Brain out

[Ronswife]

I find I cannot do bookkeeping for my business without major stress to my brain that is a heavy feeling in the top of my head, pressure inside my skull and a blackening out of being able to think logically. I have to stop as it is scary as if I'm going to have a stroke. There is nothing left to give. Pure exhaustion mentally. I am at 7 mg and I have had this head feeling over a year I am so aware now of the extremes of the stress depleting me. Has anyone seen another kind of doctor such as an endocrinologist?

[SheffieldJane]

I wonder if you’ve got to a major precipitating factor for your PMR ( is it?). The sheer stress of doing the books for your business. I know there are some thoughts and issues that I avoid since becoming ill. I can relate to a feeling of pressure in your head. This disease points so clearly to the factors in our lives that cause stress. Would it be possible for you to talk to a therapist about this sheer burnt out exhaustion?

Would it be possible to let go and employ someone else to do your books?

I am not sure from what you’ve told us, what added value an Endocrinologist would add. However a skilled psychologist may well help you to manage this debilitating stress. Good luck!

[SnazzyD]

An adrenal test may be a good idea to rule problems out, but I also agree with SJ. Our bodies are very good at calling time on things that become too detrimental to be sustainable with the the passing years. If your symptoms go away with a real break away from doing the books, I would be very suspicious.

[Soraya_PMR]

There was me moaning about my defunct brain for my hobby, and you’re struggling with similar, over more important work stuff.

I agree with SnazzyD that taking a break may be diagnostic.

I recall as a kid at exam time, sitting looking at questions, and panic would ensue, a hot swoosh over my brain, complete inability, fainting would have been a great way to cop out! A sensible teacher advised to sit back and watch the second hand for a full rotation, then maybe your breathing slows? Breathing exercises may help. Mine was pure adrenaline I guess, and we really need to avoid those occasions if we can. Hope you can get a break.

[HeronNS]

I haven't had the same head feeling as you, but I distinctly remember the day I watched evening news (don't usually) and a particularly annoying civic issue came up. Over the years I've been involved in civic and other issues, usually to do with environment, in a sort of peripheral way. I'm the one who writes letters to the editor, or to city council or the local MP, etc, and goes on marches and to town hall meetings.... So this particular evening I'd been on pred for a few months. My dose was 8 mg, and I suddenly felt like my body was burning up, I could almost feel all the old PMR sizzling in my body like a smouldering fire. I actually increased my dose for a day or two, and from that moment I've picked my battles very carefully. I know this is not the same as having to do something which is related to making a living, but the stress is the same, the body doesn't distinguish, just recognises that there's stress coming, and it flinches. Now I relinquish the political agitation to younger, healthier folk.

[powerwalk]

crikey - I know that feeling - I find I'm totally unable now for stressy things in work - and I'm stressed by anything I have to put thought into. I feel this overwhelming blank head and panic cos I can't get a grip on it. I think its from years of severe stress with a horrible boss and I blame that for this whole PMR thing. I don't handle stress now at all. The meds don't help.

[BonnyQuine in reply to powerwalk]

'. . overwhelming blank head and panic cos I can't get a grip on it.' I experience this when I have to do my personal 'accounts' at home. It's not so bad now, but was a huge problem during last year, when on higher doses of pred. I attributed it to the oft-mentioned 'brain fog'.

Generally speaking I've become slower and clumsier physically, and less sharp mentally. (currently on 7.5mg pred, down fr 40mg in Nov 2016). I used to be fast and accurate at mental arithmetic, but have to write down anything but the simplest calculations now. Am hoping that it will improve again as I gradually get off pred, but who knows?

You're right that stress makes it much worse. Aiming for a stress-free life, but find that's easier said than done.

[BonnyQuine in reply to BonnyQuine]

Just occurs to me to wonder if working through my kids' old 'common entrance' maths books - for fun! - might help. Practice? Might give that a go.