I have been considering making this decision for months now. However my mind always manages to find some reason why I don't need to......
. It helps with my anxiety
. I only smoke 5 a day
. I eat less when I smoke
. I know lots of people older than me that still smoke
. My husband smokes and Family members and it's enjoyable having a smoke togther
. Joanna Lumley smokes and she's older than me and she looks great!
. I enjoy it.
I could go on and on. I've almost convinced myself to go outside and have a smoke right now!
Instead I'll have to make a list of all the reasons why I should NOT smoke. I know there are MANY ! 😄
Does anyone else have certain situations or times during the day that they associate with smoking? If so what do you do to overcome the craving. My craving isn't so much for nicotine but for the actual habit itself.
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Yes! That was the worst thing for me - situations and times of the day that I associated with smoking:
Getting out of bed
One before going into work
Three at lunchtime
One on returning home from work
When waiting at a bus stop (discretely of course)
When walking anywhere which was further than 50 yards
When out for a drink
And many more...
I would encounter all of these situations and momentarily forget that I had quit. I would find myself reaching for my lighter in my pocket and then remember...
It was AWFUL but it starts to wear off pretty soon, once you have the quit mindset for a few days. Try to keep yourself busy as this takes your mind off the craving.
I hope this helps. How are you quitting? Cold Turkey?
Yes cold turkey. Is there any other way? Being the first day I'm really battling I must say. Im trying to keep busy and Im eating a lot but the need is constant today. Thanks for your reply, nice to know there are others that have been there and can give some support
Don't worry about eating a lot if it gets you through. As others have pointed out, you can always lose the weight later when the cravings have stopped. Good luck with the rest of the day.
Hello Becky I'm a trifle confused by your post why on earth would someone join a forum dedicated to quitting smoking if deep down they don't want to quit.
I suspect that you've not quite ready to throw in the towel in that you have the desire to quit but you don't want to quit. Personally I smoked for some 40+ years and it was smoking related ill health which left me with no other option; please don't go down that road. You've shown lets say an interest in stopping smoking, bite the bullet and go for the full monty because deep down you know within yourself that you want to.
I'm now some three and three quarters years nicotine free and thoroughly enjoying it.
Nothing confusing about it. I'm being honest. I love to smoke. If only it wasn't so bad for me. I'm just scared about what it will do to me if I continue. So I'm stopping and I've completed my first 24 hours now with lots of support from this forum.
Hi Becky
Welcome to the forum and good luck with this journey.
Funny your post, I was talking to a friend this morning and she was panicking because she is at the end of her pregnancy and she is afraid of labour.
I just told her that she is wasting her time and sanity over something that is not meant to.
Firstly, there is no away to avoid it.
Second, no one is going to do it for you.
It is horrible and painful but it's what comes out of it that matters, a all new beautiful life!
Hey....that applies to stop smoking completely, don't over think it, just do it.
Whatever the obstacles on the way, we will help you.
An issue is only a problem if you allow it to grow in your head.
I honestly used to have a list longer than my arm of reasons and excuses why I couldn't give up smoking Becky. I think my favourite excuse was that I would always quit 'tomorrow'.
I hated myself for smoking and so wanted to give up but I guess I didn't have what it takes.
I had many failed attempts at quitting that always ended in failure after a couple of weeks or so. A situation would arise (either stressful or social) when I would give in to temptation. I would tell myself that one cigarette wouldn't hurt and that I would go back to quitting 'tomorrow'. Of course one cigarette turned into one pack, and then another, and so on......
I finally asked myself if I REALLY wanted to quit!
About 8 weeks ago I started what I hope will be my final quit. I gave myself a good talking to and faced up to it - the pros and cons of smoking if you like. I couldn't find any pros at all!
It was hard at first and I missed smoking but I think all smokers do.
It's getting easier now and I know that smoking really is a losers' game.
I know that smoking is just an expensive and addictive habit and that we are only fooling ourselves by thinking we can't do without it.
Whether I actually can achieve what I'm aiming for and make this quit be a lifetime thing still remains to be seen but I know that quitting for good is much better than carrying on with a habit nobody really needs.
Believe me Becky, I've really exhausted all the reasons and excuses I've made for wanting to continue to smoke and at long last I've discovered that I can't find any.
Thanks Linda54. That's exactly the way I feel and you understand what I'm talking about. I DO want to quit but I always give myself reasons why I don't need to. Because I'm weak and because I like to smoke.
I'm now starting my second day. how I wish I was at week 8 like you. I've done it before and lasted 10 whole years. Why I ever thought it was a good idea to start again I don't know........
I'm trying to look at this from a different angle now. Smoking was just just a habit and a bad one at that. I had to hide away to do it and it made me feel like a criminal.
I've read that it takes 21 days to form or unform a habit, so that's what I'm aiming for now
Well done to you for getting this far! You have the right mindset.
Quitting is as hard or as easy as you want it to be. It's all in the mind so when you smoke you're choosing to do it.
x
Thanks for that. I dont want to make a big thing out of it, because that just makes it seem harder. However I have to admit that this time around I'm finding it a lot more difficult.
Ive been using cigarettes as such a crutch. I have general anxiety disorder and have been looking on my cigarettes as a type of relaxation medication. Whenever I feel stressed I automatically feel the need to smoke. So I need to find another crutch, but not a drug.
I kept one cigarette in my drawer for an 'emergency'. I know everyone will say "throw it away right now!" But at the moment I need to know that it's there.
I know this sounds bad but I have this fear of becoming so desperate and not being able to have access to my crutch. At the moment it just makes me feel better knowing it's there.
No not at all, my 2nd kitchen drawer is filled with packs of cigarettes and I have cigarettes on my bag all the time because my partner doesn't like to put the cigarettes on his pocket.
If you give me a bottle of whiskey, I will carry it around for a year and won't open it because I don't drink.
Hi Becky. It's understandable that you are still figuring out whether you should quit or not, and we can all find examples of people who lived long lives who smoked and healthy people who didn't, who died young. However, I suspect these are the exceptions, and so stand out. Apparently something like half a million people die every month worldwide of smoking related illnesses. Indeed, I read somewhere that the human mind assumes an activity (like smoking) is safe if adverse things don't immediately happen.
Rather than put too much pressure on yourself, just take it a day at a time and declare that you won't smoke today, rather than have to mentally handle all of the future in one day. Indeed, give it a few weeks and reserve the right mentally with yourself to smoke after that if you really want to. Then the pressure is off. You'll probably find you won't want to by then. In the meantime read up and make sure you
The mental struggle is more difficult than the physical!
I like MMaya's birth analogy 'It is horrible and painful but it's what comes out of it that matters, an all new beautiful life!'
I have been considering making this decision for months now. However my mind always manages to find some reason why I don't need to......
. It helps with my anxiety
. I only smoke 5 a day
. I eat less when I smoke
. I know lots of people older than me that still smoke
. My husband smokes and Family members and it's enjoyable having a smoke togther
. Joanna Lumley smokes and she's older than me and she looks great!
. I enjoy it.
I could go on and on. I've almost convinced myself to go outside and have a smoke right now!
Instead I'll have to make a list of all the reasons why I should NOT smoke. I know there are MANY ! 😄
Does anyone else have certain situations or times during the day that they associate with smoking? If so what do you do to overcome the craving. My craving isn't so much for nicotine but for the actual habit itself.
I read this with a wry smile as I could have written much the same in my smoking days. These days I would disagree with every single point - and that's one of the reasons it seems so very difficult to stop smoking, because you firmly believe what you have written. Once you change your mindset so that you see things from a non-smoker's perspective then you are a long way towards winning the battle.
Taking the last point first:
My craving isn't so much for nicotine but for the actual habit itself. Oh yes, I really believed that. Never mind that nicotine is one of the most addictive drugs in the world, I was somehow immune. Never mind that I found it impossible to stop, I was not an addict. Addicts take herion. Addicts take cocaine. I was a smoker, I just had a nasty little habit. We are all products of a society which deems smoking tobacco to be acceptable, but heroin and cocaine use to be unacceptable. We seldom refer to smokers as drug addicts; but strip away that social conditioning and there is no difference whatsoever. You are a drug addict, I am a drug addict. It's a very uncomfortable realisation, but the sooner we accept this we can understand the rules of addiction and start playing by the rules.
I enjoy it. Another favourite of mine. No you don't.😄 I know you think you do, but the reality is that you don't enjoy not smoking. It may sound like wordplay, but there is a world of difference between the two.
Joanna Lumley smokes and she's older than me and she looks great! Remember your reasons for wanting to give up. You have to give up for you. Who cares what other people do? JL has dodged the bullets so far, but she's still taking a huge gamble with her health. If you saw someone playing Russian roulette with a loaded gun, would you feel the urge to try it yourself, or would you think they were taking a ridiculous risk? We can all list people who've got away with it; similarly, we can all list people who haven't.
My husband smokes and Family members and it's enjoyable having a smoke together. Living in a smoking household can make quitting harder, but as above, remember your reasons for wanting to give up. These days, I can happily sit outside with a group of smokers and enjoy their company and conversation without the slightest pang or second thought for smoking, so don't ever think things won't be the same again, because they will be.
I know lots of people older than me that still smoke. And there will be people younger than you who have died from smoking. Is it a chance you want to keep taking? Using the behaviour of other people to justify your own actions really doesn't hold water.
I eat less when I smoke. This seems to affect some people more than others, but even if you pile on a few pounds during the quit, it really is a small price to pay in the great scheme of things, and the weight can always be tackled later on.
I only smoke 5 a day. Smoking is a binary thing, you either do it or you don't, and if you do it, then how much you do it is just a matter of degree. I've read of a person who only smoked two cigarettes a day but was still desperate to quit. If you smoke then you are in the grip of a drug, and in my own case I quit because I was absolutely sick and tired of being under that control. I guess you feel the same which is why you're here!
It helps with my anxiety. This must surely be my all-time favourite.😄 Of course, smoking wasn't exactly good for my physical health, but wow, it was just brilliant for my mental health. The sheer bliss of a cigarette, the relief from all the pressures of life. Non-smokers really just had no idea what they were missing out on! But what I hadn't realised was that the relief was an illusion. The ‘anxiety’ I was feeling was withdrawal pangs. The relief was simply shutting those withdrawal pangs up. That marvellous cigarette was simply solving the very problem it created in the first place. That is what smoking does - and that is ALL smoking does! It is a con-trick which all of us have fallen for for years. See it for the lie that it is, and stop falling for it!
So here you are contemplating stopping smoking. Your rational conscious mind tells you that to carry on smoking is crazy. It costs a fortune. It steals your health, it steals your energy, it steals your self pride. You stink. People look at you in disgust.
And yet....
Still you carry on, without really understanding why.
Certainly there is no physical health benefit - maybe it's because of the miraculous mental health benefits?
- when you're having goods times it's there to celebrate with you
- when you're having bad times it's there to commiserate with you
- when you're stressed it's there to relax you
- when you're bored it's there to engage you
Whatever the situation, whatever the mood; tobacco, your marvellous friend, is there to enhance and improve the experience. As a smoker, this was my reality. This is what kept me smoking for over thirty years.
If you're struggling to stop, then open your mind to the fact that this 'reality' is a complete illusion. It's a very powerful illusion granted; so powerful that many remain under the spell until it kills them. It's not until you've put in a few months since your last cigarette that you can see it for the lie that it is.
Your marvellous 'friend' creates the illusion of enhancing and improving any given situation by removing the withdrawal pangs created by the last cigarette you had - in other words, it helps you feel 'normal' again, but the only reason you stopped feeling normal in the first place is because of your last cigarette.
Tobacco gives the very convincing impression that it is helping you, when the reality is that it created the problem in the first place. It holds out its hand to support you, yet it laughs behind your back.
Thank you so much for this post AnEggisAnEgg. Everything you say makes sense to me. It's helped my mindset so much and I'm going to keep it and refer to it each time I need to. A big big help for me as I start my Day 6
Hi Becky..... A question I have asked myself a Zillion times: How important is it really that you feel satisfied right now for 2 minutes, compared to getting yourself free from addiction forever? and the answer was always that it will be much wiser to be free from this terrible addiction and take control of my own life forever...Stay strong !!
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but the need is constant today. Thanks for your reply, nice to know there are others that have been there and can give some support
