Lesson Learned

When I joined this forum, I thought that it would be a good place to learn about the phenomenon of quitting smoking, to share my own experiences, help me with my recent quit, and to help my girlfriend with her own efforts to quit.

Firstly, I would like to thank the many who have supported me and appreciated my support.

What I didn't realize is that apparently there are some members of the club who feel that the only way to be a worthy contributor is to suffer along with everyone else and agree with (or ignore) everything that is said. For me to challenge someone's negative attitude toward their ex-smoking friends, or to point out that the need to see other people suffering in order to feel good about oneself is not a good thing, that resulted in me being publicly lynched. A lesson learned.

I'm not struggling with my effort to quit, and I don't see why I should be scorned for having an "easy time." In fact, that attitude came as a result of realizing that I could be dead or die soon enough if I don't change my lifestyle. It could just as easily happen to you. I hope not.

From now on, I shall try to refrain from making any comments when I see attitudes that anger me, but please don't expect me to say "Baah!" either.

My tip, as it has been before is to take responsibility for your own quit!

Rant off.

Michael.

7 Replies

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  • Hey Michael,

    Just keep doing what you are doing in your quit. People do not always get along online, just as in real life, so I always just take it all with a pinch of salt :)

    If someone doesn't like what I say, I usually ignore them in life (I am a pansy and hate confrontation), and therefore online I try and follow the rule of only saying in type what I would be willing to say to the persons face if I met them in a pub! Havign said that, once I get a feel for a person I will develop something of a backbone (I think my sort-of OH would agree!).

    Just focus on your quit and supporting those who want your support would be my suggestion! Just as in real life we do not expect EVERYONE to understand us, so to the virtual world.

    Anyway, once again no idea if I am making any sense :p:p

  • Hi Michael,

    Isnt it strange, I would never have believed a few years ago that we would be able to talk to people live online. I would much less have believed that I would be one of these people.

    And I am amazed to find that you can really like or really dislike someone who you have never met. But its just a way of life now. I have a person on another forum that I utterly detest, she would probably be horrified to find that out, and she has not said anything to me personally. Strange or what?

    But as in life there are people we like and dont like, we just have to get on with it, vive la difference. ;)

  • I totally understand your post Michael but don't you think this is the sort of thing that would make people even angrier? I'm not saying you should just shut up and go away because of people that don't like you but to make a 'statement' like that may look to others like you're looking for unnecessary confrontation.

    I'm very happy for you that your finding your quit so easy, you really do seem to have the right persepective (one which is very similar to Allen Carr's - lucky for you :)) and I can understand that it may frustrate you to see others suffer through their quit instead of enjoying it like you are. HOWEVER, you cannot make some of the comments you have made and NOT expect some people to be angry. Sometimes your comments do not seem like they are there to challenge people about their ideas but they look like they are simply condescending and rude...

    Of course, like Genes has said, a lot of things get taken out of context online because no one can read emotion in typed messages. I hope everyone keeps an open mind about this because things are very tense in this forum and this post only will make it worse I think...

  • Yeah saying all that though Micheal................

    Everyone enjoys a public lynching :D :D

    I personally find most of your posts direct and challenging, although I can see why some people might get rubbed up the wrong way.

    Keep up the good work

  • Right there with ya LOL...

    Uhmmm, I wouldn't take it all that seriously! Humans are a weird bunch really, especially females, we have the freedom to change our minds any time LOL....

    Dang it is so cold here today, minus 14 C, I am SO GLAD I don't have to step outside to smoke ;)

    That just on the side...

    I am having a pretty good time with my quit right now as well but due to this forum, and ONLY this forum, I know to be just a bit on the cautious side and will be prepared if I all of a sudden have strong urges.... not to give in etc. Without this forum I would have thought I'm home free and did it, but reading all the other's posts, I know I'm not there yet :)

    :)

  • Suppose your right, so no lynching then?

  • OOOhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I wanna do some beating of people, pretty please :D:D

    Would prefer to beat people who work for our local electricity suppliers, but in their absence....

    ***grabs a big stick and smiles menacingly****

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