Hello folks, Doing ok at day 12. Im still using the spray but im leaving it at home when i go out or its spray spray spray! I plan on cutting the spray out this weekend if possible (might be quite or extremly busy not sure yet) but tbh im not getting bogged down with the hurry of that!
A few smoking observations today. This morning i was GAGGING for a fag, dont know why just was. I remembered from whyquit that are blood sugar levels change as a non smoker, had some toast and well i was ok.
Second observation was I feel really meh today, abit dragging myself about. Intital thoughts were 'oh god dont get depressed again'! then i remembered...Ive had two late nights and early starts...I would feel the same as a smoker, maybe worse! lol
Its just funny how we assume sometimes that everything we feel is because were not smoking, when in fact its just normal (we this happens to me anyways).
I could have bought some fags today, my head wanted to, but my heart doesnt want to smoke! The addiction wants me too, but i can hear myself in backgound saying 'i dont want to smoke'. I know it sounds silly, but i really am starting to come to grips with what this all about. whats MY feelings and whats the ADDICTIONS feeling are seperate, and its understanding what is what that makes or breaks a quit
I know I want to quit, or I wouldnt bother so many times. Im very determined though, I dont want to let myself down. I deserve better than a ****ty life smelling and feeling half dead! xx