The Lighter Side: Serious Warning to You Lot arou... - PMRGCAuk

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The Lighter Side: Serious Warning to You Lot around the Dire Consequences of having Too Much FUN here… ;-)

markbenjamin57 profile image
75 Replies

Greetings to All Polymylingerers and GCA Sufferers, whoever and wherever you are.

As always, it’s a pleasure and privilege to be a part of this caring and thoughtful Health / Social Community. Yes, I’m still here (I can hear the groans of disappointment as I write.. ha ha).

That said, as the forum’s Honorary ‘Uncle’ I must Draw the Official Line on some of the Nonsense that is appearing here again recently. Simply: it has come to my attention that some of You Lot are having far TOO much FUN here (no names mentioned).

Let me explain:

Yes, many of Us Lot quite rightly feel secure and supported in writing heartfelt Posts around our PMR / GCA Journey with all of its Medical and Psychological Trials, Tribulations, Questions and much more besides.

But, despite this, many such impassioned Posts and Pleas for Advice and Support often deteriorate into an unruly Melange of side-discussions around seemingly trivial topics and inane questions ranging from such things as the escalating price of Broccolli in ASDA to which type of Hoover is best, how to assassinate your unhelpful GP (without being discovered), is Brexit just a publicity stunt, how many people can you cram into a Fiat 500 before it collapses, and much more besides. Heaven help us…

All I would say is:

If any of You Lot are Parents (or probably Grandparents?) of young children, you will probably be familiar with the saying that ‘Too much Fun and Excitement.. etc can end in Tears and Tutti-Frutti fuelled Tantrums, with Hysterical outcomes’.

What do I mean by ‘Hysterical Outcomes’? Well, I’ll leave that to your imagination. Only to say that these types of 'Outcomes' are invariably messy - and difficult to clear-up. And that can apply to Us Lot too: especially whilst under the influence of PMR / GCA, Pred-Head, Brain Fog and all that goes with it. Enough said?

So, please, try to control your urges to be TOO SILLY on this Serious Health Forum. Slightly Silly is acceptable. Medium-range Silly is ok-ish (in an appropriately humorous context). But Full Monty Bonkers Silly is plain Dangerous - and can lead to all sorts of repercussions. Be warned…

On the other hand….? ;-)

Best wishes, and try to keep smiling on the PMR / GCA Journey. And.. don’t forget to have some Fun along the way, however you do it. It can help during the Tough Bits, as I well-know ;-) :-D

‘Uncle’ MB

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markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57
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75 Replies
PiersC profile image
PiersC

Better watch out - the thought police are in town. All leave is cancelled until morale improves....... :-))

Hope all is well Mark (you still dabbling in the CPZ range - or having just that little taster every now and then?)

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toPiersC

Greetings Piers - ha! :-D

Not bad here, I confess to sticking at 2mgpd Pred recently during the cold, damp UK weather, to keep some low level symptoms under control. But aiming for PCZ again when things warm up a bit. How about you?

PiersC profile image
PiersC in reply tomarkbenjamin57

Hello again Mark, All good here in the increasingly sunny oz, getting pleasant (when it is not burning us to a crisp). As to the ol' pred - after a period of experimentation that induced a roller coaster of pain/fatigue/confusion I am doing something quite odd for me - following the advice of my rheumy - he seems to be really into the DSNS idea. Told me to reduce by .25mg per fortnight (lots of little bits of pills and pred dust everywhere) and at 2 mg stop reducing and stay on 2 for the silly season. He thinks Christmas is a stressful time (concur) and just stay on that until mid-Jan then start again. So - that is what I am going to do - seems to be working and I am very mobile at the moment - feeling quite free - not much pain - and I am resisting the temptation to reduce (?!?!?!?) - Two it is.....

I am lucky enough to have long service leave coming up (a magnificent Victorian era construct so the 'chaps and chapeses' could have a trip home from the colonies) and I am taking a whole three months off. I am hoping to consolidate the gains I have made (getting to 2mg and being at a low level of pain/fatigue) and see if a break from work could lead to a recovery phase. As always I know that PMR will take whatever path it wants to independently of whatever I want - that is the way of it - but we will see.

Hope the winter is not too hard on all you guys up the top and take care - I dont post too much - but I monitor all the time!!

Piers

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toPiersC

Hi again Piers

I'm quite envious! For years (even long before PMR) I've been saying that I'd ideally like to spend at least part of our often long, dark, cold, windy, and wet UK Winters somewhere warm and sunny. OZ sounds perfect, I just need a Lottery Win and I'll be over like a shot. As for Tedski - I'll sell him on ebay.

Interesting & encouraging wisdom from your Rheumy about tapering / Christmas / additional 'Load' (stress) etc. He sounds like a Gem! And, yep, I'm sure a long, relaxing break from the Day Job will at least help you in the recuperation process. But, as always, Slowly does it... as we both know.

It's always good to compare notes with you as we seem to have a broadly similar PMR context (age, gender etc) and also a similar Pred tapering / recovery trajectory. Can't speak for the Chappesses though! :-D

Here in the UK: yes, people are getting busy ready for the annual Christmas Frenzy and probably looking forward to turning the page for a better 2019. As for Brexit? Better not go there. All I can say is: Ohhhh, you couldn't make it up....! :-D

Good to hear from you as always - look forward to keeping in touch.

MB

stellafmdm profile image
stellafmdm in reply tomarkbenjamin57

I hope Tedski didn't hear what you said about selling him on Ebay! That would encourage all kinds of mischief if he did!!!

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply tostellafmdm

Knowing my luck the only bids I'd get would be to KEEP him.... :-D

JoanJo profile image
JoanJo

Uncle MB-

Humor is a healer for me, no doubt about it, Back in my 30’s (I’m 60 now), upon leaving an abusive relationship of 5 years and having very low self-worth, I stumbled upon the book “I Am Good Enough, I Am Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me: Meditations By Stuart Smalley “ which, upon reading, really lightened the load for how depressed and down-on-myself I felt at that time. It helped me to laugh out loud (till I cried) about serious emotional/ psychological subjects, and basically view these once very overwhelming problems in a different light. Humor helped me to move on, basically!

Thanks to that book, some helpful therapy sessions with a counselor , supportive people and a dog who became my best buddy, I quickly made it back into the land of the living, away from my “stinkin thinkin,” as “Stuart” describes it so well!

I can’t give humor enough credit for keeping me sane —even when still in the throes of that relationship prison. If I hadn’t had friends there to not just commiserate with me, but also point out the absurdity with my husband’s ridiculous demands, and then laugh with me about the situations over a beer, I think I wouldn’t have made it out alive.

So, without laying out my WHOLE life’s story to make a point, I want to send my thanks to you, MarkB, and all of the Aunties and other fantastic people I’ve met on this site, who have rallied behind each of our unique situations/struggles and questions, taken us seriously, provided valuable insights and info, but at the same time, have provided a much-needed levity on our PMR/GCA journeys. Initially I had been extremely downcast and feeling doomed when diagnosed, but thanks to this site, Ive been given a new outlook and plenty of reasons to hope for the future.

“Keep the Humor coming” I say, long-threaded back-and-forth banter included. I do prefer the Full Monty Bonkers Silly, vs Slightly or Medium, though I appreciate all three, whenever they appear. 😁

Fellow Polymalingerer

JoanJo 🤪

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toJoanJo

Greetings Joanjo

I can only try to imagine your experience - all I do know is that a lot of people can't escape from these types of controlling / coercive relationships: and I think there's now a law against it here in the UK. You did well...

I agree, being able to find the funny side of adversity can be a powerful coping mechanism, even if it doesn't fix things. There's some serious research out there along the lines that fun and laughter do in fact supress Stress hormones - and so are good for the Immune System. Enough said?

Funnily enough (excuse the pun), that's exactly why I started writing humorous (allegedly) stuff here at the start of my PMR journey. I just needed to cheer myself up when wiped out with DF (Deathly Fatigue) and facing the fact that I had a chronic illness.

But the best thing was that a few of You Lot joined in with my silly banter (or even upped the ante!) and you probably know the rest of my story. Nice thing is that the Aunties often join-in too - in between their contributions around the more serious stuff here.

As you say: keep the Humour coming - I like a bit of competition! ;-) :-D

MB

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toJoanJo

I prefer the totally mad/stark raving bonkers form of fun as well but that's probably because I fit in at that level. X

Suet3942 profile image
Suet3942 in reply toJoanJo

Well said JoanJo. Youve obviously been through an terrible time. God Bless. 🌸🌸

linda49 profile image
linda49

Full Monty bonkers rules.....ok?

Longtimer profile image
Longtimer in reply tolinda49

Certainly does, I look forward to it!!….espeacially on the hard days....

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply tolinda49

Yep... :-D

Marijo1951 profile image
Marijo1951

We do - strictly speaking - go 'off topic' from time to time (I plead guilty). Certainly it can go too far, but within bounds I think it enhances my experience of this forum as individual contributors come to life as more rounded characters. Each one of us is more than a victim of our current ailments

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toMarijo1951

I know Marijo (going off topic..). It always makes me smile when a Thread starts with one topic (usually serious) and then, somehow, deviates into several other silly ones simultaneously!

But I guess that's one of the nice things about this community - we can have a well deserved giggle at the same time as a usually respectful and thoughtful dialogue around all things PMR and GCA. Long may it continue... :-)

Thanks again Mark. I needed some light reading whilst having my coffee break before the onslaught of my two great grandchildren (1 & 2) for the day, with a little help from their Grandad while my Daughter-in-law and Granddaughter enjoy! a day around the Christmas market. Love it though and I got the better deal? Have a good weekend. D

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply to

Thanks Dot, and you :-)

SheffieldJane profile image
SheffieldJane

But you are the silliest of us all, do admit,

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toSheffieldJane

Ok Jane. Hands up, it's a fair cop. Loitering with intent to be Silly.. Aiding and abetting Silliness... Conspiracy to be Silly. Guilty on all counts M'lud. :-/ :-D

Constance13 profile image
Constance13 in reply tomarkbenjamin57

All true! 🎄🍾🍸

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toConstance13

And, of course: Being Silly Without Due Care and Attention.. Exceeding the Silliness Limit... Failing to stop after being Silly... ? :-D

Sandradsn profile image
Sandradsn

Anyway did I mention our boiler is playing up? Just starting up a side discussion! hahaha.OH is slightly panicking but as I have a proper pred head today I'm just shrugging it off and eating a chocolate mini roll (M&S ones are amazing)

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toSandradsn

NO MORE IRRELEVANT SIDE-DISCUSSIONS PLEASE SANDRA!!!

Only joking... sometimes these are more entertaining than the main topic ;-) :-D

Don't mention M&S chocolate mini rolls - Tedski's mouth is watering at just the thought. Better give him another shot of Vodka to shut him up? ;-/

Keep smiling..

:-)

Sandradsn profile image
Sandradsn in reply tomarkbenjamin57

🐻🤣😂

SheffieldJane profile image
SheffieldJane in reply toSandradsn

Oh no not at Christmas! Those chocolate mini rolls are amazing. I love that you are escaping from the boiler worry and laughing in the face of the type 2 Diabetes worry.

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toSandradsn

Their jam doughnuts are the best!

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell

Sometimes the silly things we talk about on the site are what actually stops us from curling up in a ball and sobbing. I admit freely that I often go off subject when appropriate and if something that happens in my own little mad house makes someone else smile or god forbid laugh then I am happy. Yes we are all down about our day to day dealings with pmr/gca and the support from others going through the same is vitally important and for many on their own it is the only support they have. Even with my OH on my side I desperately need support from this group.

Going off subject briefly does anyone know what to do with the 4 kilo of carrots I ordered online by mistake?!!!

Keep the laughter coming. Yellowbluebellxx

Sandradsn profile image
Sandradsn in reply toYellowbluebell

All round to yours for Carrot soup!😁I won't say carrot cake as I'm mentioning cake too often!

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toSandradsn

Saying cake sound perfectly reasonable to me. Better than maybe a few gallons of carrot juice. I thought I had ordered the one kilo bag but when they turned up from Tesco they had their own bloody crate to sit in!! I did suggest to grandson and OH they have carrots as a dessert but met with glazed eyes.!! Oh well baking it is.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

I keep carrots in the frig for weeks...

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

I was hoping to try and keep.sl.e in there and might put some in our shed which is secure from the mice

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

A shed secure from mice? How do you manage that!

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

She's called Soul and she has demolished the field mouse population in the village since we moved in a year ago, she unfortunately has also been the culprit in a few.bird and Dragonfly deaths!! The shed is really secure and although we were initially worried mice would get in because we live near open fields and crops there has been no sign of them so far. X

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

I need one for our campervan...

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

Mice do like.making nests in vehicles especially in winter. Our old neighbour had an old Morris minor in his drive which he let rot and then the mice moved in and he couldn't understand why!

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

Our worst were in the summer, between trips! Mummy mouse fancied my bed as a maternity ward. That was a blanket and duvet plus cover down the drain...

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

Oh dear! Trouble is they breed such big litters and before you known it there are hundreds of.the little buggers.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

They had gone... Measures have been taken!

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

Glad you got rid of them. Much as I like the countryside and am lucky enough to live in a rural village I do not intend to share my house or garden with field mice no matter how cute they look. My eldest daughter has a gorgeous looking cat but hes the cat version of the devil. He quickly moved away from birds and mice and started to bring in rabbits. He then proceeds to eat the bloody things!! He often brings his victims in alive so he can chase them around the house much to the disgust of my daughter who screams if a spider gets too near. His latest victim was a robin.x

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

Not claiming certain success yet! Cute? Nasty dirty things that pee everywhere they walk! Now spiders are fine - furry wild things not so much...

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

To be honest field mice are very small and look quite cute, but your average mouse is like you say dirty and horrible. Because we live near open fields we get field mice not the normal ones. Mind you because of where we live we also get hedgehogs, foxes, falcons, and kites.x

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toYellowbluebell

It was probably a field mouse that invaded our space originally - we were parked next to a vineyard, the harvest was finished and it was getting colder! So was the summer visitor as it must have come from the field...

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toPMRpro

Well hopefully you have seen the end of them for good.x

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toYellowbluebell

Juice, 'em, apparently carrot juice is really good for you.! Never tried it myself, but a friend of mine who is battling cancer goes through four bags a day!!

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toLonsdalelass

That sounds too healthy for me. Your friends wee must be pure carrot juice. Looks like I might need to make cake instead. Such a shame!!

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toYellowbluebell

Ha ha. Actually, I did ask her, she says it isn't!

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toLonsdalelass

PS Uncle Mark's going to have a field day with this topic of discussion!

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toLonsdalelass

Don't encourage me... :-D

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toLonsdalelass

I have an issue with the amount of times i go to the loo because of the pred and pmr as it is, can only imagine how much time i would spend in there if I started juicing!!

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toYellowbluebell

Me too!! I lose count how many times per day and night!

Constance13 profile image
Constance13 in reply toYellowbluebell

Find the nearest stables.😂

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toConstance13

I live in the countryside but have no idea where the nearest stables are

stellafmdm profile image
stellafmdm in reply toYellowbluebell

Any horses nearbye?

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass

And I also love carrot cake, by the way, as well as the M, & S jam doughnuts. Forgot to mention, I haven't made it into work again today, went shopping yesterday, only to the supermarket, but was enough to give me jelly legs yet again and take me back to bed. Bah humbug I say, who bloody cares??? It's only work after all!! I get past caring these days.......

Yellowbluebell profile image
Yellowbluebell in reply toLonsdalelass

I walked 200 yards to our village hall for the turning on of the lights on the Christmas tree and to take grandson to meet santa. Walked back home and went to bed almost immediately. I was not impressed at all at not being able to do even this small bit of exercise!! Bah humbug in deed!!!!

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toYellowbluebell

It's good to console each other in these jelly times. X

Sandradsn profile image
Sandradsn

Just rest those jelly legs 😊

Lonsdalelass profile image
Lonsdalelass in reply toSandradsn

Will do, thank you.

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh

People in glass houses........., etc etc comes to mind !!!

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toJackoh

No idea what you mean Jackie.. :-D

Jackoh profile image
Jackoh in reply tomarkbenjamin57

😂

walker5 profile image
walker5

Love you all!

Brightens my day.

Tonysue profile image
Tonysue

Agree with you. It is difficult at times to bypass all the jokes. Nothing wrong with a laugh but it shouldn’t get in the way of all the sound advice is available on our site.

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toTonysue

Thanks Tonysue, I agree, to a point...

Yep, sometimes these Off (main / serious) Topic ramblings can and do get a bit long-winded! That's why I wrote this Post (but with Tongue very-much-in-Cheek, as I can be one of the worst Offenders) :-D

That said: I know that quite a few people here enjoy the humorous banter and social communication on a forum like this (it is a Social forum primarily - even if under the auspices of being a Health forum): either as light relief from, or often at the same time as selectively dipping-in to the more serious / important stuff around all things PMR and GCA.

My conclusion? I guess we all equal choices here: either to skip the bits that aren't relevant to us and / or we don't find engaging / humorous, or to publicly respond to and / or report any Posts and Conversation Threads that we think aren't appropriate. Beyond that, it's down to the HU Site Moderators to adjudicate.

For me? Like many of Us Lot here, I visit the forum daily and try to read all Posts, regardless: and I try to get involved in the more serious contributions in equal measure with the more eclectic / silly ones. Again, that's everyone's choice...?

I hope this helps to diffuse any potential conflict here - either way ;-)

Best wishes and try to keep smiling on what really can be a difficult health journey..

'Uncle' MB

Constance13 profile image
Constance13 in reply tomarkbenjamin57

I do fear Mark that newbies might be put off though. When they write they are 'scared' and need serious help. Sometimes the long posts get in the way and the main thread is lost.

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toConstance13

Good point Constance, but how to manage the type of content here..?

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply tomarkbenjamin57

"Beyond that, it's down to the HU Site Moderators to adjudicate."

How? You really don't think they read all the posts do you! Only a few of us do that and we are users. I do agree with Constance though, sometimes the long posts do have the potential to get in the way...

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toPMRpro

Yep PMRpro, but so often initially more serious threads / queries do meander off-topic onto all sorts of other things - as we know! A lot of Newbies Post here saying how much they appreciate the lighter / social side of the forum content alongside the more serious stuff (not just my silly ramblings).

Maybe one solution is for new users / others to look for Pinned or Related Posts to be able to differentiate..? It reminds me of when I was a Newbie (seems like a lifetime ago), and it took a while to work out who's who and what angle / experience / knowledge etc they bring.

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply tomarkbenjamin57

Have you looked at the pinned/related posts? Most of them are not necessarily related...

I know, it is difficult. But I think it is important that messing about posts are made obvious. And they aren't always.

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toPMRpro

Yep, a bit of a maze until Newbies get to know the site and other users better, or start 'following' regular contributors. I remember well..

That's why I label my (usually silly) Posts 'The Lighter Side... etc' and try to set people up for the humorous stuff (allegedly..) :-D

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply tomarkbenjamin57

We set up a separate section on one forum - only silliness allowed! Or photos or whatever...

markbenjamin57 profile image
markbenjamin57 in reply toPMRpro

Ah yes, I remember. Maybe we should have one here too...? (but I think I know the answer...)

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply tomarkbenjamin57

How? Doesn't work with this format unfortunately

Constance13 profile image
Constance13 in reply toPMRpro

Pity! Having a”chat room” would separate the serious from the clinical!

PMRpro profile image
PMRproAmbassador in reply toConstance13

Exactly...

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