Takinf care of a love one with MS

[19meimei]

Do others find it very difficult to do at times I feel like it consumes my whole life and that makes me feel like I'm a bad person

[jimeka]

You are entitled to a life yourself. Maybe if you made time for yourself you wouldn’t feel as you do. Blessings Jimeka

[goatgal]

dear little sister, you are a good person because you are taking care of someone you love. The best life for each of you is found in the balance between obligation to someone you love and care for your self. Everyone's circumstances are different, so what might work for others, might not work for you. Make a list of all the things you'd like to do in a morning or afternoon; perhaps it is to meet a friend for coffee or lunch, perhaps it's as simple as take a walk, or go to an afternoon movie. Then plan opportunities to take those spirit restoring breaks. If we don't take care of ourselves, we can't take care of someone else.

[mrsmike9]

Put on your oxygen mask first! You are no good for anyone if you're wearing yourself out. See if you can find something you enjoy and work in some time for you. See if someone can give some respite. You and your loved one's relationship will suffer if you don't take care of yourself.

[ahrogers]

I think this is common for caregivers regardless of the diagnosis of the person being cared for. I recommend looking for caregiver support groups. Sometimes you can find respit support to give you a break.

[Amore55]

What good advice you are getting here. There is a gentleman in my apartment building who takes care of his wife. He always talks about how he wishes he could do something outside of the apartment, but when presented with solutions, he doesn’t take action. I know that you MUST take care of yourself, as others have mentioned. This is so important so that you will bless the life of your loved one. Keep talking to u, if you need or want to. We really understand. ❤️

[NorasMom]

My only experience with this was a grandmother in the early stages of Alzheimer's. She was still able to do for herself; she just got a little weird at night. That's when I was tired from work and wanted nothing more than to just unwind. I don't know how many times I had to jump out of bed because she was going outside, down in the cellar, or burning something in the kitchen.

There was nothing I could about her "sundowning", but I started getting up a bit earlier in the morning and taking some time then for myself. I'd read, drink coffee on the back porch, and just relax while I could. MAKE time every day for yourself. There's a reason that most businesses provide lunch and coffee breaks. You need a chance to relax and reset yourself.

[Sandydemop]

all good advice. you are not a bad person. You are being human which is not a bad thing. keep sharing here anytime.

[carolek572 CommunityAmbassador]

Welcome to the forum! You need to take care of yourself, first,    19meimei , because you cannot take care of your loved one properly if you don’t. Is there someone in your family that can assist you? Can you get someone else to care for them for an hour while you can do something for yourself? Sometimes, just going out for a walk can be helpful. For more resources, go to mymsaa.org Take care of yourself, and I look forward to hearing more from you. 🤗