Next Step

[Tess]

My oncologist has discussed my case with her colleagues at the Churchill Hospital in Oxford, (first line and op done privately), they think that I will be suitable for a trial they are running and I have to have another CT scan on Mondayand then first meeting with new onc the following Monday when I will find out the detail of the trial. In the meantime having been feeling really well, over the past week I have had constant consipation and tummy pains all this started with an episode of sickness, so am really starting to worry and panic about whats going on inside. I know its not long to wait but still feeling really down (am usually really positive and upbeat), even my new puppy can't take away my feeling of dread at the moment.:-(. Other posts recently have given me a reality check and as my diagnosis was Stage 4 high grade and aggresive I am now wondering how long it will be before things get really bad. Could do with hearing from anyone with similar stage and grade and how they are getting on.

sorry this is a bit of a ramble, but just needed an outlet for my thoughts at the moment, had a really good blub the other day, but don't want to bring those around me down as well.

Tess x

[Whippit]

Dear Tess

This is an awful time for you. You'and even through so much in a short time and it seems you're taking in a lot of information all at once. The one thing to keep in your mind is that you are not a statistic and this disease works in its own idiosyncratic way. I think it might be worth your checking out CathW's blog via the directory - I'm sure there are many others too. That should put some balance to what has up to now been a pretty miserable journey for you.

I think it's quite common to have tummy pains and an upset Boswell for a few weeks after the surgery while your body recovers from what is very invasive surgery. However if you're worried phone your oncology nurse or Ovacome. They are a great source of information and support.

Having an aggressive form of cancer isn't all bad news. I do too and my GP said they have a tendency to respond well to chemotherapy. My sister has had three different aggressive cancers in the last 38 years and she's as fit as a fiddle enjoying her remission.

Take heart. I'm sure you'll get many other responses that'll be a great support. Let us know how you're getting on. Xxx

Annie

[Tess in reply to Whippit]

Thanks Annie, its is a lot to take in, in such a relatively short time, and your right, my first line of Taxol/carboplatin I responded exceptionally well but in some ways that makes it harder to take when it comes back so quickly and then you can't have the same again. Just being able to put my thoughts on here helps a lot and the responses from all you lovely ladies.

I will let you know how things go. Tess xx

[Whippit]

Oops I meant 'upset bowel' not Boswell. Xx

[Whippit]

Dear Tess, I was rather embarrassed when I read my posts this morning. I was on a train using an I-Pad which has decided for itself what I wanted to write.

I'm currently awaiting my six month review. I responded very well to Carbo-Platin only but my GP has warned me that my type of cancer tends to respond well and return more quickly than others. I don't know whether it's better to remain in ignorance or to have a lot of information at our fingertips. Generally I've wanted to put it all to the back of my mind and keep to my usual routines as I've felt incredibly well throughout the last year. I know there are many women who don't have that blessing.

I didn't ask a lot of questions after my diagnosis and histology report. I somehow felt it can only get worse and I guess it won't be long before I have to face the details of the disease and whatever it throws at me. Some people might consider I've had my head in the sand but I don't believe this will make it any worse when I come to the next stage. I'll just get on with it and hopefully the examples of dignity and friendship that I've observed on this site will provide the guide and model as to how I should continue when things get tough.

This site has also been a huge comfort for me. I feel as if I have many friends out there who understand completely what I'm going through. We're privileged to have that.

Keep us posted. xx Annie

[daisycandoit]

Thank you to both of you for this, I have been in a bad way and felt very down but the latest round of chemo does seem to be working. Like you Whippit I do not get into statistics and maybe have a head in sand approach but it works for me in staying positive, I couldn't have the carbo/taxol or an op too soon after last treatment so all my eggs were in this basket! I was very down and I have had to start thinking differently again, love to you all, Diane xx

[MargaretJ]

Hi Tess!

I am really well at present! Stats are useless for individuals and just depress! If you are getting constipated contact your community nurses! I refer to mine as 'dynarod', before the colostomy all I had to do was call and they came round, sometimes several times in one day, with suppositories and/or enemas to clear the problem. My latest tumour was impacting on the anterior wall of my rectum before my gynae removed it and the bowel surgeon resected the bowel! Now I have this handy little bag! LOL!

I know it is when and not if the OC comes back but 'what if' wastes time and I focus on 'what is' and work hard to keep my PMA (positve mental attitude) we control freaks do need to feel we are still in control! LOL!

Stay positive by whatever means suits you and Live, Live, Live!

Love

Margaret

[Tess]

I too have a head in the sand kind of way of dealing with it all and staying positive, it does work for me most of the time. Margaret, I have plenty of laxatives which were prescribed for me during chemo and they do work too . One of my tumors was on the anterior wall of my recturm and had a part of it removed but fortunately didn't need a bag, but that is why I get more concerned about constipation. Thanks for your comments girls they all help us get through this and I will stay positive, having some Reiki next week which always helps.

Tess x