Day 12 - smoking observations

Hello folks, Doing ok at day 12. Im still using the spray but im leaving it at home when i go out or its spray spray spray! I plan on cutting the spray out this weekend if possible (might be quite or extremly busy not sure yet) but tbh im not getting bogged down with the hurry of that!

A few smoking observations today. This morning i was GAGGING for a fag, dont know why just was. I remembered from whyquit that are blood sugar levels change as a non smoker, had some toast and well i was ok.

Second observation was I feel really meh today, abit dragging myself about. Intital thoughts were 'oh god dont get depressed again'! then i remembered...Ive had two late nights and early starts...I would feel the same as a smoker, maybe worse! lol

Its just funny how we assume sometimes that everything we feel is because were not smoking, when in fact its just normal (we this happens to me anyways).

I could have bought some fags today, my head wanted to, but my heart doesnt want to smoke! The addiction wants me too, but i can hear myself in backgound saying 'i dont want to smoke'. I know it sounds silly, but i really am starting to come to grips with what this all about. whats MY feelings and whats the ADDICTIONS feeling are seperate, and its understanding what is what that makes or breaks a quit :D

I know I want to quit, or I wouldnt bother so many times. Im very determined though, I dont want to let myself down. I deserve better than a ****ty life smelling and feeling half dead! xx

8 Replies

  • Thanks Debbieh does make this whole thing that little bit easier tbh! not having a fight with myself all the time lol xx

  • Go Nikki!!!

    Sounds like you're motoring along this time!

  • The early days are hard Nikki, nobody can deny that. You have to dig in deep and remember that it gets easier, otherwise no one would be able to quit would they? Keep going and I promise you, you will think about it less and it will become much more manageable than it is now. I found it really hard at first, but I had smoked for over 40 years:eek: I can honestly say after the first 3 weeks it got so much easier. You do sound determined and I think you should pat yourself on the back for making this decision. The best decision you will ever make.:)

  • Hang in there Nikki. It really does sound like you have it sussed this I've though!

  • Hey Nikki....

    You are right it is all in the mind. Strong will and determination are the nico 's worst Enemies and while you are thinking like that you will be a winner !

    For me personally, it's the fear of smoking. I scared myself silly in the beginning with all the smoking deaths and illnesses. Plus for me it's been long enough now that if I do ever take that puff it WILL HURT !

    It will get easier and so will those thoughts of fags that's for sure so just you keep going :) x

  • Nikki it's just constant mind games. I had a blip after 10 months being nic free - I just let my guard down for a moment. I wonder if a lobotomy would help :D

    Woo - like the don't stink no more.... I find it amazing how much smoking does stink - and I mean stink. I can smell a smoker while driving and following a car even if their windows are up.

  • No way dicko! lol are your exagerating or is that really true!? Im at the point i can smell a fag as soon as its lit in another room so i guess after so long it can only get stronger your sense of smell! xx

  • hi

    Oh no had a few alcoholic drinks and struggled a bit tonight but still haven't had a single puff even although my husband is still smoking. This has been the hardest night so far. Going to take this as a positive keeping going no reason to smoke!! Thinking about reading Allen Carr who would recommend? Xx

You may also like...