awake with uncertainty

I wake

I wake but do not move

the day begins

I do not listen for the song birds

I do not lie in wistful wonder at dawn’s soft hues

No, I wake

But I do not move

Uncertainty

How bad is today going to be?

Will I stumble?

Will I fall?

I am awake

but do not move

I hear the sounds of my world waking

The song birds sing their “good mornings” to each other

A car offers a brief electronic chirp as my neighbor leaves for work

There is a rustling sound followed with “thump” “thump” “thump” and the soulful face of my “man’s best friend” peers at me from the floor beside my bed

Uncertainty

How bad will this day be?

Will I fall?

Will I get more than pride hurt?

I am awake

and I must move

I sit

I reach for the pills that trick my body

as I try to be me

Should I start this day with two?

Or three?

Is it time?

I am awake

Uncertainty collides with Faith

I stand

I step

I breathe

I listen

I move

7 Replies

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  • Thank you! Great poem!

  • thanks--no complete falls yesterday--grabbing wall doesn't count.

  • I suppose many of us lie there in bed uncomfortable, especially if we have had a bad night. But the most amazing thing for me is especially spring/summer seeing the dawn come up

    in early spring listening to the dawn chorus that really makes me think how precarious the lives of those birds are, yet there they are, singing away to attract mates or whatever.

    A new dawn is a new day we must live it the best we can I reckon.

  • I just wish you could think about how good your day will be. I loved your poem though, I know we are going through a lot but each day there are many blessings. We just have to count them.

    God Bless

  • thanks--I anticipate greatness each day --the dawn just breaks with PD's latest theft of the certainty that when I make way to start each day I won't fall along the way.

    FYI--my poems are the only dark thing about me--hence my pic of blowing bubbles for my parrot!

  • Morning's now best part of day. As I'm without pain. Any day I don't fall DOWN is good! I greet my guinea pig and open the blinds to see the sun reflected on the bricks of neighboring building. Very urban! Turn on the news and make coffee before my toes curl! Turn on computer and write on HealthUnlocked! Hey world :D

  • It's funny how our best/worse times fluctuate. 3 months ago mornings were not much of an issue! Now they are dreadful--and I love mornings. Cie la Vie. . .

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