My son was 32 he keep having headache they kept saying sinus infection after 4trips to er and different meds he woke me up and couldn't walk back to his room I called the ambulance he was taken to the hospital where they finally did a CT scan he had a brain bleed flown to another hospital where they operate on him and he died 4hours later yes I hired lawyers cause if they would have done a CT scan earlier he could have been saved
Loss: My son was 32 he keep having... - NHS England: A Ca...
NHS England: A Call to Action
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Loss
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Penny1954
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Hello Penny1954,
My heartfelt sorrow for your loss. What a dreadful way in which to have lost a son and I can understand that, not only are you grieving, but that you feel that there was some kind of neglect at not getting his diagnosis right first time, leading to his death.
But sadly, quite often, not getting it right first time doesn't necessarily mean there was any neglect.
Still, it's a good thing to ask all the questions you can about the medical protocols that were followed, including seeking the advice of solicitors. You will be able to be legally represented to try to get to the truth of it all if it seems anything was missed out in diagnosis or treatment. You owe that much not to your son, but to you too.
Whatever happened you must feel bereft and very angry. Anger's a really big part of grieving and it's probably twice as strong when you fear something could have been done to save him, but wasn't.
I'm quite sure there's nothing I can say that could comfort you, but I send my warmest best wishes to you, and I hope that, at some point in time, your grief will lessen a little bit, even though it won't ever completely go away.
Penny1954 in reply to
Thank you for the kinds words yes I feel very angry he was my only child he complained of headaches after taking him to 4differ doctors he was still miss diagnosed just because I begged them to do a CT scan he had great insurance nothing can bring my son back but maybe if someone takes or goes there with severe headache they will do a CT scan and save their life 63 and my son lived with me after he had a heart attack 5yrs earlier I feel lost pain and if I could have changed places with him I would have
Hello Peny1954.
I am really sorry to hear what has happened to your son. I lost my son in 2016. I know every one is different but I can understand your pain. And I know you will not believe me right now, But I promise you that time does heal many wounds. You will never forget him, remember the good times.
Unfortunately what has happened to your son is too common these days. You have not given a date of when this has happened. I assume it must be recent. It is your right to know what happened and what should have happened and who is responsible. If a CT scan was required to diagnose your Son's problem it was his human right to get one. This is not the place to go into detail, bottom line is in order to make sure this does not happen again to any one else, the truth needs to be out.
Unfortunately even though there are regulations specifically CQC regulation 20 to make sure you get the truth. NHS machinery will be more concentrated on damage control. Unless you know your way around the system they will attempt to deceive you preying on you lac of knowledge. 1st thing you need to start to do is to save all letters and e-mails you receive and record every conversation you have with any member of the NHS. They will try to get you to say things that they may interpret, in you asking them, you would rather not be disturbed or contacted.
Yes it will be difficult as they are trained in sliding things under the carpet and deceive people, specially risk managers, and Medical directors, and they know you have never been in this position and they will use this. But stay strong and as get your self a cheap audio recorder and record everything. Constantly remind them of Statutory duty of Candour. Spend more time with family. It helps. Make it a point to spend time with people every day. At this point until you are out of the shock phase, do not get in touch with a solicitor. Soon as you do and the NHS finds out, they will not speak to you. All contact will be cut off.
I hope I have been more help then trouble.
Hello Penny1954. I'm extremely sorry to hear this and it pains me that things keep going wrong when so often we hear later on that lessons should have been learned yet still they have not . I lost my son ten years ago this year when it was so obvious NHS attitude and treatment was wrong. Take the advice given above "ask all the questions you can about the medical protocols that were followed, including seeking the advice of solicitors".
Medical protocols were not followed in my sons case and the 'might' of NHS was brought to bear when they lied in investigation, lied to the HM Coroner and lied again when I made legal Claim. I made that claim after trusting the health services ombudsman to see through all the denials and see the sense in correct procedures and learning which could have been seen.
The PHSO turned out to be totally dishonest, never did what they said their job was, never got to the bottom of the negligence by our GP and secondary services because none of them could go back and admit they had messed up after their original lies. It's taken nine years now and the PHSO has still not resolved the case and has added injury in mocking me and my evidence, mocking me for being angry and just wanting answers to question which should never have arisen but did so because the PHSO was so ignorant of health matters and devoid of any skills in intelligent rigorous investigation. If the NHS just stick to the little they recorded (due to other maladministration) it sticks as the 'only' truth. Your experiences do not count and you will be labelled a troublemaker for asking.
Remember that going to a solicitor relies also on their skills in that field and it can only end in a potentially meagre monetary settlement - which NHS may offer yet still deny any wrongdoing, unless a definable wrong was actually recorded in their notes, which would be unusual. They don't like to document negligence and may, not so cunningly, alter any records after the fact or hide anything revealing, which they did in my case and many others in the public domain.
If there is an inquest make sure you are legally represented through you solicitor, so the right questions can be asked. PS: you may find that the costs for this are covered by your house insurance legal cover which might also cover a specialists report which could be useful if you then make a legal claim.
For me this whole unnecessary fiasco has ruined the last 9 years of family life on top of the avoidable loss of my lovely, honest, decent son who happened to get ill.
The stress and further trauma of fighting your side can destroy you so make sure you get good support and do not take no for an answer from anybody. They will not understand your pain and will be keen to close any case brought or questions asked.
I wish I had asked so many questions before my son died, and also wish I had made more detailed notes about events and the people who had been involved. At the time, the negligence seemed so obvious but we were not 'informed' on matters. Some of the negligent professionals are still employed in 'business as usual' possibly unaware of their effects on my son and our lives since. Some should have been struck off health employment but potentially went on to harm others because no action was taken. This is the NHS, unfortunately, and it's getting worse.
Beware: If you do approach the PHSO be sure to get your evidence backed up by research and professionally presented because they are not the 'independent' body they claim to be. Their primary job is to close down cases with as little noise or admission as possible, taking as long as possible so that facts are lost to history. They have shown me they've learnt nothing in 9 years except how to back-track in high profile cases where they suddenly realise they could not get away with their previous denials. Take plenty of private advice and firstly look after yourself and your own health. None of what happens makes for easy reading and paints a poor picture of what still goes on in 21st century behind the scenes.
It's all very sad and I hate to hear of it happening again and again. So sorry. Hope this helps with regard to being Informed. Apologies if it's all a bit too much but get all the advice you can from independent sources.
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