Hello

I have literally just joined. I'm not even sure what for yet. Suffice to say my darling mum (aged 75) has just been diagnosed with ovarian cancer (well they say probable at the moment). She definitely has cancer, the fluid in her abdomen showed positive for cancer cells. Yesterday she had two biopsies taken as well as fluid drained from her lungs and abdomen. We are still waiting for the confirmation of ovarian cancer and the resulting treatment plan. She is in so much pain my heart is breaking. The waiting is tough.

I may well be using this site more as time goes along but in the meantime, hello.

11 Replies

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  • Hello JacBeth & welcome to the site although so very sorry to hear what your darling Mum is going through. There are lots of wonderful people on here with a whole wealth of knowledge and experience, which I'm sure you will find useful & a good form of support. For now, I just wanted to send you and your lovely Mum a jolly big ((hug)) as I know it all seems very scary just now. Jemima xx

  • Hi there and welcome :) sorry that you have to going through things like these. I like to say that all things were get right, one way or another. Try to be calm, I know it's hard, like real but lot of can do with medication today :) wishing to you and to your mom strenght !

  • Welcome Jacbeth (ha! the automatic spell checker changed your name to Macbeth but I spotted it in time). Although I never had fluid drained I understand that her pain could be much reduced soon. I expect some other ladies who did have fluid drained will be along to confirm soon.

    Waiting is really tough. I had a similar initial diagnosis, probably ovarian but it was only after a biopsy this could be confirmed. Once a treatment plan is in place, you'll both feel more in control.

    All the best to you both! Helen

  • Hi. I am sorry your are here for your mum. Welcome, please feel free to ask any questions and if we can help we will. Sending you a big hug. I know what it's like to watch your mum in pain :( . Kathy xxx

  • Hi JacBeth, welcome to what I hope, will be a good site for you AND your mum. I found this wonderful place after my diagnosis in March, have had major abdominal surgery, six sessions of chemo, ups and downs, hair loss and now Re-GROWTH !! nausea, sickness, smiles, advice and shared experiences.....all helped by the wonderful ladies, and some gents, who come here.

    Lots ahead for your mum, you will need to be strong with her, positive for her however never dismiss her fears with the dreaded phrase "everything will be ok" as that (in a weird way) dismisses our own thoughts. Just let your mum know you will support her, if she wants to be down then let her, if she wants to be hopeful then again, let her. As long as you are there for her, to support her in the way she tells you works best for her then that's so important.

    I've always kept a positive attitude which helped both me and my family immensely however At the beginning When I tried to talk with my hubby about what MAY lie ahead, especially when I was undergoing the round of multiple tests etc - he used to jump straight in with "everything will be ok" .....I asked him not to do that but to let me talk and not to dismiss my wanting to speak openly...he wanted to 'make it all better' but you can't!!!

    A plan will be put in place for your mum, maybe surgery, maybe chemo first. Go with her (if she wants) to her meetings so you can write down the answers, or even ask her questions for her, take a big pad of paper! etc.

    This Ovarian cancer life is doable, there are loads of different treatments for us, her team will sort out meds, pain relief etc but it is a bit shock to take in at first. She's joined the Teal Club' - a club none of would have picked however a club that supports it's 'members' , prays for, laughs with, shares experiences.

    Tell your mum that we are here for her too.

    Take care

    Clare 💐❤️👍🏻

  • Welcome to the site sorry you have to join us. We are a great group of ladies who help and support each other a lot. I am sorry your Mum finds herself in this position. I hope that one the fluid is drained her team will discuss a plan of action for her. It is of course a worrying time for you and your Mum. If you are in UK you can contact Ovacome Nurse here by phone or also Macmillan Nurses. I understand both are good sources of medical advice. I live in Ireland so not able to do so but we do have a support network as well. Once the fluid is drained your Mum should be much more comfortable. So its a hard time at the moment waiting for results and a plan. Once ye have a plan of action, then it is somewhat less upsetting. You mind yourself and come on here with any questions you may have,

  • Hello JacBeth. My mum was diagnosed at 77. She's had one recurrence and is battling on, living with the cancer, and has celebrated her 80th in October. Sending you a hug and stay positive. Send an update. Jane x

  • Hi JacBeth

    Welcome to the forum. I was diagnosed in January and am now clear after surgery and chemo. My daughter (and son) were by my side through it all and I can't tell you how wonderful that was. Never underestimate how important you are to your Mum and how much your support means to her. She is lucky to have you!

    Sending you both lots of virtual hugs.

    Lou x

  • To everyone that replied - thank you. It's nice to know you're all here.

    Since my previous post it's all got a little worse. I'm not even sure if it's ovarian cancer now that my mum has. It's spread and she is at stage 3 or 4a, according to her consultant. They are still trying to find out where the primary site is - I get this to mean that the cancer is now in so many areas they don't know where it started. She is still in hospital and today they are draining the omentum in her abdomen as well as an endoscopy, mammogram and more ultrasound. They want to get her eating again so she can go home and build her strength up for chemo.

    It's not great news. I'm amazed how fast she has gone down hill - this time a month ago she was walking her dog for 2 hours a day. Now, well now she can't get out of bed without help. The consultant has said she has a 5% of a full recovery with no recurrence in 5 years. 25% chance of recovery but with recurring cancer and the rest....well I don't think I can even type it.

    I feel like I've been hit by a truck.

    Sorry to be doom and gloom.

  • What can I say? It's good that they're trying to narrow down what is going on and your mum will almost certainly feel more comfortable now she's had the drains. Statistics are statistics, but they're made up of individuals and none of us know how things will turn out for us.

    T

  • I meant to say the only certain thing to focus on is she needs building up, so I'd try and concentrate on planning tasty and nutritious morsels to tickle her taste-buds.

    Good luck to you both xx

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