My MSAA Community
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Not Fit to Be Around

I wonder how many of us have difficulties with irritability. I hear sarcastic and snarky quips coming out of my mouth when I least expect it, but particularly when I'm tired. I spend a lot of time apologizing. I've always been very able to make stupid, thoughtless remarks long before MS, but since MS, I'm appalled at myself. I feel as though I need to apologize before I ever say anything to anybody, just in case. It makes me want to withdraw from people. Do any of you suffer with this?

48 Replies
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All the time

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I seem to be doing less of this more recently. MS has forced me to slow down and be less impatient with myself and others. But don’t worry. I have retained many of my other bad habits 😜

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I like your reply

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Being irritable (I think) is inevitable. I’m tired a lot of the time and lots of noise bothers me. It’s especially bad when the 4 grandchildren are over. The cacophony can be overwhelming for me. I hate being that way, and sometimes it feels like I’m pushing them away. My only hope is that they will know that it’s just the noise and not them that bothers me. Now I don’t make snarky remarks to them, I just retreat to my shop or studio to gain my composure. It’s a constant battle.

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Noise is my enemy as well. I swear my mom had MS cuz my whole life she always complained about noises and everyone being to loud. Now i get it and sound just like her when i complain to my man as he is very loud!

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Absolutely! And I hate to tell you, but it doesn't get any better. My poor Husband! He is truly a Saint!

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Your not alone - I've always have been an "unmuzzled" individual but before MS I had more self control - but when MS first reared it head, I was just out of control. Now I really try to hold back any first thoughts as they can be extremely biting.

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I'd really like to have a "mute" button.

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Yes, and I am constantly reminded to 'chew' on my words BEFORE I spit them out! :-D

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Yes, I seem to have snappy answers at time and don’t mean to be that way 😖. Hope everyone has a wonderful day 👍🙏🐾🎃 Ken

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Yes, it's common among our team. I've learned to improve on handling it.

I leave the area if it's bothering me. I think to myself what good hearing I have and sense

of smell when things get too loud and smell.

Best Regards,

Leslie

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Yes, it's on my list. I've learned to slow down when responding to people.

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Yep, i have that problemo too, my poor hub/caregiver puts uw/it sum & enuff, i find myself apologizing too greater, but don't retreat, just breathe (deep breaths), & truly think bout what to say, slow down, i've learned to slow down, cuz don't know why but M.S. makes me talk like im on Meth or something high!😕 which i am @ kn0t!!😜 Blessings🙏Prayers & Love U!❤💚💗❤ --Jazzy🌹💜

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Before MS I did speak my mind. My sister would and still does say if you need some to be said have me do. I guess I missed the line for filters before I popped out.

Sometimes some people just need to hear it straight out.

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I have heard its called “disinhibition” i just read it somewhere recently. I just dont remember they whole why about it.

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I have compassion but at the same time if I have something to say I need to say it. I can’t do the what if I had said that done that.

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Have zero ability to handle it anymore...

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Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes and to the 4th POWER YES! I'm super sensitive, "kinda speak my truth" but always get told by my significant other that I hurt his feelings! If we hold too many inner emotions inward won't that manifest into stress hence turn into bad health????? We are who we in this MS journey, true friends and love ones will slowly learn to figure us prayerfully/hopefully!

NeeC

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Oh, yes..especially if I'm tired or feeling overwhelmed. Seems "I'm sorry" is my hourly mantra some days.

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I had to do that yesterday every time i opened my mouth or sent a text. I even told my man i wud rip his head off if he kept talking. Apology, apology, apology.....

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Only everything that comes out of my mouth.

Donnie

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I can’t imagine you ever being snotty.

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I don’t think so either it’s just what I’m told by my wife.😇😇😇

Donnie

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I use my "mute" button extensively. As a result I am considered a curmudgeon. I consider being a curmudgeon the Lesser evil. Most of the time I am able to suppress this image.

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I think I'll invest in duct tape. Directions: apply liberally and often.

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Hahaha 😂 It would hurt taking it off. 👍❤🌷

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I think mine would stay indefinitely anyway.

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😂❤🌷

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I have been a snarky master long before MS. 😁 When I was first put on Avonex one of the things listed as a side effect was that it could make me irritable and more prone to in short be snarky. I showed one of my coworkers the pamplet and she asked me how anyone was supposed to know the difference. I laughed hard and said that I guess that wouldn't affect me.

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Snark Master 🤣

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I have to monitor myself when I’m fatigued or I become something I’m not. I have dry dark sarcastic humor, if you can believe that 😂🤷‍♀️

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Not in a million years!

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My sister and myself we love sarcastic humor. When we meet someone they eventually get the hang of it and follow suit then they blame us for corrupting them because they weren’t that way before they met us.

My mother’s friend has this daughter who out of nowhere told her mother we were her best friends but we never hung around her because she didn’t get us and felt uncomfortable being around us because we were sarcastic. That one I didn’t get.

She invited us to hangout with her for her bday one year and I asked my mother why she would want us to come when she doesn’t know us outside of knowing you. Come to find out her mother asked my mother to have us come because she didn’t have any friends and could we not be sarcastic because she had emotional issues and didn’t understand what it meant. We did go it was extremely awkward but we did it because no one should be alone on their bday. She told told us she had the time of her life that day.

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Wow, that’s really nice of you and such a sad story.

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I get you. I have the same humor

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I do but don’t know until I get comments from others. Sometimes I think 🤔 that someone else gets away with their comments but it’s ok. Why?

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Yes I relate to the frustration. I have to ask my husband when with people, if I said anything inappropriate. When in a group I am not relaxed, and I fear what I may say.

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For me, I find that noise bothers me more & more. I also realized it bothers me the most when I'm tired & hurting somewhere on my body. Since I am aware of it now, I need to try to correct it so not to intentionally hurt someone. Just because I have ms doesn't give me an excuse to not be responsible for my actions. It's just one more thing that I have had to make life changes due to ms.

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I so agree.

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Trouble with MS is, it's just there at the forefront of the mind, and when we are tired it gets uncontrollable - if only we could immobilise the tongue every now and again! ☺

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Like many others, I have always spoken my mind. Have been known among my friends as the "head b*tch". Hubby has also always known how I can sometimes be - and married me anyway! But since MS has reared its ugly head, I am impatient, cranky and irritable! Especially when I'm fatigues, which hits me almost every day. I apologize to hubby and explain why, but for this one thing, he does not get it!

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I could write a book filled with my smart a$$ remarks and uncalled for and unintentionally mean responses etc. I’ve always had little patience for people but between the effects of my various ailments and all the meds I should just start wearing a tss shirt that says “avoid at all costs” or “ not fit for human consumption. Invariably my saint of a wife bears the brunt of many of these comments due solely to proximity. I try to make point of mulling something over for a few moments before opening my mouth. I’ve had limite success with that but in the interim have become an expert apologist. if I’m also drowning in depression and self-pity at the time, all bets are off. It’s still a work in progress and probably will be for some time. After all, almost without exception the people who suffer the most are only trying to help out or be nice to me. However, I grow weary of my life consisting of my health and having that dominate most discussions.

In short, I’m finding many new ways of saying I’m sorry and using them far more than I’d like to. Yet another gift that keeps on giving.

Dave

Shaken, not stirred...

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You said it perfectly. I think there are many of us in the same boat. I wish I could swim better; I’d jump that ship in a heartbeat!

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I just read this article "MS Does Not Excuse Poor Behavior" and I thought about this post. The article did make a point but we need to just let it out. People seem to find that one last nerve and you just have to let it go. For me it not MS it's me reacting to the moment but if someone wants to blame MS for what I did I have no problem with it

here is the link below

multiplesclerosisnewstoday....

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Yes, I just read that and believe it’s true. But I find I have needed to explain to friends that I have trouble with spitting out things I don’t mean and ask for forgiveness and understanding ahead of time. So far, they’ve been understanding.

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All the time. My Daughter's coach thinks I'm rude. I like to be heard not ignored. Awwwwwwe Well! 👀❤🌷

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So, when I opened up my credit card monthly statement there was a fairly large charge for a dog training collar which I then googled and saw that it sends the strongest “signal/shock” of anything on the market.

Problem is, we don’t have a dog. 😳

It should have raised a red flag when she asked me my neck size!

“Watts” the matter with me?

I think I may in for a “shock” which I must say is “revolting”.

I think I may be in for an “electrifying” experience!

On the other hand, she’s probably earned her way through the Costco size pack of 9 volt batteries and then some. There are times when her halo gets in the way too.

Dave

I realize that many, if not all members don’t sign their posts. It’s a habit that was ingrained in me decades ago so my intent is to continue to do so unless it violates a rule or offends anyone in any way. If so please don’t hesitate to say so.

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Signing off with your name is perfectly fine! Some folks don't feel comfortable using their real names online, but please do what makes you most comfortable.

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