Am I going to be ok?

Hello everyone,

This is my first post although I have been 'lurking' for about 2 months. I love this forum and it has been such an inspiration and source of support. In fact, I feel that some of you are my closest friends, such has been the benefit of your posts.

Anyway, I am using champix and stopped smoking 31 days. Yesterday, my practice nurse diagnosed me with asthma and moderate copd. She said my lung capacity is 63% and that's as good as it's going to get. I've to use a symbicort inhaler twice a day and she'll review me in a year.

I am gutted. This is the first time I have tried to quit and was beginning to feel good about myself and this has just upset me so much. My mum died 16 months ago from copd. It was about 5 years from her diagnosis to her death but she had survived breast and cervical cancer prior to copd.

I know I chose to smoke but my decision to quit was to reclaim 'control' and was quietly so proud of myself but now all I can think of is 'I want a cigarette' and I'm struggling not to give in. Does it ever get easier? People on here have said they have had days where they don't even have a single thought about a cigarette -will that ever happen for me?

Any advice or thoughts would be greatly appreciated and sorry for my rant.

13 Replies

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  • CupCake,

    I don't know much about your diagnosis somebody else will know more about that stuff.

    But I do know for sure that smoking now will definitely not make a single thing better for you, it never has and never will. So keep up with the quit and remember it is better to have this diagnosis you have and NOT be smoking rather than smoking.

    Keep at it.

    Paul

    Ps . Welcome and you are doing really really great. You are in the right place.

  • Hi cupcake, and welcome.

    Ranting is accepted here (and even expected!). I'm glad you decided to take the plunge, join us, and let us know what's happening for you.

    31 days stopped is excellent. That achievement looks exactly like someone who is purposefully reclaiming control in their life, well done.

    It's a tough place that you find yourself, and I admire the feeling of bravery that comes through when reading your post.

    As I understand it the main cause of copd is smoking. Having a fag, and then re-starting smoking will make it worse. I suspect you know this already.

    It seems like everything's catching up with you all-of-a-sudden, with the intensity of feeling creating a wave of craving. Hold steady and concentrate on getting to bed tonight without having a smoke. Try not to think any further ahead than that.

    You have our support and encouragement. Feel free to keep posting - this evening and tomorrow morning. :)

  • Hi Cupcake

    Congratulations on quitting - you've done so well. You've got over the worst part of quitting - yes, it gets better - you'll just have to believe me there: it really does get better even though it seems at times that it never will.

    As for your lung capacity, you are really doing the right thing to stop it from worsening. Smoking would make things so much worse, and in your case the fact that you've quit is the best thing you can do for your health.

  • Cupcake,

    I really feel for you - to get such stressful news at a time when you're trying to quit such a pervasive habit, you're bound to want to resort to smoking. But I don't need to tell you that the very worst thing you can do for your health - the thing that will be absolutely guaranteed to make your copd worse - is to smoke. So you really need to grit your teeth and work through this without resorting to lighting up.

    I can give you an absolute cast iron, one hundred percent guarantee that if you keep going with this you WILL reach the stage where not smoking is easy. I can't tell you exactly how long it will take because it's different for everyone, but it will happen.

    And I know that for some people on here who have had health problems - including COPD - a few months of smoke free life have made a really positive difference to their breathing. I'm sure they'll pop up on here to lend their support :)

    You can't change the past, but you can take control of your life now. You are stronger than this stupid plant. And if you look after yourself you can still have a good quality of life. Keep that at the forefront of your mind, keep posting here, and hang tough. You can do this.

    Helen

  • hanging in there

    Thanks for all the replies. I'm feeling a bit better and haven't given in! I'm off to bed now so fingers crossed, tomorrow will be a better day :)

    I'll keep everyone posted of my progress and thank you for making me feel so welcome and for your words of support.

  • Well done Cupcake. You've proved you can handle a tough crave, not give into it and so get through it. Nice one! :D

  • Hi Cupcake

    I've only just caught up with this thread, but I really feel for you. I have a friend who's just turned 50, has been told her lungs are those of a 94 year old, and who will not, "cannot", give up smoking.

    This is the first time I have tried to quit and was beginning to feel good about myself

    You have EVERY reason to STILL feel good about yourself. Your 'old' (habitual) way of coping with bad news would be to light up. We return to habits we felt 'helped' us. In the case of smoking, we were conned! You KNOW this is not what you want to do or who you want to be. You have come such a long way and done SOOOOOO well.

    Will it get easier? Better? You bet it will. Just hang on in there. Rant, rave, do something else, do anything it takes. The alternative doesn't bear thinking about. You can do it. And we are all here to help.

    Sue

    xx

  • still hanging in there :)

    Hello all,

    Just wanted to say I'm still hanging in there and feel less like 'my life is over' and more like 'I'm not going to let this beat me'.

    Thanks popo 72 for being the first to reply,

    Thanks biggrin for saying I'm brave,

    Thanks karri for sharing your story about your mum

    Thanks nonico for saying things do get better,

    Thanks helsbelles for being so telling me to hang tough

    Thanks here-we-go reminding me of my achievement

    xoxo

  • Hello all,

    Just wanted to say I'm still hanging in there and feel less like 'my life is over' and more like 'I'm not going to let this beat me'.

    Thanks popo 72 for being the first to reply,

    Thanks biggrin for saying I'm brave,

    Thanks karri for sharing your story about your mum

    Thanks nonico for saying things do get better,

    Thanks helsbelles for being so telling me to hang tough

    Thanks here-we-go reminding me of my achievement

    xoxo

    It's touching the way you have replied. I know people on here are supportive, but somehow your post makes that plain for everyone to see, lovely.

    Well done for hanging in there, you're doing really well.

  • Awww, thanks biggrin :o

  • Cupcake

    Your first post you sounded a bit vulnerable and asked 'does it get easier'?'

    You've answered your own question a few days later saying 'I'm feeling much better'.

    You're doing just fine Hun, well done:)

    Fi x

  • Thanks nutmeg, xo

    Struggling this morning and just posted in month 1....this is such a roller coaster ride!

  • It certainly is a roller coaster ride but what a thrill when we can say I don't smoke:D

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