Hi all
i have made day 10 am on 21 mg nicotine patches and have been struggling initially do feel as though its getting better though but have tough days and better ones.
I have mixed emotions is this normal
if i tell you a bit about my story and why im quitting may make a little more sense
I broke my leg last year 2 days before my wedding in cyprus was devastated well had to cancel and rearrange wedding as i had a metal plate as broke my leg in 3 places
well i struggled to get back on my feet still smoking 20-30 a day since i was 15 now 38 with 3 kids and a hubby.
i was told back in april my leg had not healed due to smoking amongst other things no one knows but smoking has been shown to inhibit bone healing in fractures. Yet i still smoked I went in in july to have another op a bone graft and anew plate put in and am now four weeks into my recovery stuck in my house no weighbearing only in a wheel chair and crutches which is bliddy hard at the moment as no work cannot look after the house etc properly but thats another story.
anyway went back 2 weeks ago to have stitches out at hosptial post op saw a different doc and he wiped the floor with me told me i was at serious risk of my leg not ever mending if i didnt give up.
I did try and explain my addiction and that i would try my best, i came home booked in with smoking nurse at gp and hence here i am 10 days on on inhalator and patches which i am very proud of as i really didnt think i could go 10 hours yet 10 days
What im trying to get at with the emotion thing i have thought of all the benefits ie more money health my leg, smell etc and the only thing that motivates me is my leg nothing else which saddens me as i am of the thought sometimes when my leg is healed i can go bqck to smoking then i think no i am not gonna do this a if i can go 3 months why on earth would i put that first cigarette back in my mouth but at times i feel depressed and do miss smoking even though i know this is stupid.
i think i have also struggled as i am literally bed bound and housebound not independantly mobile so all the tips of keeping yourself busy to try and help cravings i cant do due to my leg. It also gives me more time to think about the evil things too - like that was all i had to look forward too at home etc.
I have come out in spots on my face and chest area is this normal. i have lurked around a few sites and then 7 days in had a major hangup about doing it with nrt rather than cold turkey- felt like i was cheating etc and all the horror stories about me prolonging my addiction so i decided to not put a patch on to see if could manage cold turkey and guess what went to light a fag within an hour of waking luckily i saw sense and as i lit it made me feel sick and i put it under water and threw it in the bin i was so angry.
Sorry my post was so long just had a bit to get off my chest. Admire and applaud and take great belief in all the peeps that have and are conquering their non smoking lives its great