the other day was not pleasant, but I have a prolapse as well!

[Blearyeyed]

Sounds like that's a great thing to have , even if people don't respond to it straight away it gives you that extra confidence to show your badge and ask for a seat if you want one , I'd definitely go for it.

[Marijo1951]

As it happens, I worked for Transport for London's Customer Services for 15 years and saw a lot of the debate about whether these badges should be introduced. There seemed to be two schools of thought, especially after the 'Baby on Board' badges were introduced for pregnant women. Some people thought that pregnant women had chosen their condition whereas sick or disabled people had had their conditions thrust upon them, so it was unfair that the pregnant should be favoured in this way. Other people with hidden disabilities didn't want to draw attention to themselves. There was also the difficulty of deciding the wording. They actually introduced them after I left and finally decided on 'Please offer me a seat'. The principle according to TfL is that people should be encouraged to offer seats to 'disabled people and those with invisible impairments, conditions or illnesses' which certainly does include somebody with both PMR and a prolapse. The card that is also sent to applicants (credit card size) says 'Please offer me a seat. Remember not all impairments and conditions are visible', which says a great deal without unnecessary detail. I heard a feature on Women's Hour when they were first introduced and one of the interviewees was a young woman of 24 with lupus. She desperately wanted to continue working and supporting herself, but a bad journey to work could destroy her day.

Although I support the idea in principle and I have a badge and a card, I have never actually used either. I just don't want to draw attention to myself I suppose and I'm too inhibited to sport a bright blue badge or flash a card at somebody. Also on familiar Tube journeys, I tend to know which carriages are likely to be less crowded and in any case, these days I can avoid the rush hours. However several times I have been in a crowded carriage and been offered a seat and once when I was first ill and felt terrible, I asked a young girl if I could have her seat which she gave up willingly. I found out by eavesdropping on her conversation with her friends that she was a medical student at Queen Mary's College, so was tempted to tell her what my conditions were. I don't want future doctors to be as ignorant about GCA and PMR as many current ones are!

[braininjurythepits in reply to Marijo1951]

Thanks Marijo, very interesting to know what went on behind the scenes before the cards were introduced. I too, am doubtful that I would approach someone for their seat, rather hoping that they might spot the badge and offer it to me instead. But I’ve got one on the way to me, and I’ll keep it in my pocket —- just in case!

[Marijo1951 in reply to braininjurythepits]

Actually, despite London Underground's reputation for unfriendly passengers, avoiding eye contact and hogging seats, I think that people are more inclined to offer seats these days than they were in the past. This is a totally unscientific claim only based on my own experience (when I'm not wearing a badge) As I said, I've several times been voluntarily offered a seat. Maybe TfL's approach of gentle persuasion has paid off.

[Arflane97G]

I was thinking about this the other day. I generally try to avoid travelling at peak times but I have in the past been offered a seat , obvs looking rather tired, and a lady approached me the other day while I was lost in a book and asked if I would mind giving her my seat which I did not mind at all and rather admired her for asking but I guess you choose who to ask! On the whole I think Londoners are a good bunch just a bit busy and stressed most of the time so maybe a blue badge is a good visual sign. Have to say even had to take my husband to task the other day - was feeling some Xmas stress - and he said’ but you look so well, I forget you are ill!’

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to Arflane97G]

But since YOU have an invisible illness - was it right for YOU to be asked? The badge would have dealt with that, she would have seen you too needed a seat.

[Marijo1951 in reply to PMRpro]

It's interesting, this point about 'invisible conditions'. When I was working for TfL I did the 'Disability Awareness' course that station staff had to do. This included wearing different glasses that mimicked different types of visual impairment while trying to negotiate St James's Station - I remember the one for loss of central vision was particularly disconcerting. We also had to push one another along Victoria Street in wheelchairs which made me feel very helpless and has left me with a lot of respect for wheelchair users, especially those who manoeuvre themselves along busy streets and on and off buses. However there was also strong emphasis on the fact that many disabilities are invisible, partly to put the fear of God into any staff member who might be tempted to say 'Well, you don't look disabled to me...' - it did happen now and then despite the training. I'm so pleased that they've widened this to talk about 'conditions' which encompasses disabilities, autoimmune conditions like ours and many other types of illness. I'm sure they have also enhanced the staff training to include an awareness of 'conditions' that might not strictly be described as 'disabilities'.

As for the kind of dilemma that PMRpro highlights, I suppose if I'm just too self-conscious to wear a badge or flash a card, it'll be my own fault if a similar thing ever happens to me. However I think I could say 'I'm really sorry but I have a condition that means I also require a seat, but I'm sure there's somebody here who will be happy to oblige'. It would be a rather unlikely scenario that everybody sitting down had an invisible condition.

As for 'looking well' this is one of the 'mixed blessing' side effects of pred. Strangers can't know that, but I think close relatives should remember!

[Arflane97G in reply to PMRpro]

My choice and no need to SHOUT btw

[PMRpro Ambassador]

I was once SO embarrassed to be offered a seat - since I have had PMR to be fair and I have been white for 30-odd years so do tend to look older than I am I suppose. OTOH, I have been on public transport in the UK when I could have done with a seat and no-one hale and hearty offered.

However - carrying a walking stick seems to make a difference and you do get very pretty foldable ones that would fit in a handbag. Also handy for defending your space which I find the biggest problem if I have to stand...

[maria40 in reply to PMRpro]

I agree about the walking stick. Also I find that cars will slow to allow you to cross roads when using a stick.

[braininjurythepits in reply to PMRpro]

I noticed a heavily pregnant woman standing on a crowded train a month or so I go, and I offered her my seat, then thought better of it and suggested to the young lady next to me that she might offer hers, as she was younger than me. She replied that she would usually, but she was also pregnant! Red faces all round, and of course, I had to stand for the rest of the journey! This situation may have found me seated elsewhere if I had been wearing the blue badge perhaps!

[PMRpro Ambassador in reply to braininjurythepits]

Exactly.