PMRGCAuk
7,378 members12,100 posts

The Lighter Side: Enough of This Silliness Please. Haven't You Lot got Better things to do on a Friday Night? ;-)

The Lighter Side: Enough of This Silliness Please. Haven't You Lot got Better things to do on a Friday Night? ;-)

Ohh, Words fail me (ok: unusual, I know).

Now, as they say: 'Listen-up and Listen Good' You Lot:

This is meant to be a SERIOUS Community Health forum where we share and sympathetically discuss all things PMR and / or GCA and support one another in the gentle process of coping with our various encounters with Adversity.

But it has come to my attention that not only my recent Posts, but also those of other Contributors here, often degenerate into an Anarchic Shambles of Double-Entendres, merciless Wind-ups, Rantings about peripheral things like the price of Broccolli in Italy, how many miles per gallon you can get from a VW Golf if you drive it with the bonnet and seats removed (to reduce weight?), why your socks don't fit you any more and how to sell them on ebay, the diminishing Sales Market for Freshly caught Cockles in Grimsby, and more inane Nonsense than I can put my Pred Addled Mind to right now. Ohh, the Pain... :-(

Just to say: THIS IS BAD - AND FAKE NEWS!!! Please only write, er 'Stuff' here that has some core relevance to the PMRGCA Cause. And if you don't? Well, er, something or other will, er might (or might not happen) THAT WON'T BE GOOD FOR ANY OF US.

Second thoughts.. please carry on as you are - however irrelevant and Bonkers your contributions. It at least helps some others of Us Lot to have a Giggle-or-two on our often equally difficult PMR / GCA Journey. So, in my books at least, that's a good enough excuse.

Wishing you a happy and peaceful Bank Holiday (UK) weekend. And try not to have Nightmares when you read about the many, often far-from or not-at-all disastrous things reported in the Domestic and International Mee-Ja.

And, as usual.. Try to Keep Smiling.. etc etc.

MB :-)

p.s. And, Yes: I posted this on Thursday evening, not Friday. Oh well, not out of the woods PMR / Pred / Brain Fog-wise just yet then? :-D

145 Replies
oldestnewest

Well, when Friday comes I'll let you know! But for now, who are you to instruct us what to write or not 😜😎

Only kidding 🙄😶

4 likes
Reply

Ha - exactly Pete. You Lot are all Grown-ups (allegedly)? :-D

Ohh, I forgot - not Friday yet.. ;-)

2 likes
Reply

Ha Mark, I thought it was only us old ones who didn't know what day of the week it was. Too much red stuff I guess.

😉🤔😵

2 likes
Reply

One can never have too much of the Red Stuff Pete :-D. Just a (forwards) slip in time for a change ;-)

3 likes
Reply

Are you having an attack of ‘Pred head ‘ Mark,it is not Friday yet ,at least l don’t think it is! Have a good weekend.....

1 like
Reply

Well spotted Grants, I'm getting ahead of myself. Probably due to feeling so much better and having more mental energy to terrorise You Lot with even more silly Posts? :-D

Have a good one too :-)

Reply

More likely to be the vino collapso!

5 likes
Reply

Glug glug DL... ;-) How's the knee?

Reply

Coming along nicely thanks. Just got to get the bursitis in opposite hip sorted and I’ll be flying!

2 likes
Reply

Good for you! Glad all's going to plan and I'm sure the Bursitis will sort itself out in due course. At least it did for me after a few days of hobbling around! :-)

Reply

Think mine’s a bit more entrenched unfortunately. Too many months, nay years, of struggling with dodgy knee and compensating with other leg. But I live in hope.....

.although I guess it will mean more hard earned dosh being spent!

1 like
Reply

Oh well, DL (hey ho, that accidentally rhymed!): keep on the positive side :-)

1 like
Reply

Ha ha like that x

Reply

Markbenjamin57, you do know its Thursday, or are testing our foggy brains x

1 like
Reply

Ohhh, thanks Jeannie. Not testing / teasing You Lot (for once - ha ha).

Yep, hands-up. I'm feeling so mentally and physically energised since my sudden, miraculous and continuing absence of the usual PMR symptoms that I'm racing ahead of myself here. A bit like a car going into top gear and accelerating fast? Let's hope the proverbial wheels don't fall off ... :-D

3 likes
Reply

As long as it's only your wheels 😵

2 likes
Reply

and not my tackle. That would be a VERY serious problem.. :-D :-D

1 like
Reply

Serious indeed 😱😰😵

1 like
Reply

No Pastit - It's not just his wheels - It's the the grey blob thing inside the dome on top that's misfiring. Glad that he feels so good though..

2 likes
Reply

Thanks arthur. As for your reference to the 'grey blob thing.. etc': is that a medical term? :-D

1 like
Reply

That's OK Mark. Glad to be of service. The reason I know about these things is that my great -great uncle Ebenezer was an early blob-thing surgeon. He used to chisel off the lid, take out the blob with his wife's coal tongs, get it on his work-bench - and do his best to mend it (or so he told the family). I'm afraid you won't find him in the surgical text books. He is though mentioned in most books on Victorian serial killers. Never mind - Our family think he was a misunderstood pioneer.

I'm glad that you're feeling perky Mark. I am on the way down the pred slope after losing an eye to GCA - and I think normal insanity is returning bit-by-bit.

Good Luck.

Arthur

5 likes
Reply

Lovely story, arthur! :-D Glad you're resuming normal service after your skirmish with GCA. I can only imagine.... And I like the term ' normal insanity' - perfect!

Thanks for the good wishes - I'll keep you all posted

MB :-)

Reply

PS Mark - I still have old Ebenezer's medical notes somewhere. I can clear a space on my work-bench, and have a shot at your blob thing if the need arises.

Let me know.

1 like
Reply

Ok Arthur, thanks. I'll send it in the post today..

1 like
Reply

Best you send it First Class. Blob things can go off a bit after a while - and I'm sure you want it back after I've done with it - or maybe not.

Reply

I think it's in the same medical dictionary as tackle!

2 likes
Reply

It is MamaBeagle. I can see that you are a fellow surgeon.

2 likes
Reply

This is Fun .. Can anyone join in.. ? 😂

1 like
Reply

Yes Cinka - if you dare :-D

Reply

Hmm .. It's going to be a challenge to match your standards of silliness, Mark - respectfully said, goes without sayin' .. - can it even be done?? ..

I'll work on it .. 😶

1 like
Reply

Go for it Cinka - I like a bit of competition...! ;-)

1 like
Reply

Yes, I'm looking forward to that feeling. If ever I do 😜

1 like
Reply

Speaking of wheels MB - was there any news from the Plods about your missing Merc?

Reply

Rokerman, you'll need to look at my more recent Post to find out... ;-)

1 like
Reply

I'm not the only one who can't keep up I see 😲

Reply

I'm sorry, but there's No Hope for you Pete. Do the right thing: hand yourself over to TAWMBO (The Aunties Who Must Be Obeyed) and pray for Mercedes. May Gosh be with you (sorry, the predelictive sext on my i.tinerary is messing around a grin). :-D

Reply

I think it is more likely it was Friday night...

1 like
Reply

Talk about the pot calling the kettle black! It’s all relevant to this all consuming pig of a disease, be it the price of bananas or a malevolent soft toy. Taking my son to see King Lear with Sir Ian McKellen (Serena). To demonstrate the folly of writing off the old and infirm.

1 like
Reply

:-) Jane. I quite agree with you.

1 like
Reply

This post is definitely either a hitherto unknown symptom of PMR or yet another side effect of Steroids. Either way, I think somebody should have it classified and we may receive millions in funding for research!

3 likes
Reply

Classification: Terminally Bonkers..? That should bring a few pennies in..

Reply

"Classification: Thermally Bonkers" for us perhaps should be classified as 'Normal' but that's only my opinion 😲

Reply

'Thermally'... Pete? Is that a predictive text typo or do you mean as Mad as a Box of Frogs AND Hot under the Collar too? :-D

1 like
Reply

I should double check my posting. I have noticed that sometimes I type a word the bxxxdy Mobil phone changes the word. Well spotted Mark.

Obviously it should be termally. It did it again just then but I managed to catch it 😲😰😱

Reply

'Termally'.. Pete? Is that Irish for 'Thermally..'? :-D :-D (..no offence intended to the Irish PMRGCA Lot..). Ohhh, better stop now... ;-) :-D

1 like
Reply

I think after that I had better take more water with it 😰

Oh well it's better than not knowing what day of the week it is. 🙄😲😵

1 like
Reply

Listen 'Mush': I DO know what day of the week it is!! It's August Bank Boxing Easter Shrove, May Day, er, um, ok I give up. NURSE - FETCH THE SCREENS!!!! ;-/

1 like
Reply

I'm always having that probable. There must be some way of reparation it.

2 likes
Reply

What, arthur463, your dooing it now, what's wrong with these bxxxdy phones 😱

Reply

'Mobil..'? Does it run on 20W/50 or Synthetic? Either way, unusual for a cell phone.. :-D

1 like
Reply

No I just wind it up 🙄

1 like
Reply

It is 4pm Friday here in Adelaide, what a shame it is not a long weekend here. I presume Mark you were referring to those of us down under with your rant. Please keep ranting so I can keep smiling.

1 like
Reply

Thanks shaz, Greetings from Old Blighty. 'Rantings of a Polymylingerer...'?. Could just be the title of my next silly book. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!! ;-) :-D

Reply

"The Predeater"?

3 likes
Reply

Just for your info. Mark, cockling has been banned in our bay at Morecambe. The authorities say it's to build up stocks but I suspect it's because the rivel gangs kept fighting.

1 like
Reply

The Cockle Wars Chris..? OMG! :-D

Reply

It was all ok until our European friends came over with their cockle picking slaves, it's big money. Sorry to dampen things but it caused a big tragedy here a few years back.

Reply

I would like cockling to be banned in Surrey too. I don't use my cockle so much anymore, but I don't want some beastly cockle hunter coming after it!

1 like
Reply

Steady arthur463, we didn't want to get banned. We've got enough trouble with MB57 😵😲🤗

1 like
Reply

I've been banned from better places than THIS... :-D

2 likes
Reply

Phew Mark - Thanks for that. I could imagine Pastit getting out his shotgun.

1 like
Reply

Perish the thought - especially with his Terminal Brain Fog and all manner of associated and potentially un-predictable PMR symptoms.

Reply

I don't know could give you a bit of a lift! 😉

1 like
Reply

I can't comment at the moment. Pastit is watching me.

1 like
Reply

Hello Mark Ozzy the cat here. And I thought this forum was for me to publish my Chronicles! Well. My mum has PMR, so I reckon that’s near enough a reason. 😉 As for brocolli in Italy I haven’t a clue but I’ve been nibbling the brocolli plants dad has been growing (humans are blaming moths but it know better). I’ve moved on to the sweet corn leaves now... they love me really.

I haven’t a clue what day it is, a bit like you. Will I ever know? Who knows? Who cares? I don’t as long as I get my grub.

Love and purrs Ozzy x

1 like
Reply

Purrfect Ozzy.. I expect you're off for a cat nap afterwards? ;-) :-D

1 like
Reply

Naturally, I can never get enough naps. Love Ozzy

1 like
Reply

You are quite right, this is a serious site and is being hijacked by the likes of a flippant 77 year old flaunting her geriatric body in a bikini. One on a yacht and another in a floating Avocado, behaving like a teenage Facebook junkie

This has to stop as fellow members would far rather hear about the state of my swollen feet and legs covered in bruises due to struggling with flight socks, tonsillitis, mouth ulcers and painful hips.Also worry about my CRP which was 19 before I went and is now probably double, the fact that I have been on the Roids over 4 years and still stuck on 15 despite getting down to 3 twice. My Rheumatologist, who reminds me of BraveHeart ( sorry that may maybe too flippant ) has been threatening me with the dreaded sparers for a year and I am seeing him in September. Two stone over weight with a body falling out of itself and a chronic painful disease disease That’s what we are here for. Thank goodness we have you to keep us in check, even though you don’t know know what day it is

🥂🥂x

1 like
Reply

I try Edith - for my Sins.. ;-). Now, it's Saturday already: what's the Plan Stan... ? :-D

1 like
Reply

'Already my boy' It might be Saturday in OZ but by my newspaper it's still Friday.😵

Last week I shopped in TESCO and proceeded to buy a newspaper. The paper didn't have the usual supplements inside which contain the TV programs. So I said to the assistant what's happened to the supliments inside the paper? She said they come out on Saturday, so I said, well it is Saturday. She no it's not, it's Friday. I didn't know where to hide 😱😲😵

1 like
Reply

Sorry Pete, but there's No Hope. Your traumatic experience at TESCO is symbolic of The End of Civilised Society as Us Lot know it. We're All Doooomed.. :-(

1 like
Reply

I'm speechless 😪

Reply

Yep, sorry, but the End of the World is Nigh. On the other hand, there's always Morrisons?

1 like
Reply

Morrison's what?

1 like
Reply

As they say nowadays: "Go Figure"... :-D

1 like
Reply

There Azda be a Morrison's, doesn't there Tesco? Regards - Sainsbury

2 likes
Reply

I think you've lost it Arthur463. May I suggest you contemplate your navel for a short while. 😜

Reply

Pete, don't encourage him. He's bad enough already.

1 like
Reply

Yes, he could be a competitor to the bonkers club 🤔

1 like
Reply

Yep Pete. He's on my MB Disrupter Surveillance List.. ;-/

1 like
Reply

My Naval what?

Reply

Naval, Navel, Schnavel or Whaadever? ALL FAKE NOOZ!!!

Yours Sincerely

'Don'

Reply

No fluff...

1 like
Reply

ha ha :-D

Reply

What about LIDL...?

Reply

Sorry - I don't know much about Lidl and Aldi udder ones.

Reply

Ohh.. My G*d. Please give me the Intellectual Strength to fight the Curse of competitive Word Mangling. :-(

ALDI Best... :-D

Reply

Yeh! - but you know you love it - a Lidl.

1 like
Reply

All I can say is Wait.. Rose....!

1 like
Reply

Touché Mark

1 like
Reply

No it’s not, it’s Sunday 🥂

2 likes
Reply

Whaaaadever... :-D

Reply

No Edith - It was Sunday this morning - This afternoon, it's one of the others.

2 likes
Reply

Keep going, you're obviously on a roll now arthur..! :-D

Reply

No Arthur, you are wrong. As I am still in bed it is nighttime.

Thanks for your concern, I am much better than yesterday, just taking it easy.

Have a good day

🥂

2 likes
Reply

Oh Edith - You can' tell what time it is just because you're in bed. My preds turn day into night, and beds into sports cars - etc.

1 like
Reply

PS Edith - You do seem to be going through the mill! What a business. Thinking of you. Stay in touch.

Reply

Blimey, he's got you at it now 😱

Reply

Like me your probably don't care what day it is when you go through a few pain free days and just have a post euphoria frenzy while it lasts.

How is the dizziness going? Any better?

I am assuming that your comments about having to spend less time chatting about amusing stuff or there would be trouble is part of your usual banter and not a serious issue from warnings by the site bods for you to limit your written behaviour to medical concerns and advice.

In all seriousness, I love reading the banter and posts on this group board, even if it doesn't always relate to anything PMR or GCA. It does give some ease and breaks the tension of going through continual pains , especially while still in the fog before diagnosis .

And, by adding a little humour and the day to day activities to the mix along with symptoms and concerns will definitely lift some of the fear and concern about the future for new sufferers , or long termers with new issues, who are genuinely worried about life after GCA . And those lighter moments will help some bring up proper concerns of their own that they have been to scared to give voice to , even on a public forum , because you are all so approachable.

I suppose adding a note to posts like , a serious question, or living with... might help some site users who just want to voice medical or practical concerns and find info , rather than enjoying finding a cool supportive group of friends that can help to lift the Gloom on the days when your in pain, isolated and stuck in the house and feeling downright miserable.

Keep it up you batty bunch , you cheer the day with your stuff about avacados in bikinis!? and cockles driving Corvettes through ice cream Parlours!?? ( Perhaps I have caught the mental fog) .

5 likes
Reply

Exactly. I don’t care what day it is. No more dizziness, my Magnesium and Sodium levels were too low so I have supplements for the former and stuff myself with a daily banana and Brazil nuts. Not good for

the obesity but so be it.

I think the mix of verging insanity, shared experience and sound evidenced based information is amazing.I have found it a lifeline . My husband has many patients who come armed with what they have read on Dr Google and although it can be helpful it can also be overwhelming , it’s about judgement .No one knows everything although I suspect collectively there’s not much we dont

Have a good day

🥂x

Reply

I was checking on MB after chatting on a recent post he had left , but glad to hear you are having a better time with dizziness too.

The bananas and Brazil nuts are great, but if you fancy some lower fat options to for the minerals I can give you some suggestions.

Is the nutrient deficiency because of meds or part of the illness?

And, did people have Vitamin deficiencies not related to poor lifestyle before diagnosis?

I have just received the Vitamin D result of a melanin deficient vampire , despite eating properly , supplements and getting out in the sun when I can ( or have to as a nature artist and designer being outside and trying to get through the pain to work is essential).

I am still floundering under the weight of the boffins thinking about what I could have, probably autoimmune / autoinflammatory ,as at my age (47), and the number of years of escalating issues , GCA/PMR is at the end of a Very long list of stuff to test for.

Finding this group has given me some vital info that Dr. Google, a very big and miss GP, that helped me understand what those conditions are and rang some giant bells in my ears ( no, it wasn't just the tinnitus, that prefers to screech!) But most importantly, while trying to cope and find answers happening on your banter in this group really has helped to get me through the pain and fatigue over the last few months.

So, thank you all for making my medical nightmare at little easier to cope with.

2 likes
Reply

No I was fine before, my diet has always been good. I have demineralised with 4 years plus of steroids for GCA but I will try anything

Like you I have lots of sun so that’s not a problem.

I have come to recognise that whatever we have is highly complex and multifaceted , it’s a question on trying what works do get the best quality of life. So difficult for us as we all to to share the same controlling and solution focussed personalities

Have a good day

🥂

Reply

Yes, that is one of the most annoying things about going through an illness that creeps up on you and affects different areas at different times.

The GP instantly starts trying to blame your lifestyle and diet , and when they compare your symptoms to your report of how you live and don't find an infection they doubt you are telling the truth so they can look for the simplest answer , rather than considering that the fact that you live healthily means that they should start considering something more complex and multi system affecting.

Then , of course , they bring in the let's blame it on stress or anxiety card, as I keep pointing out, I am not ill because I am stressed, I have some stress because I am ill and am not receiving a diagnose.

I can tell from reading the posts here, and the level of humour created by you wonderful fruit and nutters, that like me , that you have no problem coping with anxiety and stress in a healthy way, although I bet many have been accused of anxiety related malaise.

No we suffer from a whole other form of insanity. Pain induced lunacy. And thank goodness, its side effects do more for the pain than the prodding and poking!

4 likes
Reply

I have lots of sun - but without supplements my vit D falls.

1 like
Reply

Thank you I will have them checked 🥂

Reply

I'll tell my Doctor that you need a supliment, he will probably say "they don't do anything"

Reply

I don't want to be too personal - but bananas are best eaten.

Reply

You know Mark, it's this insanity that keeps us sane!

I'm sure I'm not the only one here that doesn't get out much, for whatever reasons, and the social interaction on this site does more for my health than any doctor ever has. Medical info and support and a good laugh, what more could we ask?

6 likes
Reply

Quite...! :-)

Reply

Hear-Hear Scats. I don't get out much either just now - so these insanitary people are a great help.

2 likes
Reply

arthur, I think this one's going to run and run... :-D

2 likes
Reply

Trust you 😲

1 like
Reply

I think your phone has been 'correcting' you again, perhaps it saw Mark's selfie at the beginning! Definitely insanitary.

3 likes
Reply

scats, that's not me, it's 'Steptoe'. Aptly named because he's famous for Stepping on the Toes of holidaymakers at WSM... :-D

Reply

Boom boom!

Reply

The old ones are the best... ;-)

Reply

Oh God! Is there a selfie of Markedly? I am really amazing.

2 likes
Reply

FAKE NEWS!!! I wasn't there. And even if I was, my Lawyers will confirm that I wasn't.

Reply

After you'd been on the Red Stuff? I believed we were getting a real telling off and was just getting ready to retaliate when you dropped your guard, took me a whole minute to think of guard!! Now my head hurts - stop it Mark - second thoughts don't.

1 like
Reply

Admittedly Telian, I sometimes (but not always) get busy writing after a glass or two of the Red Stuff. It tends to bring out the mischievous side of me for better or worse. Confession: it's always fun 'spoofing' You Lot here, within reason. "Is he / isn't he Serious..?" etc. I usually try to set-up the gags / storyline so you know what's coming, but not too obviously. But that's enough of my Trade Secrets as a Humorous (allegedly) writer.. ;-)

But I have over-done it once or twice and been TOO convincing for my own good (e.g. the recent 'Stolen Limo' story). Ohhhh... Result? An avalanche of sincere (but sadly mis-guided) concern and good wishes from You Lot - and then I have to hold my hands up and eat a large slice of Humble Pie. Bless....

I sometimes wonder how the Site Administrators let me get away with it - honest! :-D

Reply

Just read in the papers that U.K. is one of the top eight countries in the world for women consuming alcohol, 3 drinks a day, men not so bad at 3 drinks a day. Top for men is Luxembourg with 7.4 drinks a day. That is one hell of a lot of drinks! The US are not mentioned for either.

Reply

Yes piglette. I've also read in today's papers that alcohol is bad for you. So that's it. I'm giving up. (Reading the papers, that is..) ;-) :-D

3 likes
Reply

Obviously they need larger glasses "I only have one glass a day..."

5 likes
Reply

True, I have seen wine glasses that can hold a whole bottle of wine, be rather heavy though for us pmrers!

1 like
Reply

Straws????????

1 like
Reply

How ladylike I would just slurp it up as usual!!

Reply

Well piglette - I'm not surprised that people are in trouble if they only have three drinks a day. I'm more in the Luxembourg category myself - for as long as the pension hold-up!

2 likes
Reply

They'll be counting your steps as you near the Mark mark!!

1 like
Reply

Memorandum

From: The Site Administrator

To: markbenjamin57

Rest assured - We know who you are.

Please don't panic - We are sending the men in white coats around for you. They have a nice jacket for you that ties up at the back. You will love it. Then we will take you to a nice quiet room with soft padded walls. Most of our lodgers love it in there - as far as we can tell. They can't hear us, and better still, we can't hear them.

While you are waiting for us, we suggest that you eat some paracetamols, and have a lie down.

Please first unlock your front door and shut your dog and your wife in a separate room. We don't want any violence.

1 like
Reply

Dear Site Admin

Thank you for your Polite Notification. But I'll have you know (and also That Other Lot) that I'm not giving in without a FIIGGHHHTTT. I've earned my place in this, er, 'Community' (I say that advisedly) and intend to satay hear (sorry, predictive text playing up again).

As for straightjackets: I have much experience of these and know how to release the cords with my Man from U.N.C.L.E. Special Agent Toolkit (circa 1972). Enough said?

And.. I don't like 'quiet' rooms where no-one can hear me, nor me them. But that's enough about my local GP surgery. Also, I neither have a Wife nor a Dog (sold them on ebay last week) - just my Trusty Limo Valeter and Minder Tedski. And he's not to be messed with - especially after a Vodka or 6. Ok, 12 at last count.

But as a Goodwill gesture I WILL unlock the door to my 17th floor balcony at Benjamin Mansions to allow you access if you insist. Just be careful when you climb the scaffolding - it's a bit slippery out there tonight.

Yours Obligingly

MB57

2 likes
Reply

Memorandum

From: The Site Administrator

To: markbenjamin57

I am so sorry that we couldn't collect you yesterday. Bert the driver managed to get the blue flashing light going, but he couldn't start the engine. He's new to the job, and I'm not paid to drive it. Anyway, we found your statements to be a bit daunting - veiled threats even, so you may have to stay on your self-administered red stuff, and slowly go bonkers at home instead of in our lovely soft room.

We are a department of the NHS, so you are not allowed to threaten us. Furthermore, once we fail a task - we automatically forget about it. as we now have with you.

1 like
Reply

Dear SA

I have noted your kind response. Please convey to 'Bert' my sympathies after his clearly traumatic experience in a vain effort to rescue me. And.. good job the Old Bill / DVLA weren't around to check his Driving Licence?!

If it helps: I often appreciate the experience of the Blue Flashing lights and associated Sirens of the many assorted Emergency Services Vehicles that visit my locality on a daily basis. And, dare I say, in my Existential Loneliness, I am even consoled by such attention.

As for my (q) 'veiled threats etc..': please don't interpret these as anything other than a clumsy attempt to imitate those of a certain, er, International Celebrity known simply as 'Don'. Like many others, I am but a poor and vulnerable Victim of Today's Media-Driven Society too. Ohh, the Pain...

In conclusion: to be honest, I am glad that the NHS has forgotten about me. It helps me to move forwards in my tortured Life, for better or worse. I am at Peace now.

That said.. WHERE ARE THOSE B****Y BLUE FLASHING LIGHTS?!!! Things are getting a bit boring at Benjamin Mansions tonight... :-(

'NURSE.. FETCH THE SCREENS!!!! (again). OHHHH....

:-D

1 like
Reply

It's Godfrey here - Part-time site administrator, and NHS Black Van superintendent - NHS.

I have had a word with Bert about the point you raised re his licence. This has really deeply upset him. He says that he does have a licence for a motorised lawnmower, and he thought that this would be OK. He wonders whether he could drop off a nice bottle of Scotch at Benjamin Mansions to help you along the way?

1 like
Reply

That's ok then Godfrey. Please remind Bert that his lawnmower licence is ok for, er lawns, but he might get his collar felt by the Old Bill Traffic Division if he takes the Briggs & Stratton out for a spin on the M5. But if he is tempted, tell him to remove the grass collecting box to reduce weight and improve acceleration, and watch out for the speed enforcement cameras.

Thank you for the offer of the Scotch. Unfortunately I don't drink the hard stuff but the Nurse says a nice bottle of Cotes du Rhone would be ok...

Reply

Bert says OK Lord Benjamin - Cote du Rhone. He wants you to understand that this is the price of silence on your part.

Bert has never worried about enforcement cameras. The best speed he's ever done was 15 mph on Cranleigh cricket field in 1985, while being chased by an angry Alsatian. He mowed his way to the next village and hid in The Bricklayers Arms (and all this with only one leg). Unfortunately, he left his sandwiches in the mower box, and the Alsatian scoffed them all.

Bert dreams of Briggs and Stratton most nights. He has a 1924 Atco with a 25cc Villiers engine. There is something seriously wrong with it - in the middle of striping the cricket pitch - it can suddenly head straight for the Dog and Duck in the corner, and crash into the big potted Wisteria there. Poor Bert has to put down two or three pints to combat the shock. Our village mechanic still can't find why it homes-in on The Dog and Duck.

Bert was a gardener until he was forced to retire after contracting potato blight.

He has not had an easy life.

Reply

Dear Gordon (or whoever)

Well, that's a relief. I'm always happy to CO-OPerate in non-disclosure arrangements. If they're good enough for that nice American actress lady, Stormy Daniels, they're good enough for me.

It does sound like your dear friend 'Bert' has had quite a lot of 'excitement' in his life. Goodness, 15 mph on a Briggs & Stratton, that must be some kind of record! And, presumably, without the benefit of Satnav, ABS or Traction Control like in the latest Black & Decker racing mowers? But I have read somewhere that B&S mowers do tend to be a bit tail-happy at full tilt - a bit like early Porsche 911s? Just a thought: maybe Bert could try applying some opposite-lock when negotiating the right-angle bends at the end of the lawn? But only if his Vertigo will permit.

Bert's misfortune reminds me of few years ago when, in my temporary job as Park Keeper and Bouncer at the local crazy golf course in WSM, I had a similarly catastrophic Brake Failure whilst being terrorised by a demented Yorkshire Terrier and ended-up accidentally ram-raiding our local Wetherspoons. My memory of the 'Incident' (as described by the Old Bill) is a bit hazy: but my 'Friends' (in fact, I have 2 now) tell me I spent a happy 3 weeks convalescing there.

The local Magistrates were quite lenient when I explained who I was, and stating Mitigating Circumstances in my Defence. Fortunately, I got-off the various Charges (q.) 'Criminal Damage to a Boozer, Driving a Lawn Mower at Excessive Speed and Without Due Care and Attention, Exceeding the Speed Limit for a Briggs & Stratton' etc etc. with just an ASBO after pleading Terminal Insanity due to the ravages of PMR and The Preds. Phew...

As for Bert's disability: I can relate, if only vicariously. I once had an uncle with a wooden leg called Stan (I never did find out what his other leg was called). He died at age 106 in violent circumstances after having a secret fling with the lady next door and was murdered by her younger, jealous husband aged 104. Oh well, at least he went out with a bang?

On that note: I must go because my lovely young Croatian Nurse (Samantha) is banging like fury on the balcony door on Floor 17 - to be let back in. I inadvertently locked her out there at lunchtime and totally forgot about her when preparing for my afternoon kip. Ooops!

With Kind Regards

Lord Benjamin OBE*, Queen's 2nd Polymylingerers' Regiment (Retired).

(*One Boiled Egg)

1 like
Reply

Such fascinating stuff Lord B (if I may make so bold as to call you that).

I'm so sorry to hear about your wooden-legged uncle Stan. I will tell Bert all about it. He has similar traits to you uncle. He always claims to have had his leg blown off while he was rescuing a flock of Nuns from the Huns in France in WW2. In fact it happened as he was climbing the convent bell tower with two bottles of brandy, which he intended to use to bargain with these Nuns - he wouldn't say what their side of the bargain was to be, Anyway, he lost his grip and fell quite some way - all except his leg, which had tangled in the bell rope. Small World, isn't it?

Anyway - I am curious about your Croatian nurse Samantha -but I don't quite know how to phrase the detailed questions I have in mind.

Godfrey Higgins - Queens Royal Milkmen - BF VD and Scar (Deactivated)

1 like
Reply

:-D

Reply

Mark - I have completely forgotten what's up with you in all this exciting reminiscing. I know you take preds, and it seems to be for PMR (mine is for GCA - but it results in the same type of insanity) I do understand that you have a serious mental problem, but ignoring that - How are you coming along with the more boring PMR aspects, my friend?

I am so stuck indoors that I find it fascinating to share my drugged-up lunacy with a true gold-plated madman.

Do update me. - Then I can pick things up with Lord B again.

Kind Thoughts

Arthur

Reply

Ha ha Arthur :-)

Well, recently, my PMR symptoms seem to have almost burned-out after the usual Snakes & ladders Pred tapering journey during the past 3 years. Now, back at 2 mgpd and feeling good after a brief flirtation with Pred Club Zero but with the symptoms creeping back.

Along the way, the typical low level pain and stiffness whilst trying to get the Pred dosage 'right' and a few flares: but the main curse has been awful DF (Deathly Fatigue) which also seems to be a hallmark of these types of illnesses. I'm sure many here can relate. Oh, and not forgetting the special bonus prize of regular episodes of Costochondritis, hip bursitis etc where the PMR inflammation rampages around in other parts of the body. Oh well...

But fortunately, all of this - including the episodes of DF, is less frequent and intense nowadays. Looking back, it makes you realise what a nasty condition PMR is...

So, 2mgpd Pred seems to be keeping things in check, and slowly-does-it in reducing again to Zero. As always, we'll see. I've always been pretty fit and active pre PMR, and relatively young (61) so hopefully I'm getting close to the end of my PMR Journey. That said, the wisdom is that it can take a year or so for the 'system' to get back to normal even when PMR has gone into remission. Note to self: don't push things, even when feeling better.

Given all of the above, I still consider myself fortunate not to have had a skirmish with GCA - as I know you and a few others have. I can only imagine...

And, of course, during my PMR Journey I've had immense fun rambling and ranting-on here, if irresponsibly egged-on by a few of You Lot. All of which has resulted in the publication of my first silly book (details on the main PMRGCAuk website), an invitation to speak at the annual Members' Day on 8 September, and Volume 2 of the book already underway. Wow - what Me? - 'MB Author and Speaker'?! You couldn't make it up... But, somehow, I did: despite the Life Changing ravages of PMR.

In the meantime (whether a member of The Pred Club or Pred Club Zero), it's business as usual writing Posts, getting back out into Society at large, even doing some of my main work (Corporate Training and Consulting) again. Actually, it's quite exciting.

That's it on the more serious side, Arthur. We carry on... and hopefully forwards.

Now, back to the rantings of the eccentric The Right Hon. Lord B at Benjamin Mansions... :-) Where are you located, and what's your background (only if you want to share..)?

Best wishes

MB

1 like
Reply

Hello Mark

Thanks for the lowdown on yourself and your progress. You too have been on a bit of a journey by all accounts. I'm so pleased that you are emerging from those beastly shadows. You used an interesting phrase at the end - "Getting back into Society at large". That hits my current thoughts right on the button. I have become such an isolated hermit over the past year, partly due to various mechanical failures in spine and hip - but due too to a certain feeling of inadequacy when socialising (weird). So I kind of surrendered and have tended to sit at my drawing room window playing with my PC - which has been a real blessing. However - I am down from 60 mg to 9 now - and have noticed that the sun is shining out there, so I started to wonder - Then of course, I met you! So anyway, I have started a strict rehab regime - Pub lunches at a different venue each time with my wife as chauffer and minder, and the dog under the tablet to eat what I can't. It's working well so far.

You asked about my whereabouts and background:-

I am a good bit older than you - 78 last time I looked. I live in a little village called Wonersh, about four miles South of Guildford in Surrey. One wife one little house and one dog Teddy - and a motor - and a touring caravan for my sins (I won't be towing that anymore with one eye). Here we go: I have had a heart attack and three strokes - quite a while back. I used to have gout now and then - and now I have this dratted GCA which has cost me my right eye. STOP.

I took slightly early retirement in 2001 due to my heart attack. I didn't like that - I enjoyed my work Mark. I wasn't ready for it either - no plans!

I was a Division Manager in a research company in Leatherhead, Surrey. The other five divisions earned much of their money by thinking really clever thoughts for Government departments.. I and my lot, on the other hand, used to assess a very wide range of electrical and electronic product for safety, performance and fitness for function for a wide variety of manufacturers before they went on the market - and produce (Government approved) reports and certification. It worked due to the fact that most major retail chains and wholesalers wouldn't order up say 10,000 Sony TVs or Hoover washing machines until they had seen one of our pretty certificates.

There is a pub in the next village where a bunch of us old farts get together in a cosy corner of the bar at lunch times - maybe a dozen or so, if they all turned-up. We have denoted it "The Gay Corner", which usually ensures that strangers don't come and sit on our stools - usually. I kind of lost my nerve to go there when GCA and preds struck. I miss them. Retirement is a great leveller Mark - There's a guy who used to be head of Corporate law at Mobiloil - a guy who owns two estate agencies in posh Richmond - a housing developer etc. ---- Then there's Mick the scaffolder, a tiler, a mechanic - and so on, all retired. - a super bunch. - and the best conversations don't always come from where you might expect. Getting back on my stool is my very next objective.

Well Mark - You did ask.

As you have said before - Onward and.......... Er .........Upward was it?

Kindest Regards

Arthur

Reply

Hi Arthur

Thanks for sharing your story, nice to know more about you.

Well, my journey isn't too bad all considered, and in the wider context of some people's experiences here. Yes, 'getting back into...' etc was intended as a bit of an ironic gag (like a re-habilitated Criminal Offender?): but I know what you mean. I'm certain that, for many of Us Lot, the ravages of our illnesses really do take it out of us in terms of mental and emotional energy, as much as physically.

I, for one, lost some confidence (or perhaps motivation?) to go out and socialise as per usual many times on my PMR Journey. Many people here report that even social gatherings with N&D are more demanding, maybe for the same reason? On one hand, you want to give your best and engage in social 'business as usual'. On the other, due to depleted energy levels, you dread it. But you don't want to sit in a social group and go through the tortuous process of explaining the complexities of PMR to people who say "But you look so well!", change the subject and really don't get it. Or worse still, compete by sharing their own tales of health woes. Ohhhh.. am I cynical or what?

That said, I've never been particularly gregarious (despite appearing so here, and larking about in my public life as a trainer, conference speaker etc.). My Personality Type tends towards Introversion rather than Extroversion, so that maybe explains why I'm relatively happy in my own 'world' rather than partying all night. That said, I do enjoy 'performing' in whatever context: but only so long as I can retreat into my private world afterwards.

Interesting to learn about your work - and perhaps, more important, your retirement 'experience'. Funnily enough, amongst my other training assignments over the years, I used to run Pre-retirement / Change workshops for big companies and in the public sector. Usually a bunch of 50-60 year olds being 'let go' by their employers after a lifetime in what I call a 'proper' job (could never relate personally, since for most of my life I've been self-employed for better or worse). My 'disciples' usually fell into 2 broad camps: those who couldn't wait to escape and do the gardening all day / go on 17 Cruises a year, etc etc. And then, others who admitted to dreading the massive loss of occupationally-centred routine, status and camaraderie. And for many, the loss of Personal Identity. A few used to tell me that the phrase "I'm retired" was almost symbolic of being at the end of the road of life after being able to say "I am a [insert job title]" for the last 35 years. Social Psychologists often say that, in Western Society, we are often defined by our occupation more than anything. Mmmmm... so true.

I have an 'old' pal (a youthful 78, like you) like that in WSM. A very successful and high flying (now ex) aerospace industry senior director, 'let go' at age 60-something due to an organisational takeover. Very wealthy in retirement but like a lost soul for about 5 years afterwards. He used to say to me in the pub: "MB, xyz (company) was my Life. Everything was planned and done for me. I had a dedicated team, status, travelled the world and loved my job. Now I'm on the trash heap". In truth, he was angry and depressed, but too proud to admit it. The Kubler-Ross Change Curve comes to mind (if you don't know about it already). But he survived, and now enjoys sailing, travelling etc. He made the Kubler-Ross Transition eventually. As you rightly say, 'Retirement' is a leveller - at least for many people who've worked in 'proper jobs' all their life. For better or worse, mine hasn't quite followed the same path other than a hopefully temporary semi-retirement with PMR. Hence the term 'getting back out there..' We'll see...

Your 'Gay Corner' (I'm laughing) pub mates sound a good Lot and I'm sure they've all been through a similar experience in one way or another - many of us have in mid to later life. One thing I've learned on my Journey is that the best friendships stand the test of time, and when (not if!) you build-up enough emotional steam to re-engage with them, you'll probably get a Hero's welcome. I will expect a progress report. Or, better still, why don't you write a Post here about the Old Farts' reunion to amuse Us Lot? You have a great writing style, almost as witty as mine (only joking..).

So Arthur, that's it for now. Keep your chin up and remember the saying: On.. and Forwards. Or is it Sideways - just like Bert's errant Briggs & Stratton? Whaaadever, so long as its 'on.. and something..'.

'We carry on, until or unless..' etc ;-)

Best wishes & looking forward to staying in touch.

MB :-)

Reply

"even social gatherings with N&D are more demanding"

They are the worst...

1 like
Reply

Ohhhh.... :-D

Reply

It’s 5 o’clock somewhere Mark!

1 like
Reply

You may also like...