Thursday's Thoughts

[DonnaBoll]

Do you and your husband ( or significant other) really ever talk about your diagnosis?

I know for me, my husband rarely spoke about it. I feel this was because he never really came to grips with the idea that I was 'sick'..... I have no doubt that by not talking about it, I would be 'ok'. The fear of losing someone can be a powerful influence for not talking about a subject.

Having a conversation, I feel, admitting that sometimes how scared we are can give them a chance to say how they feel as well.

[4pjx__]

Same. He doesn’t usually discuss it with me. Sometimes when I bring it up he rolls his eyes. I feel like he’s in denial about the whole thing. I do have him come to my hepatoligist appointments with me but he says he thinks I’m fine. However, I’m not sure how I would feel about it if he didn’t think I was fine. Hahahaha! That might really freak me out!

-Pam

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to 4pjx__]

It's really hard to know whether to talk or not talk.... are husbands 'silent' about it because they don't care, they don't believe we're sick, or they are just afraid of losing us. Tough conversations. I can only hope we can always keep the conversations going. PBC is for the long haul... we need all the support we can get from those who care about us.

[4pjx__ in reply to DonnaBoll]

I don’t think it’s because he doesn’t care. I think he mentally just doesn’t want to deal with it

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to 4pjx__]

Exactly like my husband.. if we didn't talk about it, then I must be 'ok'. They love us and don't want anything to happen to us. It's just different for guys, I think.

[ortam]

Both my husband and grown children never bring it up. I think that as long as I’m being monitored by my doctors, they believe all is good.

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to ortam]

Every situation is unique. As long as they are there when you need them.... I have no doubt they are. Do you wish they would talk about it?

[butterflyEi]

My husband is a kind and considerate man but we do not talk about PBC. We support each other when one or other of us has to visit a doctor/specialist but a good deal goes over his head as he does not do "medical" stuff.

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to butterflyEi]

My husband is the same way about anything medical... being a nurse for over 40 years, he always felt I smelled 'like a hospital' when I got home. He would rather avoid it all. Even when I had my transplant and was in ICU. It was all he could do to come visit me. 🥴 but we know they love us!

[Gaspereaux]

My husband has read David Jone’s book and has attended a conference and an awareness dinner, but he is much like yours hubbies. He doesn’t bring it up unless I do.

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to Gaspereaux]

as long as they are there when we need them....they love us. That means a great deal on those 'not so good' days.

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to Gaspereaux]

Kudos to him for reading Dr. Jones' book!

[Gaspereaux]

Thank you, Donna! Yes, Bill is a bit of an introvert, and a man of few words. But he drives me to all my appointments (which can be up to 4 hours one way) and never says boo. He was right beside me when we met with the surgeon (cochlear implant in 2 weeks) as well. I am very grateful.

[DonnaBoll Administrator in reply to Gaspereaux]

🥰