Hmm well I wasn't expecting to feel like this today. I was fine this morning. Finished work at 1, came home and now I really want a cigarette. I mean really want one. I won't have one. That's not just me trying to convince myself, I mean it, I really won't have one. It has just surprised me how much I want to smoke.
To be honest I think I am lucky in that I have never really struggled too bad with the initial quit, I struggle with the staying quit. The longest I stopped was 7 years, during which time I got super fit, trained heavily in the martial arts and was generally on top of my game. One cigarette changed all that. The last decent quit I had was for 6 months last year, and again one cigarette put an end to that. I suppose I was expecting to get through this initial stage and had just beware further down the line when the dust had settled. Guess today is a reminder of how much I need to keep my guard up. It probably doesn't help that it is cold, wet and miserable outside and I am bored!
Right, apologies if this is a bit garbled, my brain isn't properly in gear today! Writing this post however has been cathartic, and now I feel more positive. I was never going to smoke today, just p****d that the dirty s*ds are taking over my brain! Now, wheres the mini eggs....?
Keep fighting the good fight people