hi, I have a 1 year old. 17 months to be exact. She was born at 26w5d gestation so she is a little bit behind. Her sleeping schedule continues to be anywhere from 8am to 1am depending on the kind of day she’s had but I have no idea when she wakes up, let me explain.
I am her mum. When she was first born I woke up exactly every 4 hours to feed her when she was due except she was in a hospital an hour away from where I lived and in those 10 weeks of NICU my body gradually got out of that routine so my partner took the mornings and I did the rest of the day. However, this isn’t the case.
Since December started I’ve found out that I had a miscarriage, and I have an iron and Vitamin D deficiency and been threatened with CPS because my daughter isn’t getting breakfast and I’ve argued and argued that she just doesn’t wake up earlier than this because my partner has told me she wakes up later than she’s meant to. I don’t and physically can not wake up any earlier than 11am otherwise I will just crash in the middle of the day. So that’s why my partner does the mornings.
A few days ago, I woke up at 10am to my partner still asleep. And my daughter wide awake in her bed, sat up with toys (she is behind so she can’t sit herself up unless you sit her up and her toys aren’t kept in her bed, they’re on the other side of the room) I got up and gave her breakfast ect. Waiting for my partner to wake up, she is a slow eater, and she was having her after breakfast nap when he finally came downstairs at 12:30 and he said it was a one off except for today. Today he told me the most outraging information. He has only just admitted that he doesn’t wake up when she wakes up, that he only wakes up when she cries. Now she is a quiet baby, only really cries when something is wrong and really bothering her. So this “man” is waiting for my baby to cry because she is hungry to wake up and actually do something?! It breaks my heart because I wish I could do something. I am on iron and vitamin D supplements but I have to wait for them to kick in. Does anyone have any advice on what to do about her father?! As much as I love him I just want my baby girl to be safe and well and fed 3 meals a day!!! It worries me. Help!! Am I the shit mum for not seeing it sooner?
Thought I would add, he blames his ADHD for his actions, I am autistic a lot of mental health problems such as anxiety and depression, and something bigger that is still being looked into (bpd bd and spd being the main ones they’re looking for)