I feel angry and devalued.: Today, in our... - Kidney Dialysis

Kidney Dialysis

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I feel angry and devalued.

Mich1949 profile image
9 Replies

Today, in our dialysis unit, we have an unusual number of agency nurses. Most of them are are from India.During my session this morning, the nurse looking after me today ( also from India) decided to do a flow test check on me, by hooking me up to a machine that checks the flow rate. This happens maybe once a month or so

The nurse who usually works here was today accompanied by two other agency nurses

The three of them seemed quite unsure of how to use the machine, and started talking to each other in their own language, totally ignoring me. Usually, when the test is done, the nurse will explain what is going on, and lets me have a look at the screen, to see how the test is progressing. That didn't happen today. The three totally ignored me, and turned the screen away from me, chatting to each other in their language.

It may sound absurd, but I almost felt violated - as if I was a lump of meat lying on the couch, to be totally ignored during the procedure. No one even told me how the test went; they all just totally ignored me.

Am I being over sensitive?

I have to say that I have no problem with being looked after by any nurse of whatever race; I get on very well with most of the nurses, wherever they come from, but today left me angry, feeling totally devalued.

Am I being unreasonable by feeling so upset?

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Mich1949
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9 Replies
Bassetmommer profile image
Bassetmommer

That is an inexcusable way to treat a patient. I am sorry you went through that. They should have not excluded you nor spoke in a manner that you did not get to understand.

I am dealing with a lot of anger about the whole dialysis process in general. I will explain soon as right now, my anger is so strong and I want to temper my words. The whole process of dialysis is dehumanizing but the alternatives are limited.

I would see the charge nurse for your center and explain what happened. What ever happened to patient-centered care?

Mich1949 profile image
Mich1949 in reply to Bassetmommer

Thank you for your reassuring reply. I am sorry to hear you are feeling angry too. Maybe I shouldn't have posted whilst feeling so bad! I just felt I had to " put pen to paper", just to feel a little better.

Please post your grievance; don't let it fester -it won't do you any favours.

Take care..

Ziggydoodah profile image
Ziggydoodah

I'm based in Scotland and this has happened to me on a couple of occasions. I was a bit shocked at first and I did think it was a bit rude the first time it happened. However one of the nurses involved is one of my favourite nurses. I notice they sometimes do this, if they are stressed or trying to work something out. Maybe on these occasions they slip back into their own language to communicate better??? I think they would be horrified if they knew they had made you uncomfortable. Dont be afraid to ask them for the results. One thing I have learnt in 18 months of dialysis, get your voice heard!!!Not happy about something, tell them. Remember you are sitting for 4 hours. You can sometimes overthink things, I know I do. If it happens again, nip it in the bud. It was unprofessional and wrong.

JEanes55 profile image
JEanes55

I would tell them if they can’t speak English, then don’t come to my machine. What they did was not right!!! Speak up for yourself. Telling the charge nurse is right.

lowraind profile image
lowraind

I would certainly report this to the manager of the unit. Usually it is older females who are treated this way. Welcome to our world!

horsie63 profile image
horsie63

Oh I'd have been so angry and would have said something then and there..once I was unhooked of course. I'd complain to the head of the unit. Sometimes when the neph comes around he'll talk to the nurse following him around but he always explains what he's said to her. I no longer accept what they say as gospel so I want to know exactly what's going on.

Darlenia profile image
Darlenia

I'm first generation European (Netherlands) in the US so I grew up in a family where English wasn't the precedent. Then, I left home for the Mid-Atlantic - a beautiful mixing bowl of people from around the globe speaking a variety of languages. And traveled to Asia and elsewhere. I've noticed it's quicker and safer for people to trouble shoot issues in their native languages - it reduces the margin for errors on their end. I don't take it personally. When I feel left out when these discussions happen, I simply ask for explanations. People are lovely in that regard and quick to accommodate. Interestingly, some speak 5 or more languages! (I wish I spoke more.) I suspect we'll see more languages being spoken in our communities as time goes on.

KidneyCoach profile image
KidneyCoachNKF Ambassador

Nope. I don't think you're being overly sensitive nor unreasonable. This is the time to speak up for yourself! Advocating for yourself should help to remove the second guessing and personal negative emotions. Speak up! Speak out! Blessings

drmind profile image
drmind

Speak up. Should have done it right away, but you can still let them know. It's never too late. Sounds as if they were teaching each other. So, it would have been a great time to tell them WHAT YOU WANT. Best not to take it personally. You can easily change this behavior by letting them know how you felt

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