Hi lovely 😊 it is so difficult and knocks us for six when we lose our precious friends to this horrible disease. I feel exactly the same and so understand. Sending you hugs and love always xxx
Thanks for your contributions and I can understand why you feel this way. It can be draining with a lot of people struggling. Enjoy your life and feel free to pop back at anytime.
Can totally understand how you feel. It’s been so sad recently and becomes overwhelming. I really thought Harpist would beat this. 😢
I often wonder if I’m doing the right thing spending so much time volunteering for OCA as some weeks OC is all I seem to focus on. Very rewarding but I think after awareness month finishes I might have a break. We all need to find a balance.
We’ve got holidays to Scilly Isles and Watergate Bay to look forward to as well as my daughters graduation.
I meet up most months with some of the ladies from Guys so if you ever want to join us pm me.
Take care my lovely, thank you for all your positive posts, you were a great help to me after my treatment. Enjoy your beautiful family and fantastic holidays
I guess we all can relate, especially as this has been such a heartbreaking week after a heartbreaking month and a pretty sad year.
I have only been on here for a year and a half, but have found the group really helpful, when I have needed advice about treatment options and side effects.
Then, as I became more knowledgeable myself, it has been gratifying to be able to offer advice and insights to others.
We all know how stunned and basically ignorant we were before our diagnosis, so it is kind of nice, after finding so much support on this forum, to be able to give something back.
I am still in the ongoing treatment phase, so I will be sticking around for a while.
As I have healed so much this year, it hurts doubly that we have lost so many amazing women.
I understand your decision completely , the names that have gone have become so close to us despite in most cases never having met .Go and live your life and have some fun , we will still be here if you want to pop back .xxx
Completely understand how you feel. Every time we lose an amazing lady I am reminded of the spectre their waits in the shadows and it is hard to feel positive. I think LA’s passing has hit us all hard.
Caroles1 ...please when you are ready come back. Not all of us write on the site but roughly 95 -100% of people read the posts. Most of the time we are scared to respond for fear of rejection or making, stating a point that’s misconstrued as either rude, selfish or just plain ignorant.
Yourself and the friends you lost, they provided us (and you still do) an insight to the warmth strangers give - a community of sisters, brothers, husbands, daughters, sons and extended families. Grief is hard but the hardest decision many people make is sharing their knowledge and life experiences for the better of others. This site is the best of humanity, a rainbow of different credes, a force of unquestioned support, a rejector if binding governmental red tape and a fighting force of knowledge.
You said making new friends would be painful, you already had them- the unresponsive readers of your posts, your friends posts. The quiet prayers of love and support, the tears for the passing of a unknown stranger. We are here in the background, unannounced but present, uninitiated but very much a part of the structure. We are silent but we stand with you!
For me, my final belief is God bless you whatever decision you make, may your steps be on solid ground and may you find laughter, tears and joy fitering throughout your life - a rainbow of hope, love.
As one of the ladies who may have sadly contributed towards this decision ( I am having such a hard time right now) all I can say is - this post of your is beautiful. The kindness of these people who take time out to advise or just send hugs has the most incredible power to keep me going. And it proves how wonderful humanity can truly be. Please keep being here .. I so hope I don’t put anyone else off xxxxx
You would not put people off...your honesty is a step, a foundation stone that allows us all to accept our humanity. Never doubt yourself and take the time you need for you ...anyone can judge but the most important critic (the real self), is you - try giving yourself space, concentrate on spreading hope and sharing more ..you are helping the unseen women, men and family members not brave enough to write the words ‘I’m struggling’ ...the words you have written will have given more hope and help than you would ever be able to measure!
I totally get it and send you love and sure you need a break from it sometimes. Glad you’re honest and I’m sure so many people have been helped by you too in the past! Enjoy your life wherever it takes you x
Max, please never be afraid to respond to a post. Hopefully you will have seen that no one is rejected for offering their input, and it is so, so rare for anyone’s contribution to be misunderstood. That’s why I love this page so much. I find on platforms like Facebook people are pretty much looking for an argument, but that doesn’t happen here 😊
Your words to Carole are a perfect example of a perfect contribution. Thank you xx
Thank you for your kind words and support , it means a lot - I don’t reply as much as I’d like as I am severe sight impaired- but - after reading the comments - I recon a few misspelled words and blanks will be overlooked ...thank you for be inspiration in responding to my post!
You will be missed, but I also understand. Sometimes you need to step back,take a break for yourself. We all need to do that at times. Just look after yourself, make your days happy.....for us! Much love xx
Hi Carole, I take breaks from here too when it gets overwhelming. It's perfectly unstandable, it's high energy, high emotion and scientifically complex. Enough to scramble anyone's brain. I'm on the verge of taking a break on the run up to starting chemo again. I'm struggling with losses to this damned disease on and off this site and I need some headspace to enjoy my family and beautify my house before the onslaught. The traffic is very busy on the site and its difficult to be supportive all the time when you need the energy for yourself.
Go recharge you batteries, live life to the full and pop in if you have a query. All the very best to you Carole. 💐😘 Xx
Wishing you well with your journey- I do understand how hard it can be to lose our old friends on here- taking time away is the right thing for you. We will be here if ever you want to drop in... sending you a big hug 😘
I too am struggling with the ongoing grief from when another person falls. I have been feeling quite down and depressed, and need to pull myself out of it and focus on my health. Lily Anne was the straw that broke the camel’s back for me. All I can think of is the pain and suffering our sisters go through when the end is near, and it makes me very frightened for myself, and how I will cope. I have just come out of treatment for a recurrence, and while it has been pushed back again, I live with the fear that it will surely come back. I too have been considering having a break, not from you lovely ladies, but from the ongoing despair I feel. I love and respect you all, and I will be back, I just need a break to regroup and feel calm again. love Therese
I don’t want to break from the ladies either, just the losses, pain and suffering that I can’t do anything about.
I know where you are coming from, but, I find keeping myself busy so I don’t have time to dwell.
No one would blame you for getting on with life, me, I just feel I need to put it on the back burner, let others form relationships and maybe pop back in if anyone needs me.
In the meantime, enjoy life.......what do you have to lose? Xxx
Hi Carole. Sorry to see you leave the site but TOTALLY get where you are coming from. I sometimes wonder why I stick around. I wish you nothing but the very best for the future. Kathy xx
I understand exactly how you feel. The recent series of sad news has affected me far more than I would have imagined. I’ve cried for people I only know from this forum and it’s hard to take as it makes you think of your own mortality. I need to keep positive and concentrate on myself and my family. I might also need to come off for a while to help me keep focus. Wishing everyone well and I’m sure i’ll need to pop in from time to time. Take care Carol.
That’s how I feel, I don’t post often and not to be dramatic, but this has built up for a long time and LA passing that I have known (but not met) for nearly 4 years has finally got to me.
I think I just need to step back for a while, not unsubscribe as I first thought, but let you other lovelies give advice xx
Totally understand I am feeling the same, I have been positive all the way through this last 3 years but the sad news lately has given me some emotional tearful days.
I will stay on this site as these past few months have been difficult, and without the support I’ve received from the ladies on this site I would be in a much darker place.
Good luck Carol in your life and wish you well. It is heartbreaking to see these posts but right now I’m so glad some are staying - I’m so appreciative as I’m sure many have been to you too in the past - do
Thank you for all your kindness and support. While I have only been here 1 year, the last few months have been so sad, I really understand your needing a break. I hope you have many lovely times with your family and enjoy new adventures. 💐💗
I rarely write, but read everyday. I also follow several Facebook pages on the same topic. My husband read one of the sadder posts on FB the other day and asked me if I should be reading them. I'm a realist and know well what I have (metastatic clear cell...currently NED). I'll be staying connected for now because I learn so much from you ladies. I'll echo the thanks for your insightful wisdom and wish you well.
Hi Carole. I completely understand. We’ve lots so many great women. I’ve started to dread looking at this forum some days in case we lose any more. Thanks for all your contributions. You’ve done so well! Keep it up! 🤗
If it gets too much, just focus on your own case, since what is happening to others, isn’t what is happening to you.
It has what has got me through, this disease is not an “all size fits all”.I was only 1c (great) but had ascites and was given only 2 weeks to live, but with de baulking op and 6 months Chemo am still here 4 years NED.
It’s a rock and a hard place, you want support, but it’s hard finding out what is happening to others.
I have just decided to take a break, because sometimes it is too hard to bear
I was only thinking today that I wouldn't have got through the last 3 years without the advice and support from this forum. You have been one of those lovely women who have got me through. I understand how you feel. I just want to thank you and wish you happiness.
I agree Carole, it's so sad. I keep thinking of Lily-Anne and have had a few tears. I keep wondering how much longer I can go on with so many of our dear teal friends leaving us. I feel guiltier every day.
I wish you all the very best of luck and happiness. You know you'll always be welcome back.
You probably feel like me (survivors guilt) there is such a thing !
I am beyond sad for all the ladies that have left us, but LA did it for me.
I was going to leave completely, but have been overwhelmed by the contact, so, will just take a back step since I think new relationships need to be forged.
I don’t think I will ever leave, thought I could, just need a break,
Sending you love and complete understanding. It has been too heartbreaking on the Forum recently.. Enjoy your lovely grandchildren & immerse yourself in nurturing & fun times .
You've sometimes got to just pull back and look after yourself. I've been on this group since the very beginning and there are lots of us on here who are still here, still raising awareness, supporting others and feeling well. We maybe need to be more vocal as a counterbalance.
It's the nature of things with OC, that some of our friends don't make it. I keep them in my mind and my heart, miss them but feel I'll keep on, when real life permits, banging the drum about OC, better treatment, faster diagnosis and all that stuff.
I've taken lots of breaks from this site, I dip in and out. If I feel I can help anytime, I'll speak up.
It's fine to do that. Sometimes our own families or friends need us and we sometimes need to just hunker down and look after ourselves.
I am so glad you are still doing well. Ithink the long survivors need to band together to let joiners know a positive outcome can be achieved.(5 years and above)
Also (gates have been opened) I am so sick of it being supposedly our awareness month which seems to been hijacked by every women’s cancer awareness and any other thing, but not us.......why?
Big hugs caroles1, as a newbie I love reading your honest, heartfelt replies. Give yourself time as you've certainly been through a lot lately and hopefully we will all see you back here when you are ready xx
Just wanted to echo what others here have said about understanding where you're at just now & gratitude for all your kindness and posts. Wishing you and your family a rejuvenating time xxx Sundra
I am so sorry you have experienced one too many good byes on this wonderful forum. You wonderful long term ladies have been such great sources of guidance and information to so many of us. Enjoy life and have no regrets. Sending virtual hugs and positive good wishes. xx
I can’t add anything that hasn’t been said already, but totally understand the need for a break. I’m still fairly new to it all and need them already as I try to process all the information. Self care and time to relax and meditate to make the most of our lives are important.
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